Welcome to Ghost of a Podcast. I’m your host, Jessica Lanyadoo. I’m an astrologer, psychic medium, and animal communicator, and I’m going to give you your weekly horoscope and no bullshit, mystical advice for living your very best life.

Welcome to Ghost of a Podcast, the podcast where I answer listener questions every week—well, at least once a week. And when I answer listener questions, you may notice that I pick questions that don’t really even have answers because I love those kinds of questions. I mean, you know I love a practical question as well. 

But this week I have a question that in some ways there is no real answer to, and it’s from Disappointed, But Not Surprised. And she says, “I’m so upset, saddened, frustrated, and angry over our political landscape. Is it too much to ask for a presidential candidate who does not have any sexual allegations against them? Tara Reade’s interview hit home for me as a survivor myself, and now I feel so hopeless for the future. How do we choose slash vote between two evils? How can we heal our trauma’s in a world that dismisses them? Please keep my name anonymous.” She was born March 22nd, 1999, 6:48 p.m. in Waco, Texas. 

So there’s two really important parts of your question. The first part, which in some ways there is no real answer to, but I’m going to endeavor to unpack it. And then the second part which is really tender and about your feelings and about trauma in a traumatic world. Let’s start with the beginning. 

I myself am really a progressive person. I really have leftist politics, and, personally, me, I don’t often see politicians that are representing my values that are actually elected officials. There’s some—there are for sure some, but at the presidential level, not so much, my friends, not so much. That said, I understand your feelings of hopelessness. It is not too much to ask our presidential candidates to not be accused of or implicated in misogynistic, violent attacks or any other terrible thing, right. But this is not the world we live in. So I am not going to get into Trump and Biden. 

Some of you listening might really like Biden. So, listen, Biden is a very fucking problematic guy, IMO. This allegation against him for sexual assault, to say that it’s problematic is an understatement. But Trump is a fascist. Trump is a real danger. Now, does the DNC have a lot of work to do? You better believe it. Does Joe Biden have a lot of answering to do? You better believe it. Is it a fucked-up system? Yep. Yep, you better believe it. 

But here’s the thing. When we learn information, when we learn data that’s upsetting, whether it’s about the world or about someone in our personal lives, we can understand—cognitively understand the problem, right. But if we do not accept—emotionally accept the reality of that problem, then we may intelligently understand the problem and stay stuck in this, I get it, but... I get it, but… I get it, but… When we emotionally accept the landscape that we are stuck on at this moment, we can start to cope with it. 

Now, I personally am very fucking pro-voting. I am very pro-voting. I want to emphatically encourage every single one of you to vote. And listen, I have of friends who don’t actually believe in voting, and they don’t—they’re very progressive people, and they don’t believe in voting. But here’s the reason why I think you should fucking vote, okay, even if it’s between two really problematic candidates. Because Republicans have spent decades and countless resources and money and manpower blocking your right to vote—blocking your access to vote. In particular, doing this through gerrymandering and getting people of color less access to vote. If it wasn’t important to vote, if your vote didn’t mean anything, they wouldn’t be trying so hard to make you not vote. 

We are the majority, and when I say we, I mean women. I mean marginalized people. I mean people of color. There is a small powerful majority who runs this country, and the way that that will change—it’s not posting on social media. It’s not giving up. The way it changes is if we all come together with our different values and our different perspectives and our different take, but we come together, and we demand representation. And at this moment, who we are demanding it from is either Trump or Biden—that’s a bummer, but it is who we’re choosing between. And, so, for me, it becomes—even though I am not a fan of Biden—it is a very easy choice to choose Biden because Trump is so terrifying and such, just across the board, a bad human person. 

So, from my perspective, if you accept that we have never had a president that was perfect, if you accept that the world is so deeply problematic, if you can accept those things—which is heartbreaking, but not new; it’s not novel, right—if you can accept those things, then you can start to make choices around how to engage. And on a political level that means casting your damn vote for the lesser of two evils. That’s what I think. 

And, again, I want to reiterate, if sexual abuse survivors, if queer people, if people of color, if people of varied abilities, people who are sick, if all of us band together and vote for our own human interests, then we are not going to continue to have long-term these kinds of options. Maybe what I’m saying is idealistic. Maybe what I’m saying is conservative. I don’t know. I can’t tell, but it’s my take on it. 

And you know as I’ve talked about on the podcast before, because we have so much going on with Saturn, because Saturn has been in Capricorn—and right now it’s in Aquarius, which is the empowerment of the individual in many ways, but it’s going to retrograde back out of Aquarius and back into Capricorn—this is a moment for working within the system to overthrow the Goddamned system. Work with me, my friends, within the system to overthrow the system. And maybe you’re going to overthrow the system from outside the system. I’m excited about that too. But giving up, being helpless and hopeless—don’t do that to yourself. Don’t do that to all of us. 

You’re not obliged to do anything. I’m just cheerleading you to stay in it. Because if as much people voted in elections as they do for fucking American Idol or whatever bullshit there is, this would be a different world. It would have to be a different world. 

So that actually brings me to the more psychologically and emotionally important part of your question, which is how can we heal our traumas in a world that dismisses them? Healing from trauma is a form of resistance, and sometimes resistance is holding your ground during a Goddamned storm. And sometimes resistance is fighting back. Sometimes resistance is walking the fuck away. But centering your own self, not in a narcissistic or a selfish way, but in a way that is humane and just, that understands that you deserve to be safe; you deserve to be well; you deserve to have control over your own body, what happens to it. That is radical. 

And it’s really important in a world that systemically over the course of centuries has discouraged women and people of color and people with heath conditions or health struggles, poor people, and people who have been marginalized and kept down. We’ve been told we don’t matter. We have not had power in governance or in the economy, majoritively. The more of us that recognize that we are the fucking majority—yes, we are the majority, and if we can come together and be consistent and participate, we win. Saturn and Aquarius, my loves. Coming together as individuals for a collective vision of dignity and humanity, that’s how we win. 

And, on a personal level, you don’t need them to center you for you to center you. You don’t need your oppressor to become a better person in order for you to know your value. And this keys into your chart, my dear. Because when I look at your birth chart what I see is that you have two really important things for me to name. The first of which is a Saturn conjunction to Venus. And your Saturn conjunction to Venus is in Taurus. It’s getting hit by Uranus right now. 

What this indicates is that you have a hard time with self-esteem, and you have a tendency to look outside of yourself for validation or verification of your worth. And this is something that has been changing over the past year or so as Uranus has been hitting this conjunction. This is a time for radical self-acceptance. This is a time for understanding that you are not alone. And this is one of the beautiful things about astrology is it shows you that the things that you’ve experienced as an individual, the very personal, very private things you’ve experienced as an individual, they don’t just happen to you; they have happened to countless other people. 

Part of why that is true is because there are systems in place that empower perpetrators to sometimes not even know that they’re perpetrators. It empowers perpetrators to feel that they are entitled. And when we understand that our personal experience actually doesn’t exist only in our own experience, in our own birth chart; it exists within the collective, and it is a collective pain. When you recognize that, it is easier for you to find your purpose. Because having this Saturn/Venus conjunction in Taurus actually indicates that you are a person with purpose. You’re also a young person, so if that doesn’t click as I know what purpose is, that’s okay. At this stage, at this age, it might simply be yes, I know I have purpose. I haven’t figured out what the hell to do with it yet. That’s okay. You’re not supposed to have all the answers in your twenties—be patient. 

Now, the other thing I want to name is that you in your birth chart have a Pluto/Moon opposition. This does indicate trauma. And not everybody who has it in birth chart is a survivor of violence or trauma, but it’s not an uncommon experience for people with this opposition. And the intensity of your emotions run deep—they run real deep. But here’s the thing: within this opposition is also the power of healing. 

And that for you might mean healing your own trauma in your own past, finding your value and your worth and healing. And it also might mean that for you, part of your healing journey is service for others. That might be advocacy. It might be education. It might be direct service. It might just be how you are as a friend or a community member. But looking at your birth chart, because you have Moon in Gemini in the ninth house opposite Pluto in Sagittarius down in the third, I actually think the potential for advocacy and education is really high. 

And, again, you don’t need to prioritize that at this age or at this stage. You don’t have to prioritize it ever. But if it feels resonant for you, explore it. And don’t pressure yourself—making sure that in your pain and in your struggle, you do not abandon or bully yourself is a big part of your healing process.

My dear, take it gently, but when helplessness or hopelessness emerges, if you can, greet it with determination and the commitment to do whatever you can—however small it is today or tomorrow—whatever you can to tangibly be a part of the solutions that we so greatly need. Social and political change does not happen easily. It doesn’t happen in one foul swoop. Be patient but stay with it.

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My loves, we got to talk about the astrology of this week because there is a lot going on. But, of course, before we get into it, I got some stuff to say. The first thing is if you haven’t already signed up for my Ask Me Anything on May 30th, you can go to my website and sign up there. All proceeds will go to NBO and the Sovereign Bodies Institute. 

Also, if you want to get real nerdy with me and learn some astrology, on the weekend of May 23rd and 22nd, I will be speaking at a thing called NORWAC, which is an astrological conference, which is usually in person, but this year ’twill be virtual. And you can catch me speaking about how to be a professional astrologer on a panel, and I’ll be giving a couple of other talks. On the 22nd, I’ll be speaking on inherited conditions in the birth chart, and then on the 23rd, I’ll be speaking on outer planets and love. Who doesn’t want to hear that? I ask you. Who doesn’t want to hear it? 

Also, June 1st, I’m going to be doing an exciting event with Rachel Howe of Fat and the Moon, which I’m so excited about. I’ll share more details about that soon, but just sign up for my mailing list if you’re in the market. I’m really bad at sending out mailings, so you’re not going to get hammered with a bunch of stuff from me because she’s just not good at it. And, yeah, I just third personed myself—get over it.

So this week I want to just touch in on something before I get into the horoscope. More and more I am getting asked in interviews, by people in general in public and in private to predict what’s coming next, how long all this stuff is going to last. And I just want to take a moment to talk about astrology and the difference between prediction and forecasting—also the value of prediction. 

I am not of the mind that hard prediction is especially useful a lot of the times. And I also am of the mind that it is better to get a little bit of information that you can actually use than a lot of information that shuts you down. If you’re thinking about the astrology of 2021 or 2024, and if you’re thinking about far off in the future, there are moments and times that that’s useful, but, by and large, astrology’s dangerous for that kind of thinking because there’s no end to what you can get into. But there is a limit to its value, there really is. 

What I believe is that when we use astrology as a way to avoid this present moment, to avoid leveraging our agency in the here and now to be the best possible version of ourselves, when we do that, we’re doing a disservice to ourselves, and we’re doing a disservice to the craft. Now, a lot of astrologers wouldn’t agree with me on that at all. A lot of astrologers, their practice is actually netted in prediction, but I am not the one. 

I really use astrology as a tool for healing, for counselling, for self-understanding, and for civic duty. And the potential there is huge because the healthier you are as an individual, the better community member you inevitably are. So if your wellness and your healthiness is at the expense of others, if it’s at the expense of the community, then, meh, it’s probably not real healthiness and wellness, right. 

Looking for an answer is normal. It’s normal to want to the answer, but it actually isn’t the point. If you’re going to look to astrology for what’s going to happen next with x, y, or z thing, I urge you to consider where am I now? What are my skills? What are my resources? What are my limitations? What are my stumbling blocks, and how can I do the best from where I am with what I’ve got to be a part of the solutions I’m seeking in my life and in the world around us? That’s the move. So I just wanted to say that, so I said it. It’s been said. 

And now to your horoscope. We are looking at the week—it’s not really horrifying; I didn’t mean to scare you—we are looking at the week of May 17th through the 23rd of 2020. And this week has got a lot of things worth talking about, including but not limited to Venus Retrograde. So if you haven’t already caught episode 107— it’s not just about Venus; it’s about Venus Retrograde—I did a nice little check in about Venus itself, what the planet means, what it indicates, and then what a Venus Retrograde indicates. If you’re interested in more, on my schminstagram, which is conventionally known as Instagram, I dropped a quick little Q&A where I just hopped on with people and answered questions about Venus Retrograde, including the very common question, I have Venus Retrograde in my birth chart, what does it mean for me now? Hop on over there, follow me there, and you’re going to get more information about that. 

And then stay tuned because episode 109 of the Astrology Hot Takes is going to be practical, simple rituals and exercises for Venus Retrograde. Because this is a moment; it’s a time. Nothing to fear. There’s nothing scary about this Venus Retrograde. There’s nothing scary about Venus Retrograde in general. But it is an opportunity for you to make use of. 

So let’s talk about the first transit of the week. On the 17th, the Sun in Taurus forms a Trine to Jupiter in Capricorn. This is delightful. This is freaking delightful. This transit represents a harmonious energy between the identity and the potential for growth and expansion. This is a great time if you’ve been needing a break, if you’ve been having a hard time, this is a great time for actually using the resources around you, for connecting with people, for allowing yourself to find enjoyment and pleasure, but also to educate yourself, to expand your horizons, to do things differently. It’s a lovely transit. 

It’s also really good if you need to deal with money stuff—if there’s some financial decisions you need to make. The transit itself is not especially financial, but because we’re looking at these two planets being in earth signs, it’s good for kind of investing. Now I’m not encouraging you to invest in the stock market obvi, but I’m saying investing in your material world. If you’re a gardener, if you’re all of a sudden like, I’m planting a victory garden, this is a great time to get to your gardening, see. So I would encourage you to play with that. 

The only downside that is possible with this transit, in my view, is if you are caught up in a cycle of self-indulgence, if you’re over-imbibing substances, if you’re indulging any kind of addiction that’s kind of in the family of eating disorder stuff or other forms of self-harm that come out of compulsion—this transit represents a great flow of energy. And so the downside is you could overdo an unhealthy thing if you don’t choose to consciously leverage this energy. 

It’s not a great time to go clothes shopping online because you’ll just be like, it’s cute; I’ll buy it. It's cute; I’ll buy it. I’ll deal with it later. Don’t do that. This transit represents a great potential of energy, and it just requires that you decide to leverage it, to use it for your betterment. And this is where I will remind you this lesson, which is that not all things that bring you pleasure are good for you, and not all things that are painful or difficult are bad for you. Something to think about this week—something to think about in general.

And that brings us to the 20th. Now I warned you—I warned you what was going to go down on the 20th, didn’t I? I don’t know if you remember. Back on May 3rd, we had a Venus square to Neptune, and it is back on the 20th. Sorry. Sorry, Charlie. So think back to May 3rd. It wasn’t that long ago, right. Think back to May 3rd and really consider what was going on around that date. This is really important because what it will allow you to do is see your part of the theme. 

Do not fixate on what other people are or aren’t doing. The key here is to recognize that most all of your relationship issues or our relationship issues are an opportunity to have better boundaries. Isn’t that kind of cool? Maybe it’s a little upsetting. It’s both. How about that? Because Venus square to Neptune, it inclines us to not have good boundaries because we feel that the only way to be a good person is to be nice, even when it’s at the expense of kindness. 

So niceness is when I smile in your face, and you have a huge piece of broccoli in your teeth, but I’m being nice. Kindness is me saying, “Hey, babe. You got broccoli in your teeth.” You know what I’m saying? Kindness can be uncomfortable. It’s not always as comfortable as niceness. Niceness can be quite surface and not very real. 

So this particular transit, Venus square to Neptune, is, of course, happening during this Venus Retrograde, where we are meant to be reviewing and reflecting our values and how they show up in relationships—in our relationship to money, to people, to our possessions. And also on the 20th, it’s Gemini season—the Sun moves into Gemini. And so having this Venus Retrograde square to Neptune at the onset of Gemini season, I think, indicates that we are going to be in a solar season that is very heavily themed with boundaries. 

So if you’re fixating on, my ex contacted me and said this and that and this and that, or my mother called me and did this and that and this and that, what you want to really center yourself around is do you know what your value is? Do you know what their value is? Are you acting in ways that reflect your values? Are you expressing your boundaries with your behavior? Are you doing it with kindness? And if the answer to any of these things is no, cool. That’s a place for you to investigate. That’s a place for you to get to know yourself better. 

These transits are not here to torture you; they’re not here to harm you. They are here to help you grow. They’re here to help you heal. This might not feel good, but that doesn’t make it bad. If you’re confronted by relationship problems, then what you’re truly being confronted by is your own patterns as they’re manifesting in relationships. And that’s freaking cool because if you can cope with the pattern, you don’t just deal with the one individual problem you’re having with the one individual person in a one individual moment; you start to deal with the part of you that is attracted to the same thing over and over again, that acts in the same way over and over again, even though it doesn’t ever really give you what you want, right. 

We have to be willing and able to interrupt our narratives about ourselves, about others, about what’s fair or what’s right or what’s reasonable. And I’m not saying because there’s something wrong with what you think; I don’t know what you think. Maybe it’s perfect, but we have to be willing to interrupt our narratives to challenge and question our thinking and our assumptions because in doing so we expand what’s possible and what we can choose, what we have access to, and then what we actually do. And so pay attention this Gemini season to that theme, and certainly pay attention on and around the 20th to these themes because this Venus square to Neptune is coming back for a third hit—’tis not over, see. ’Tis not over. This is a long-term issue.

Now, one more thing I want to say about this, which is the ways in which it is related to COVID-19 and shelter and place. Neptune is a planet associated with your immune system, and Venus square to Neptune may coincide with people just being like, I’m sick of being indoors. I’m sick of not being social—fuck it. Understand that your restlessness around your need to be around people, your need to be social, your need for your life to better reflect what you want it to, that might be really agitated around this transit and in particular during Gemini season. 

What’s important is that you cope with it in ways that reflect your values and that don’t center your values over everyone else’s. Do you know what I’m saying? Wash your Goddamned hands obvi. Wear a mask in public if you’re going out. Don’t go to bars and clubs and big social events right now where we can’t have social distancing rules—six feet apart. 

Okay, one more date to talk about and two more transits. On the 22nd, we will still be feeling the effects of Venus square to Neptune, just why, but on the 22nd, Mercury will be sitting on top of that Venus Retrograde, and the Sun will be forming a glorious trine to Saturn. 

So Mercury conjunction to Venus. Honestly, I don’t really think of it as a very noticeable transit, unless it’s really touching on something in your birth chart. Its just nice. It’s social. It’s good if you’re an artist or a writer. It just helps you to kind of have a greater amount of flow. It can help make you feel cute. It can help make you kind of like, I don’t know, stumble upon a great show to stream, just a nice transit. It’s a gentle breeze on a lovely day. It is not lifechanging, generally speaking. But it’s nice. It’s nice. 

Having the Sun in Gemini, trine to Saturn in Aquarius is a lovely transit because it’s stabilizing. If you’ve been struggling, if you’ve been kind of like struggling with your mental health, your emotional health, your relationships, whatever, this can be a very grounding transit, and it can be activating. So if you’ve been kind of playing with making agreements, taking a new approach to something, or kind of really committing to something you are engaged in, Sun trine to Saturn, that’s what you want to see. That’s a great transit. 

Again, this transit, like all trines, is unlikely to really be spectacular in its effects, unless you leverage its effects. If you’ve got something to do that requires concentration, that requires pragmatic thinking, that requires you to show up, this is a great date to choose to do that. You will not be absolved of the Venus Retrograde themes. You will not be absolved of the Venus square to Neptune themes because those two transits are overlapping, basically, this whole week. And so Venus Retrograde is overlapping a month, but this Venus square to Neptune, you’re going to feel it all week. 

And so you’re going to feel off. You’re going to feel anxious, but that’s okay because, again, it’s an opportunity to have boundaries. And when we have this lovely Sun trine to Saturn, it actually really strengthens your willingness and ability to resource yourself, to figure out what boundaries you need to have, to do what you need to do to maybe practice meditation, maybe practice mindfulness breathing or positive reinforcement thinking. There’s a lot of ways of doing it that doesn’t have to cost money and doesn’t have to take a million hours. Prioritize and center self-care as a way to not only manage your inner wellness, but your ability to respond to your life in a healthy, helpful, and sustainable way. Real talks. 

Okay, now, as promised, I will reiterate the transits of the week. On the 17th, the Sun forms a trine to Jupiter. On the 20th, we enter Gemini season, and we have the second hit of the Venus square to Neptune transit. On the 22nd, we have two transits: Mercury forming a conjunction to that Venus Retrograde and Sun trine to Saturn. 

My loves, I thank you once again for joining me for another week of Ghost of a Podcast. If you have questions for the podcast, send them to me at ghostofapodcast.com. Check out the show notes because the link is always there. 

Follow me on social media, you know, Instagram, Twitter—I’m there. I’m just hanging out doing stuff. Join the community over at Patreon. Let’s go all the way. Why don’t we? Why don’t we? Reviews and stars are always greatly appreciated. Subscribe to the podcast, if you haven’t already. 

Be patient with your progress. Do your best and embrace your learning curve, my loves. And I will talk to you next week. Bye.