Welcome to Ghost of a Podcast. I'm your host, Jessica Lanyadoo. I'm an astrologer, psychic medium, and animal communicator, and I'm going to give you your weekly horoscope and no-bullshit mystical advice for living your very best life.

COVID-19 is raging again, and healthcare workers need our support. Consider donating to Emotional PPE at emotionalppe.org. They're an organization that provides any worker in healthcare impacted by COVID-19 free mental health services with licensed therapists. Another way you can help is by donating to your local general hospital's spiritual care department and to earmark that donation for staff support. Give what you can.

This week, I am joined by Danielle.

Jessica: I am very excited to have you on the show. And, Danielle, before you share your question with me, I want to acknowledge we are not sharing your birth information. We're going to keep that private for now. But welcome to Ghost of a Podcast. Tell me what you would like to ask about.

Danielle: Thank you, Jessica. I'd like to ask about money. My relationship with money has been complicated. I've been temporarily financially challenged for a really long time. I am fundraising right now for a project that means so much to me that involves supporting Black medicine people like myself and being financially secure and stable and nurtured and able to work from a place that is full and not stressing about money. And while I'm doing this, I am very much financially insecure personally and hitting a peak of stress. So yeah. I welcome whatever you see/feel about my relationship with money and what needs to shift so that I can be in more of a place of receptivity.

Jessica: Okay. This is great. I mean, not that you're financially struggling. I love the work that you're doing, obviously. It's excellent and much needed. But also, part of why I was so drawn to your question is because of how it's the right question for you to be asking. This is a really big deal. So the first thing I want to kind of point towards is that in your birth chart, you have Venus, the planet that governs many things, including your personal finances, conjunct your Midheaven and your North Node. And these three things are pretty tightly sitting on top of each other.

And so I want to start off by saying, yeah, you did not come into this life with a really clear grasp of what money is worth to you, how to make it, how to hold it, why you should bother, whether or not that's a good thing for you, that kind of stuff. This is where in your birth chart, your personal finances, your sense of value in the world, your sense of meaning and direction in your life, and your career at-large are all smooshed into one big Piscean sandwich issue. So, again, you're asking the right question about how to make money for yourself is keyed into the service that you feel called to provide in the world and the path you want to place yourself on, not just this month or this year, but as an adult in the world.

In addition to that, in your birth chart, you have a stellium in the sixth house. And that means you have a concentration of planets in the place of work and habit, and in that concentration is just kind of a messy mix of planets. You've got Neptune and Uranus, who are just like, "Capitalism? Who cares? No. I reject," Saturn, who's like, "Capitalism? Yes. I will find the rules. I will learn the rules. I will master the rules," and then Mars, who's just like, "I need to get mine. I need to figure this out." And so this combination of planets is messing with your Pisces stellium at the top of the chart.

And so the conversation between value and service and your personal finances and then what you do and how that fits into what is authentic and right for you, and also the amount of time and repetition that all those things take, it's kind of the most stressy thing in your birth chart. And so, whether we're talking about money or how you organize your time in relationship to your ambitions, these are kind of your sticky places in the birth chart. Does this make sense?

Danielle: Sure does.

Jessica: Okay. Sorry. Sorry about that. So let me just slow myself down and just check in. So tell me what you do again.

Danielle: I'm an artist and bodyworker, energetic bodyworker. So I have my private practice, and I also have side jobs.

Jessica: Right. Okay. And do you want your private practice to be a 40-hour or 30-hour workweek? Do you want that to be your bread and butter, or not necessarily?

Danielle: I want to be stewarding the shop as for the majority of my workweek. Seeing clients and teaching is also part of my weekly flow, but for how and where I spend my days, I want to be at the shop. I want to be making medicine and in the garden, and then seeing clients as well, and teaching and writing.

Jessica: Okay. Okay. So will you be able to see clients and teach maybe right from the shop?

Danielle: Yes.

Jessica: Will that be part of what the shop is?

Danielle: Exactly.

Jessica: It's like a community center-style shop.

Danielle: It is. It's a practitioner space and classroom, medicine garden, and apothecary.

Jessica: Beautiful. Okay. Great. So, first of all, because you have Uranus and Neptune and Mars in the sixth house, having a physical space but also a daily routine, a.k.a. a job, that has a lot of things going on is really important for you. It's really important for you because you do get really restless and bored with things if they're kind of the same every day. Additionally, I think that your concentration, like your focus, does better when you can come at one thing and then shift your focus onto something else and then come back to that first thing and then go to the fifth thing. That actually really does work for you. And again, does that make sense?

Danielle: It does. I get really into things when I'm—like I can write for 16 hours. I can get really—

Jessica: Wow.

Danielle: Well, that's an exaggeration.

[crosstalk]

Danielle: But I can get into what I'm doing and have to be really intentional about stopping and taking care of my body and taking a rest, and yeah. But I can spend a lot of time on something that I'm really into. I do love a variety of things that I'm into in different ways and that get me—it's just my body responds so much better. And I think there's some perfectionism, societal poisoning that I'm healing from. And yeah.

Jessica: Yeah. I mean, also, you have a Sun/Pluto square. So we can look at the epigenetics of it. We can look at the inherited trauma of it. We could look at a million different layers of it. But at the end of the day, yeah, you're driven by perfectionism. Yeah. That is a part of your nature, and that is not good or bad. It is a thing that needs your stewardship because your capacity to heal yourself, your drive and capacity to bring healing to others, also comes from your Sun/Pluto square. So the Sun/Pluto square in the birth chart, it gets a bad rap for great reasons. It is a hard placement, but it is also a placement that means you can move mountains. You can create something out of nothing. You have the capacity and the energy.

So, when we see difficult squares, conjunctions, oppositions from Pluto, especially to personal planets but really to anything in the birth chart, the thing I'm always thinking about is how can you be a good steward of those energies and care for yourself and use that foundation to then care for others and how you impact others? And this is—it kind of brings us right back around to the money piece because you don't have a problem with vision. You don't have a problem with enthusiasm. You don't even have a problem with follow-through. It's more about money specifically, right?

So let me just give you a little backdrop for the past few years, and then we're going to come to present and plan for the future. Okay. So you had said when you asked your question something to the effect of you're having a short-term/long-term problem with money. Is that—I'm paraphrasing. How did you say it?

Danielle: Yes. Yes. Temporarily financially challenged.

Jessica: Yes. Okay. So yeah. The past several years, you have been going through transits that have been so destabilizing that it would impact your finances. And in particular, Neptune, as of March 2022, just got off of your Venus. And that was a two-year period. When Neptune conjoins Venus, lots of things happen. But on this topic, money tends to flow like sands through the hourglass. They just pass right through our paws. It feels impossible to hold on to resources, which—as a person who already has Venus in Pisces, it's not like you were already hoarding your duckets. So that has been happening.

Now, you're still going through a Neptune transit that is kind of elongating the vibe. So we'll talk about that in a minute. But before that, Neptune was squaring your Mars. You only had like a year or so, maybe two years', break between those two transits. Mars is in your sixth house. So for, I would say, the last five years—and there's other transits that have been occurring, but in the last five years, Neptune has been teaching you about spiritual concerns. It has been teaching you about your ego, the limitations and the necessity for it. It has been teaching you all manner of things, none of which are especially material.

Amongst the more common things that people experience under these influences are around money not sticking. So money might come, but there's always something that you need to put it into. It doesn't stay. Health, like your psychological or physical vitality, can just feel like, "I don't have the energy to do the things I technically know I can do or should do," because again, Neptune is—if there is an anti-capitalist planet, it would be Neptune because Neptune is really just about spirit and connection and that which is beyond the material. And so yeah. You've been going through a lot of that.

I want to just kind of share this with you as context for what you've been going through in the past approximately five years. It's not your whole nature. It's not your whole life, although you're young enough that it probably really feels that way. But it has been a real pain in your ass, and it has been active. So, before I kind of barrel forward, I want to ask you, did your financial temporary problems—did they kind of kick in in the last five years?

Danielle: Yes, definitely. Yeah. Absolutely. I had the first day job that I actually leaned into and felt like I can really bring my whole self to. I was celebrated as an herbalist there. I got to teach the staff herbal medicine there, and it had nothing to do with herbal medicine. They were in athletics. It was great. I was able to practice my medicine practice, as well, while I was doing that. And then I was laid off in December 2020 with the company-wide pandemic layoffs. And so, after that, it really—that was a hit for sure. I've always kept afloat, but it's been really stressful, and it's particularly now really, really hard.

Jessica: Yeah. Unfortunately, classic of this energy of Neptune is being laid off. It's not like you're being fired. There's nothing you can do. It's classic Neptune, just pulls the rug under your feet. It's just really destabilizing, and it is often kind of circumstantial. So there's kind of nothing you can do, getting laid off. Right? Okay. So there's a lot of levels to what we're going to talk about here, but I want to ground down because you're talking about money, but are you talking about money or are you talking about work, or are you talking about career, or are you talking about all three?

Danielle: I feel really clearly guided and called to the work that I'm doing, to what my contribution is. But I don't know any Black single-parent medicine women who are doing really, really well financially. I'm very clear that I'm doing what I'm meant to be doing in terms of my work, my career. I guess where the question really is is around worthiness. That's a constant healing for me is around my deservingness and my worthiness and my value.

Jessica: Okay. I think I can orient from here because I agree your sense of purpose is not the question. I personally have some questions about the execution/plan/strategy. I mean, come on, I'm a triple Capricorn. Of course I have questions about those things because while, yes, you or any of us theoretically can have it all, can we have it all at once is the question. So there's a little bit of that structure piece that I, time permitting, want to come to.

But I want to actually start at the top of your chart again because having the Venus Midheaven/North Node conjunction means that you can make good money in this lifetime doing what you feel called to do. Absolutely. That's what that means. But it means that on a soul level, you don't know how to do that. And that is linked, sure, with behavior, but it is more what you're actually naming. I'm really glad that you did it. It's about worth, a.k.a. Venus. It's about value, a.k.a. Venus. It's about being aligned, period, I guess.

And this is where I want to say something that I think is very important for me to contextualize. We live in capitalism. There are just a ton of mitigating factors, social conditions that are outside of our control. And when I talk about money from a spiritual perspective, I feel like it can get really sticky really quickly because of that reality. So I want to say what I want to share with you is spiritual and not material, and there needs to be realistic bridges between these two things. Does that make sense?

Danielle: Yes.

Jessica: Okay. Good. So, from a spiritual perspective, money is not good and money is not bad. Money is not a representation of our worth or our value, although it is a tool that we use—often against our own best judgment or against our will, but it is the tool that we use to articulate value. But it is not actually a metric of value. It is inert. Okay? And I'm just speaking spiritually, because it's not in the world, in the material world. But on a spiritual level—and this is really important because of all this Pisces stuff at the top of your chart—money has no feelings for us. Money is not here to say we're good or bad. Money is inert.

When doing spiritual work with your relationship to finances or money, it's really important to remember that you are the organic matter in the relationship; money is not. That means that when we shift ourselves on a spiritual level and our relationship to the concept of money, it shifts the relationship to money. Now, it doesn't change societal issues. It doesn't mean that all of a sudden, anything is different in the material world. But it does shift things on a spiritual level. And with Neptune in the sixth, with this strong Pisces top of your chart, that's foundational for you.

And you are somebody who has the capacity to materially manifest when your spiritual alignment is a little bit more comfortable or clear for you. Have you ever done any manifestation work or spiritual work in relationship to money?

Danielle: Yes. When I am really tending my money altar, it's flowing. Yes.

Jessica: Yep.

Danielle: And when I'm not, and when I'm so busy and it feels stagnant, it is.

Jessica: Okay. This is really great feedback. And it's not news to you, obviously. When you're doing the spiritual work, when you stay in alignment with yourself, you're in the flow.

Danielle: Yes.

Jessica: And part of what you're telling me is that the altar that you keep is a good tool in that it works, but it's not a great tool in that it takes a certain amount of consistency or energy or presence that is not realistic for your busy life all the damn time, because spiritual work on the outside often doesn't look like too much, but it is—for anyone who does it, it's just—we know it is labor. It's work. One of the things that I want to check in with is, have you ever done any kind of mantras or prayers or any kind of repetitive, simple sentences, anything like that around money?

Danielle: I have an abundance prayer taped on the wall in my bathroom.

Jessica: Excellent.

Danielle: And I look at it frequently. But I don't have a shorter saying or phrase that I can just kind of keep on my tongue.

Jessica: So I'm going to share with you, years and years ago, in the 1990s, my collaborator, Michelle Tea, taught me this money manifestation, I guess, prayer that really changed things for me in a meaningful way. I mean, it was like a foundational thing, and then I started doing other work around it. But I'm going to share it with you, and it's really simple. And it simply goes like this: "Money has a crush on me. Money wants to be around me. I like money. Money loves me." That's it. That's the whole prayer. And I want you to notice that it's silly. It's not super self-serious. It doesn't rhyme, but it's kind of like a child's rhyme. It's very simple.

And I want to share this with you because part of what can happen with that Saturn in the sixth house and your Sun/Pluto square is that it can give you a tendency to want to do the hardest possible thing in order to have the deepest impact. And just because it's difficult doesn't mean it's superior or more impactful. It can be playful. It can be light. It can be really easy to carry and easy to put into practice. And if you were to let it be that, all that Pisces stuff would be really happy. Uranus in the sixth house would be really happy. If you could do it quick and dirty, that Mars in the sixth house would be really happy. And so would the thing that we haven't talked about yet, which is you have a gorgeous Jupiter square to the Moon.

So, when things have play and when you can kind of do them quickly, it really pleases your double Cancer nature. You have a Moon and Ascendant in Cancer and Jupiter squares to your Moon. So Jupiter is impatient. Jupiter wants it now. And a quick and easy—it can be a mantra. It can be a visualization. It doesn't have to be what I've shared with you, but something quick and easy can have a really powerful impact on bringing you back into alignment, and you can then kind of connect that to your altar or not.

Danielle: I appreciate this so much. You're speaking to much of my other—much of the way that my spiritual practice works, and I'm not approaching my work with money this way. Yeah. I really appreciate it.

Jessica: It is my pleasure. And because you have this North Node conjunct your Midheaven conjunct Venus, this struggle is your struggle. And so it does not surprise me that you're like, "Yeah, I totally know this. I put this into practice and then completely forget that I know this and forget to put it into practice on the thing I actually need it for the most," because that's the Nodal Axis. Even if you technically know better, it's a soul lesson. It's an evolutionary lesson.

And so I want to really remind you to be incredibly gentle with yourself because you'll probably continue to forget to do this or find yourself making it unnecessarily complicated so that it's not sustainable because there's something within you, again, that's on a spiritual level that feels like if you keep yourself small and if you don't ask for much and you toil, it'll all come together.

Danielle: Yes, sadly.

Jessica: It's the placement of your South Node, but it's also that sixth-house stellium. A bunch of things in your chart can reiterate this. Toiling is great. I mean, again, Capricorn. I'm going to be like, "Toil. Good. Toil." Toiling can be great. The things you're talking about doing, they require labor. They require getting your hands literally dirty. That's not the problem here. It's knowing which tools are appropriate for which tasks. This is where I want to get into annoying details.

So here's my question. How are you with keeping records of what you spend and what you have coming in?

Danielle: Horrible. But my mother is really skilled at this, and I've been taught to budget. I know how to do it. I don't like to do it.

Jessica: But do you do it?

Danielle: No.

Jessica: Okay. That's what we're talking about. So having skills—and this is a thing—I can't even tell you how frequently it comes up with my work. Cognitively understanding things and having the capacity, and then being in a place where we can access that and make that choice, are completely—I mean, they're in the same book, but they're different chapters of the book. They're just different things. Neptune in the sixth house—my patented advice for this is to color-code, to make your—I don't even want to call it bookkeeping, but for lack of a better way of saying it, keeping your bookkeeping very cute and very colorful so that every time—say we're looking at utilities—it's always written in red. Or every time we're talking about money in, it's like pick your favorite color.

Now, that's if you're using something where you can manipulate the way it looks. I think you kind of have to. It has to feel like a creative and spiritual project, which is why color is so important for you, because you're very responsive to color. Again, Pisces at the top of the chart, Venus at the top of the chart, Neptune where it is, even Pluto intercepted in the fifth house in Scorpio—I mean, if it doesn't feel like a creative project, you just don't have the vibe for it. It just doesn't end up making it to your to-do list. It keeps on getting put to tomorrow's to-do list. Right? So step 1 is color-coding or cutifying.

Danielle: I color-code all my spreadsheets and everything. I love it. Yes.

Jessica: Okay. Okay. Good. So you're already doing it. And you use spreadsheets?

Danielle: Yeah. I mean, I have budgets. I don't refer to them. I don't keep them up.

Jessica: Yes. Yes, yes, yes. There's a couple things. One is grids and lists make Uranus uncomfortable—not always, but in your chart, yes. So here's the problem. You've got this Uranus/Saturn conjunction that people born in '88 have in the late degrees of Sagittarius, and so there is this kind of—when you seek to place things on paper like Saturn wants in a grid or a list, Uranus is like, "I feel trapped. This is stupid." And then you go off and you do your own thing, and Saturn is like, "Wait a minute. What about the grid that you created? What about your need to keep track of things?" So there's this kind of internal tension.

One of the things that I would recommend—and this is annoying on the onset and not annoying in the long term, okay? So short-term discomfort. It's having one credit card that you exclusively use for business-related expenses so you don't have to keep much track of it. Is that something you've ever done?

Danielle: No, it's not. But it's something I've always wanted to do and known that I should be doing.

Jessica: So that is one way of doing it. And then what I would recommend is scheduling once a month where you indulge and you buy yourself a takeout meal that you truly enjoy, or you make yourself something if you like to cook. I don't know. You've got Moon in Cancer. Maybe you like cooking. And you make it a whole event, very Venus in Pisces, like grapes and wine or whatever that version is for you. And then you go through that debit card, and you just pop things into cutified place. Does that seem like it's realistic for you?

Danielle: Oh, like make a date around it?

Jessica: Yes. Yeah.

Danielle: Oh. That's sweet.

Jessica: And make it romantic, like buy yourself a meal. Have a nice drink. This is your moment to spoil yourself because what you're doing is investing in your abundance, not managing your finances, not handling your annoying spreadsheets. You have a date with abundance, and touching your resources is a good way of doing that. So it's a reframe, and it is going to be difficult to actually do at first because it's a little like setting your alarm ten minutes fast or whatever. You know it's ten minutes fast, so you're kind of trying to manipulate yourself. But it actually will work for you because it is a form of energy work that you're doing with yourself as well as material maintenance.

Danielle: Yep. I love it.

Jessica: The other thing that I like to do is whenever I spend money, whether it's with a card or cash, whatever, if I'm at the grocery store and I am paying somebody and the person who's taking my money is not getting my money—whoever owns the grocery store is getting it. But I like to, whenever I have an exchange of resources, set a quick little prayer or a quick little intention to say, "May we both be touched by abundance through this exchange." I just like to have it be a spiritual energy work moment while I'm paying, and even when I'm not paying a person who actually is handling the cash, which is often the case.

This again brings a little bit more juj and a little bit more intention and more magic into the mundane and often demoralizing things that we end up doing day to day with money. That is really good for somebody as spiritual as you and somebody who works with energy as much as you. Again, it's not going to change the late-stage capitalism. It's not going to miraculously make racism and institutionalized racism go away. But it is going to shift energetically so much for you. The way that your chart is written, again, you could have a lot of money, like a lot of money.

Danielle: That's lovely to hear.

Jessica: It's not bad. But here's the thing. Here's the thing. I'm glad you say that's lovely to hear because here's the thing that sucks about it. I look at your birth chart. We looked at the second house for your personal finances, right? We have Leo on the second-house cusp. So we look to the ruling planet, which is the Sun. So you've got the Sun in Aquarius square to Pluto. So I say you could have a lot of money, and there is a part of you, what with that Sun/Pluto square, that's like, "Fuck yeah. I want a lot of money." And then I'm willing to wager that there is a part of you that says, "No. I do not want a lot of money. Having a lot of money is bad. People who have a lot of money are bad," or something to that effect. Does that make sense?

Danielle: It makes sense what I did feel—the next thing that came to mind was, yeah, it was definitely a, "Oh, it's not for me." It's not like I want a whole lot of money for me. It's like I have big visions; I want to reroute the money. I want the money to be able to experience healing and being utilized and being decolonized—being utilized in ways that are actually beneficial to the land and not extractive. I want us all to experience this new relationship with money. So that's where I go. I'm like, "I want—yes. If that's possible, that's amazing." And it's not for me, though.

[crosstalk]

Jessica: Right. Okay. So let's stay with that. Let's stay with that because in an analytical way, what you're saying is great. When we're thinking about it in the context of social justice, what you're saying is my dream. I love it. But when we actually look at your money issues, the problem is I say you can have a lot of money, and you're like, "Sure, but it's not for me." And that is a distancing, and it is a kind of embodiment of, "It's not for me." And yes, there are so many great reasons why you're saying it's not for you, and I don't want to take that from you.

But I want to stay with if the first thoughts or feelings that emerge are distancing yourself from the ownership of it, now we're back to that thing I mentioned of the Sun/Pluto square, which is stewardship. If you make money, if you manifest money, if you earn money, if you fall into money, whatever it is, it is yours to steward. So it's yours is part of that sentence. So what you intended to do in your stewardship of that money is the next chapter of this book.

I want to say keep this into its own unique chapter of your willingness and ability to manifest, hold, and steward and to trust that you have the capacity to make that kind of consideration because so much of what we see is people manifest money, and they decide that they are very good at being the steward of money, and then I don't think they're great at it. Maybe you don't think they're great at it. And so there's like a hubris of, "Well, I should command a lot, and I should be able to do whatever I want with it. I know that I'll make good choices."

And this is what I was kind of getting at, which is I say to you that I see in your chart that you can make a lot of money, and that Sun/Pluto square gets triggered by that because of a fear of abusing power, a fear of shining too brightly. Being too successful is like the tails of the coin of not shining brightly enough and not being successful enough. It's heads/tails, same coin. So I want to give you the homework to practice making really simple statements of, "I want to manifest a lot of money," or whatever. It doesn't have to be that specific statement, but practice being in alignment or recognizing where you're not in alignment with ownership because money—you have to own the money in order to spend the money and make the good choices with the money. Does this make sense?

Danielle: Yes.

Jessica: What comes up around it?

Danielle: The crushing reality of poverty.

Jessica: Yeah. Yeah.

Danielle: And relief because I was totally doing the "The most difficult thing is going to be the most effective thing," and it's relieving to be reminded that's not true.

Jessica: Yeah. It's not. If I can—and please tell me if this is right, but as I was just saying what I was saying and I was looking at you energetically, what I was seeing is that your brain stayed online 100 percent—you know, talk, talk, talk, brain. But energetically, it felt like you were kind of pulling into a deeper part of yourself, kind of pulling back, in a way, and pulling into yourself. Does that make sense to you?

Danielle: Yeah.

Jessica: So I want to stay with that for a moment. There is this thing around power and having power and using power that pretty much all of your chart is not super comfortable with, but your Sun/Pluto square demands. It kind of demands. So it's a difficult thing for you because what I'm talking about is not just spiritually aligning with the concept of money or building a business and a life around being in community and supporting people using your resources in a way that holds people up and not pushes them down—all of that, you and I could talk about for hours and have a really interesting conversation about it. But I think you've had those conversations a lot with yourself and with others.

The thing that I'm kind of seeing here is your own issues, whether it's fear, resistance, judgments, whatever it is, with being in power and misusing that power or having that power turned against you. It's like the more you have, the more you have to lose kind of thing. Does that resonate?

Danielle: It does. Yeah, it does. I mean, I think about shame-based teachings and culture and Catholic school upbringing. And then I think about, yeah, just always being in a world where I understood that power and authority—or I saw power and authority being something that is not for me, and not in an open and collectively visible way, not in an easily accessible way.

Jessica: Yeah. That makes sense. So what I want to bring you into, then, is understanding that you coming into your own alignment with your ability and willingness to manifest abundance for your community but for yourself—for yourself—being in alignment with that is breaking through all manner of shit, obviously, but it's also encircled within your service. Does this make sense?

Danielle: Yeah.

Jessica: It's because all of this Piscean stuff in your chart—just doing it for yourself is really challenging. And when I just named doing it just for yourself, you kind of were like, "Yeah, but so that I can use it for others." That said, when you see other people that you can personally identify with who have made money for themselves and are doing good with that money, that's like a fucking revelation. That's incredibly powerful.

So remembering those models and allowing yourself to step into a space where you can be that model for someone else, that's going to make it a lot easier for you to manifest than being fixated on, "I don't want it for me; I want it for someone else," because wanting it for you is its own form of activism. It's really important. And also, on a spiritual level, it's kind of foundational to not just having money flow but to stay in your pool because you've had money flow towards you, and then it just pops out of the pool.

Danielle: Yeah.

Jessica: So you need it to stay by being aligned with it. So, my dear, we're talking about a lot of things. We're talking a little bit about the pragmatics, a lot about the spiritual. I want to see if you have any questions or if there's anything I didn't get to, anything like that.

Danielle: Our goal is to open on August 1st Temple of Earth. Hopefully we'll have the keys by July 1st and spend the first month building up the space and—

Jessica: So you have a space.

Danielle: Yeah, we do. We have a space.

Jessica: Say the address of the space.

Danielle: 1757 Alcatraz in Berkeley.

Jessica: Oh, that's such a cute space. It's such hippie vibes.

Danielle: It is. Totally.

Jessica: So, when I look at the space energetically, it does need work, eh, to convert it into what you need it to be?

Danielle: Yes. There are aesthetic changes.

Jessica: There might be something you end up doing with one of the bathrooms or that you need to do with one of the bathrooms. It looks like there's some time and some money that'll need to go into the space. And so I don't know if you have any people in the team who are good at that kind of stuff, but I would definitely—

Danielle: Mm-hmm. I have a carpenter who I was dating [indiscernible 00:36:48], who's, yeah, been helping a lot.

Jessica: And are they willing to continue to help with this stuff?

Danielle: It appears so.

Jessica: What's their name?

Danielle: [redacted]

Jessica: I mean, nothing's free.

Danielle: It's all connected to my love situation.

Jessica: I know. I'm seeing that. It's like this does not look uncomplicated.

Danielle: Yeah.

Jessica: But it does look like they're willing to help at this moment. I mean, I feel like that could change, but it feels like they're willing to help. And so that's really good. The space—okay. The space that I'm looking at energetically is a good one for your business. It needs a ton of energy clearing before you start to do work in it. So I'm assuming you already have that planned, eh?

Danielle: Yes. Yes. I have definitely been feeling that way, and I've had a lot of folks step forward and offer to help with that, too.

Jessica: Great. I'm so glad to hear that. I would recommend you taking the time leading up to when you get the keys to think about what kind of money, magic, energy flow, manifestation, intention you want to place within the space, and to think of it as not just doing it for you in your relationship to the business, because obviously I think you're already planning on doing that and you're already doing that, but to do it for the physical space so that she herself is a place where abundance lives, and so when people come into the space, they are in the space of abundance and flow.

And I think that, again, doing this, bringing a little more juj and ease and playfulness to the money component of this, will really help you. It'll really help you. And it's something that you can tweak over the course of time. Like if you have a shit month financially, you might need to really tweak it. Hold on. And are you working within a collective?

Danielle: Yes.

Jessica: How many people are in that group?

Danielle: Well, right now, it's a group of volunteers. There's like three, four people who've been really showing up to everything and really, really helping. And then there's formal volunteers who offered formally to volunteer. There is, I think, eight. But then there's a lot of community—

Jessica: Okay. Great.

Danielle: —and folks who've been in this visioning with me for years.

Jessica: So the four people—I'm seeing four or five that it looks like—so I don't know if I'm seeing practitioners that you're going to be working with or what exactly it is that I'm seeing here. Have you ever managed people?

Danielle: Yes, I have.

Jessica: Okay. Are you comfortable with it?

Danielle: Yes and no. I mean, I used to be a classroom teacher. I can really naturally manage people. I lean on transparency and vulnerability, and discipline isn't my favorite thing.

Jessica: Yeah. Yeah. Especially with adults.

Danielle: But I'm actually really, really good at it—

Jessica: Okay. Great.

Danielle: —because I can, yeah, talk to people's hearts.

Jessica: So what I want to encourage you to do—and this is very Capricorn shit here, so bear with me. But you have a Descendant in Capricorn. So what I want to encourage you to do before doors open is to just write out a few notes somewhere of what it is that you're offering and what it is that you require from colleagues, people using the space in a particular way, people who work for you, whatever it is. I call it rights and responsibilities list, the R&R, so that it's not personal to the people you're dealing with in the situations you're in, but instead you're coming up with kind of a, "This is how this business is run. And just so you know, I'm always going to do X for you, but I'm going to require you to do Y. And if that doesn't work for you, we can talk about that before you begin"—something to deemphasize the difficult parts and kind of lead with not just your heart but organization, because again, a lot of Pisces up there at the top of your chart. So you do need to lead with a bit more organization than is completely comfortable.

I would also say that those are great conversations to begin in email so that you can copy and paste things whenever new people come on board. Again, it's not so personal. What happens after those agreements are made, that can be personal. But the initial establishing "This is what I'm offering; this is what I'm requiring" isn't personal, and it needs to not be personal, hence email. Also, email is more litigious, and you're running a business, and you're the one who's paying the rent. So you do have to do that. Again, your Sun/Pluto square cringes, but here we are.

Danielle: Yes. I had intended to do—I was thinking of a way more complicated system, but yeah. That's great.

Jessica: And this is a really great—I'm so glad that we got to this because I think that the harder things are for you and the more annoying the task is, your tendency is to make it much more complicated. Again, Pluto is just like, if it's complicated, it's deep. If it's complicated, it'll work. But that's not inherently true at all. It can be simple and easy for you to execute and be more impactful. When you deal with the essential, most important thing and you don't allow lots of other distractions to exist, you can just be more impactful.

Danielle: Yes.

Jessica: That's the thing. So this brings me to the final thing I want to name, which is that you have Neptune conjunct the Midheaven right now. It's a two-year-long transit. The opening your dream business during this transit is not super uncommon. The real risk here is that Neptune always teaches us boundaries. And with what you're doing, you're going to need a bazillion boundaries in a bazillion ways, right? And so I do want to encourage you to cover your ass financially and in all ways. It is actually your spiritual lesson at this time. I cannot stress the importance enough.

And if a risk—a financial risk—feels too great to take, don't take it. Luckily, you've got really good intuition. But it's about slowing down to receive that intuition so you can decipher your intuition from your impulse, which is not as reliable.

Danielle: Yes.

Jessica: Within that—bear with me. Say the name of your business one more time.

Danielle: Temple of Earth Apothecary.

Jessica: Do you have a business plan?

Danielle: Yes, I do. It's somewhat rough. The financial projections could be more specific.

Jessica: Have you asked for help on this?

Danielle: Yes.

Jessica: Okay. And have you gotten good help?

Danielle: I need more help.

Jessica: I think so too. And the kind of person you need help from is somebody who keeps things really simple. Lean into your Capricorn's Ascendant here. You're set with the Virgo vibes. You need the Cap vibes on this one, or Taurean vibes, although I think Taurus energy is a little harder for you as an Aquarius. So you would have the easiest time, honestly, with Capricorn vibes on this one, somebody who can just be structured, just to give you a structure. That's what you need help with. You're good at filling it in. You'll overfill it. But you need a little help with the simplifying and making more efficient your structures.

So that's the thing I would point you towards there because when I look at your business energetically, it's like I can see—you know how if you ever burn smoke in a space, the smoke will—and you burn a ton of it, it'll fill up the space from the middle of the room up to the ceiling, but it won't go below; it only goes above?

Danielle: Mm-hmm.

Jessica: That's what the business looks like. You have all these great ideas from the waist up, but I'm not seeing as much of that nitty-gritty, annoying—like the roots aren't—they're not down, if that makes sense.

Danielle: Yes. I mean, I also feel it energetically that way.

Jessica: Yeah. So all to say—oh, okay. This actually might help you because you draw, yeah?

Danielle: Yes, I do.

Jessica: Okay. So I'm interested—and could you pick a plant that feels appropriate, draw it from the top of its petals—or whatever; leaves—down to—like draw the roots? And then, from there, kind of family-tree it. Make a diagram of, okay, so the making of the money, the building of the community is all the flower petals. It's like the fruit, the leaves, whatever it is. And then the roots are what no one can really see. It's beneath the surface. It's the infrastructure of your business. It's your finances. It's your ability and willingness to save money, not to hoard it, but so that you can be safe, so that you can be abundant, so that you can invest in things as they emerge.

So naming—kind of connecting it to a plant might really help to align you energetically and, again, make it both spiritual but also keep you locked into the material. Does that seem like something you could work with?

Danielle: Yeah. Definitely. I'll do that.

Jessica: Great. Good. And if you have somebody who's the right kind of person, which—maybe it's a unicorn, but somebody who can help you create a structure, acknowledging that you're a very visual processor and you need a structure that works with your flower point, basically. That could really help you. It needs to remain somewhat playful and always pretty spiritual, but that doesn't mean not materially resourced and structured and dependable. They can be married for you, and I think that that's where your success really will kind of be abundant. It's where you will be abundant.

Okay. Those are the things that I felt really called to say. Again, I'm going to ask one last time, did we nail everything? Do you have a final question?

Danielle: The energetic exercises—I will do them, and what I'm feeling most grateful for from them right now is calling attention to the need for me to merge the big, beautiful visions, which is where I like to reside, with the nitty-gritty, which I do and know I need to do, but it's a very different me and it's a very different part of me that engages with that.

Jessica: Part of doing the spiritual work—because that's really what we're focused on in our conversation today. Part of doing the spiritual work is about acknowledging that you're not trying to control outcomes; it's more that you're trying to align yourself with your highest truth, with abundance, with highest service. And life is really fucking hard. Life is hard now. We're still living through a pandemic. There's a million things going on. But I do think that for you—hold on. Let me just ground this.

Your energy soars up, and you're like, "I can manifest all these magical, amazing things. I can revision how the world can be. I can bring people together. Yes. Fucking yes, yes, yes, yes, yes." And then it kind of—it crashes down and is easily weighted by the omnipresent realities of this world and of life and of your life. And so, first of all, I want to just acknowledge that that is part of what's happening here. Does that make sense?

Danielle: Yes, 1,000 percent.

Jessica: Yeah. Some of that is just how you feel, right? And it doesn't need to change. I mean, it's not awesome when it feels like shit, and it's wonderful when it feels great. But some of that is just you're in life, and this is how it feels. And so how do you support, tend to, and care for yourself? How will you ask for care from others around the feels? Again, you're a double Cancer, so this is not news to you that you have a lot of emotions, and you'll deal with them.

But the part that I want to focus on is recognizing that when we're doing manifestation work and we're trying to get into alignment with ourselves, most of us do what we're talking about here. We either are in a state of, "Yes, I know I can create this. This is going to be magic," or, "No. Reality is too hard. I'm too far from my goals. I don't have the energy to do it." We tend to be in the high yes or the low no.

Danielle: I have been feeling like I'm in the middle, and I'm bringing them—I'm in the wholeness of it all, and I'm—when things are materially really hard, I still miraculously am feeling tapped into trust. And that's been, over the last few years, more and more and more the experience. But there are these two extremes for sure.

Jessica: Yeah. And so that thing that you're talking about—even your energy as you just said this, it came back up. And this is not necessarily true for all people at all times, but this is you. This is what's true for you. When you remember that you are a spiritual being and you actually have spiritual resources and that you're connected to the largeness of life, like a larger picture—nature, spirituality, however it frames for you—you have your energy back. So you don't always feel better all the time, but you feel more whole and more yourself.

The key here is—and I see this for you as a wave, like an ocean wave, a big ocean wave. So this metaphor that I'm going to use is not perfect because it's very oceanic for you. But what you need is a bridge or a ladder between the low, low, low and the high, high, high because otherwise you're just going to kind of crash and ebb and flow and crash and ebb and flow. And it's exhausting. I mean, you don't need that.

I think for you it is simple spiritual reminders, so easy mantras—not complicated ones you have to read—ways of doing a reset to connect with your guidance, and you can use, of course, plant medicines or whatever as a way to do that as well. You have so many resources, I feel like I don't really need to tell you what to do. You have so many resources.

But it's about automating and having three to five that you routinely pull from, not twelve. Twelve is too many. You won't remember it. Five is pushing it. Three to five, I feel like, is the sweet spot where you've got some variety, but not so many options that you're like, "I don't know what to do in this moment." You need it to be super fucking easy and automatic so when you start to hit that low, you can be like, "Okay, well, these are my emotions. And also, I've lost a sense of connection to my guidance."

Danielle: Yes. Yeah. A gratitude practice has been really, really helpful, like writing gratitudes at the end of the day.

Jessica: Great. And within that, it is easy to be grateful for that which we have evidence for. You've got $5 in your pocket; you can be grateful for those $5. It's not that hard. I mean, it's not always that easy, but it's not that hard. What's truly challenging is to be in a state of receptivity and abundance when you literally don't have abundance, when you materially look around and you have struggle. And I'm not a fan of being like, "Just align with it, and it'll come." Even though in some ways that's what I'm saying, I don't really think pretending that shit isn't shitty is a great strategy for anything.

But I think that for you, your energy is so affected by how you feel, and you have a way that when you start to resonate with that low, with the lack of evidence of things working, you start manifesting very quickly more evidence of what isn't working. It's something to explore because what can shift there is the narrative that you tell yourself in the moments that you're overwhelmed with emotion. By shifting that narrative, you're just taking care of yourself.

And I'm not saying tell yourself you have abundance when you don't have abundance—because that's ridiculous—but instead to say, "Right now, I'm struggling, and I know I'm on this larger path. And I have greater resources than that which I can see. And I'm going to stay with that, with the uncertainty of what comes next could just as easily be positive as negative." Whatever it is. I'm giving you a script. It's not a great one. But you can play with this.

Keeping it simple is really valuable for you. But also, recognizing where your energy goes and how narratives follow the energy is really helpful for integrating your spiritual practices into mundane, boring, annoying life, which I think is very effective for you—not for everybody. But again, for you, this really works, which makes sense because you're building a spiritual business and your life is really a spiritual path.

Danielle: I appreciate all of this, all of these tools and tips. I'm excited to listen again and not overdo and not overcomplicate.

Jessica: Don't be mean to yourself if you forget this, because you'll for sure forget this. Again, Sun square Pluto, it's kind of your birthright to forget, not to overcomplicate things. You just want to gently reset, bring yourself back. "How can I be a good steward of this energy?" Make that a question you return to. It'll help because you're great at being a steward of energy when you set that intention. That's your jam.

Supporting local abortion funds that help arrange and pay for abortion care for patients who need it is one of the most impactful actions you can take for reproductive justice today. Planned Parenthood is great, of course, but also consider donating to the Yellowhammer Fund, Mississippi Reproductive Freedom Fund, and Margins: Women Helping Black Women. The links for all three of these orgs are in show notes. If you or someone you know is a pilot, you can consider becoming a volunteer with elevatedaccess.org to help transport passengers at no cost to them to access gender-affirming and abortion healthcare. And finally, the Church of Prismatic Light is a religion for LGBTQIA+ people and allies who want religious freedom to have the right to bodily autonomy, marry who they love, transition, and have gender-affirming care. You can find them at prismaticlightchurch.org.

We've got a lot to talk about in this week's horoscope, but I would be remiss if I said nothing about the world, because of course it is Eclipse season. Things are really activated in terms of how we feel. And what we do and don't do, how we respond to what's happening, is very consequential individually and as a collective. We are going through the Pluto Return of the United States. We are also going through a whole host of things that describe global conditions. But part of the Pluto Return of the United States has to do with how we show up on the international stage, how other nations feel about us, how we have impacted other nations over the course of time, and how we are continuing to participate as a nation. So there's a lot in there.

I don't want to focus on the world too much, because there's too much emotional astrology going on this particular week. But I do feel that I have to say this. In the United States, we have had equal taxation without equal representation, which is patently undemocratic, for the whole time that this nation has existed. It is absolutely 100 percent not democratic to deny people body autonomy. It's a form of violence. The U.S. government and so much in United States media is discussing calmly the hate crime that the United States government is seeking to perpetrate against more than 50 percent of the population. This is outrageous. This is shocking. But it's not even remotely surprising, and it's not new.

If you are outraged, if you are heartbroken, these things are very normal and healthy responses. But I want to urge you to pair it with action. And if you are new to activism and don't really know what to do, I will say what I have said a million times on the podcast, which is fall in line. Find people and organizations that are already making change, that are already in the movement. You do not need to invent the wheel here. It's already been invented. Get behind people who are leading movements, who are community builders, and support them in any way that you can.

The thing about Pluto in this particular transit is it confronts us with our survival mechanisms, our fears around whether or not we'll survive, whether or not we'll be safe. And when we're in our flight-or-fight mechanisms, when we're in Plutonian vibes, is when we tend to show our ass. And that's because when you feel personally threatened is when most of us in most situations feel most entitled to do shitty things or selfish things because we're so terrified, because we're scared. And as individuals, this is true. And as a collective, this is true. That's why mobs are dangerous, because fear can be quite contagious, just like hate. So make sure that the ways in which you are responding to your reactions are in alignment with the building of the world that you want to be living in.

This Pluto Return was always going to be scary, and it was always going to be violent. We all knew that. Anyone who's been listening to Ghost of a Podcast or following astrologers who talk about the Pluto Return, we all knew that. So, instead of freaking out—"Could this possibly be happening?"—or catastrophizing and saying, "This is the apocalypse. It's the end of days"— instead of these things, which are perfectly reasonable emotional responses but they're not actually that helpful, do your best to identify, "This is what's happening. Can I accept that this is what's happening? Not consent, but can I accept that this is what's happening?"

And if the answer becomes yes, then you can say, "All right. Then what actions will I take? What can I do, and not just do for me—what can I do for us?" because when our thinking, when our coalitions, when our actions are not intersectional, when they are not inclusive of many different kinds of bodies and lived experiences, they either fail or are just inherently unfair and therefore not effective. So we've got to deal with that and deal with that in our own ways as individuals, but also, we need to come together as a collective to deal with that. And that's a huge part of the Pluto Return, my loves. That's where we are. Wringing of the hands, there is a time and a place for it. But if we spend too much time in that place, it's a missed opportunity.

Okay. So let's get into your horoscope. This week, as you know, Mercury is Retrograde. It went Retrograde on the 10th. How's it been going? Have you noticed any technical problems? I have. I feel like there's a lot of technical problems. This is kind of a messy Mercury Retrograde. And for some people, that's going to feel extra emo. I mean, it's an Eclipse Season, so there's that as well. But this particular Mercury Retrograde can have people feeling emotional, especially if you get easily flustered by things going sideways or not according to plan.

There's a way that miscommunications and misunderstandings during this Mercury Retrograde can really trigger identity issues. And so this is a really important time to stay connected to the rule of re's and to continue to do the introspective work of reviewing—not replaying, just reviewing—so that you can recalibrate in the ways that are necessary. And you don't need anything to happen quickly, but you do want to be kind of oriented in that direction. So that's just a fancy reminder. It's Mercury Retrograde. It's a pain in the ass and a great opportunity to get to know yourself better and to make internal shifts that will help your life get better, even if not in the short term, because just because you're doing the inner work doesn't mean Mercury Retrograde magically goes away.

And that brings us, my loves, to the first very important to transit to talk about, and that's the damn Eclipse. On the 15th, as you know, we have a Lunar Eclipse in Scorpio at 9:14 p.m. Pacific Time. And as always, if you are interested in tracking the transits on your own, I do want you to check out Astrology For Days at astrologyfordays.com. It's my web-based transit-tracking app, and it allows you to, amongst many other things, adjust the time zone so you know exactly what time transits are happening where you live or where you're traveling to.

So this Eclipse is happening 9:14 p.m. Pacific, May 15th, and there's a lot to say. So let's start at the beginning. A Lunar Eclipse happens on a Full Moon. It is a Full Moon that instead of only impacting us for about a month, the effects of it play out over the course of six months. So it's a much bigger deal than just a regular Full Moon event. And it's in Scorpio. We've got the Moon at 25 degrees of Scorpio and the Sun at 25 degrees of Taurus. And so the tension between the Moon in Scorpio and the Sun in Taurus has so much to do with intensity. Scorpio just wants to be able to feel what it feels in a deep way and to be able to do whatever it wants around that.

So, again, we're talking about a couple of fixed signs here. But the energies of Scorpio are, "I want to be able to retreat if I need to retreat. I want to be intense with you and I want to go deep with you if that's what I need." And then Taurus is a lot more diplomatic. It's much more people-pleasing. And so the tension between what I feel I need and how I feel I must behave is a big theme with this chart. Now, let's add to that that the North Node is conjoined the Sun. The North Node is at 22 degrees of Taurus, while the Sun is at 25. So it's not exact, but it's quite tight. And this intensifies the need for releasing. And when I say releasing, this could play out in a lot of different ways for different people. It may be releasing the need to be liked or to be easy or digestible for other people. It may mean needing to release your attachment to identity in some way, in some way that's actually holding you back or that you've outgrown.

Now, the fact that the South Node is conjoined to the Moon is absolutely worth noting because it means going deep into those Scorpio energies, in other words, the shadow side of Scorpio. We're talking about resentment. We're talking about pettiness. We're talking about being punishing, self-harming, or harming others out of a "Fuck you" vibe or a petty vibe. We want to really be aware of those feelings, of those energies rippling through us if they do, and to the best of our ability make better choices. So we can't control our reactions. Our emotions are what they are. But we do have agency in how we respond to our reactions. It certainly doesn't always feel like it, but we do.

And so this is a really important component of this particular Lunar Eclipse. Let's add to that this square to Saturn—in other words, this T-square to Saturn—really intensifies that feeling of being confronted, confronted by circumstances, feeling limited by authorities, reality, obligation, that kind of stuff. Saturn is scarcity-minded by nature. And so, when we have an Eclipse or a Full Moon that is pointing towards Saturn, what's happening is that our scarcity-mindedness, our fears, our desire to fit in or to kind of be perceived as important and powerful—kind of heads or tails of that coin—get really intensified. And unfortunately, along with that can come depressiveness. Again, it's a scarcity-minded thing.

So a lot of people are going to be feeling really activated by this Eclipse. And within that, your circumstances may be doing a pretty good job of leaning on you. So we can look at the world and be like, "Yeah, all of our circumstances," or it might be very personal to you in your personal life. And in any case, again, I want to come back to responsibility, which is a boner-killer word for a lot of people, refers really to the ability to respond. That's what responsibility is. It's the ability to respond and to respond with maturity, with integrity, and consideration. That's what Saturn wants from us. And so that's a really important theme to keep track of this Eclipse season, and certainly on and around the 15th, because this Lunar Eclipse is happening on May 15th at 9:14 p.m. Pacific if you're on the East Coast, or if you're across le pond, then yeah, it's going to be happening on the 16th. You can figure that part out.

Okay. Coming back. There's a few other things that are really important to name, such as on this very day, we have a Sun sextile to Neptune that is exact. And that's in addition to the exact square between the Sun and Saturn. So the Moon, Sun, and Saturn are all exactly square to each other. The Sun is exactly sextile to Neptune. And we have an exact conjunction between Venus and Chiron in Aries. In addition to that, we've got a Mars/Neptune conjunction. It is not exact on this date. It is exact on the 17th, but it is very strong, and it is building towards the 17th. And so what's it all mean? I shall tell you.

The Sun sextile to Neptune is a lovely aspect in this chart that is letting us know that if we are willing and able to be empathetic, to be generous, to allow our spirituality—and that can be, for you, super woo, super religious; it can be more about the arts and creativity, nature—it doesn't have to be any one thing. No one version of spirituality is deemed better than another. But I digress. The Sun sextile to Neptune is a really good time for resourcing our spirituality, what gives us a legit sense of connection to that sense of more, sense of meaning. And the Sun is also sextile to Mars. Now, this transit is not exact on this day, but it's absolutely happening. And this is mobilizing. It's catalyzing and really useful for all this kind of harder energy.

The Venus/Chiron conjunction is a confrontation with our values, but again, our values in the context of wounding because it's Chiron. So you can see how this all makes sense in American politics with what is happening, with Roe v. Wade and the potential seemingly imminent loss of the right to privacy. This is an embodiment or articulation of our values as a nation, or our government's values for us, being inherently wounded and patriarchal because that's part of the Chiron story.

On a personal level, this is an opportunity—I mean, albeit an uncomfortable one—but this is an opportunity to get present with what isn't working, whether it's in your own behavior, your attitudes, your life, your choices, whatever it is—to be able to align with that so that you can determine what, if anything, needs to be done around it. And this isn't the time for action. Again, Eclipses are not when we do major actions, ideally—certainly not major spiritual actions. If you're a person who does basic spiritual maintenance as just your lifestyle, continue. Do as you were.

But when we're talking about trying to manifest, control, direct, make happen, that's what we want to avoid during these Eclipses, and in particular this Eclipse, definitely avoid. Avoid button. Don't do it. This is not a time to make things happen or try to direct energy or contain energy. Certainly avoid consciousness-raising drugs or drugs in general if you can, and that is because of the Eclipse but also the Mars/Neptune conjunction. Bear with me. I'll get there.

Okay. Coming back to the Venus/Chiron conjunction, I want to just kind of acknowledge that Chiron only kicks up issues with things that are deep wounding, that come from systems, whether it's our family systems, our inherited conditions, or the systems of the society that we are living in or that we were reared in. It's deep shit, and it's difficult-to-deal-with stuff. Now, on top of it, it's a Full Moon in fucking Scorpio, and Saturn is involved. So there's a lot going on here—a lot going on here—that is likely to be very emotional, and it is not reliably what it seems.

This is a moment to really pay attention to the difference between a trigger and a trauma because when old traumas are triggered, it can feel as bad as the initial trauma felt. It can feel really terrible. But when a situation or a person is triggering us, that is very different than that person or situation harming us. Even though we feel bad, there's a massive difference. And it's not that it's less valid or less real. It's just a different thing, and it takes a different remediation. All to say this aspect, especially in the context of this Lunar Eclipse chart, is likely to kick up major tension both internally and potentially in your relationships, because it's Venus. Right?

Now, the next thing I want to speak to here is that Mars/Neptune conjunction. This is a difficult aspect. It's a difficult transit. And I'll talk about it a little bit more after the Lunar Eclipse chart, but in the context of this Lunar Eclipse chart, it is confusing and demoralizing and can lead to real defensiveness from people or a sense of demoralization. So we're going to have some people responding to this Eclipse in a really aggressive way, and others will experience it a lot more martyry and victimy. It may be, truly, that you are victimized or harmed in some way, or it may be that that's the trigger.

In either case, it may be difficult to identify where you begin and end, where your rights begin and end, or what to do about a trespass or what to do if you feel helpless or demoralized. It's a very difficult transit, and it's a difficult transit in the context of this particular Eclipse. And this bit of data is another level of expressing why this Eclipse is such a spiritual experience, because the Mars/Neptune conjunction are very much about spirituality and about the need to connect with something greater than one's ego. The Scorpio Full Moon, the Scorpio Eclipse—again, very deep spiritual/emotional content there.

But there's a real conflicting energy that we're dealing with, and that conflicting energy can intensify defensiveness. It can have us in our corners feeling so threatened and so at risk that we act out and we behave poorly. This is, again, where we show our ass. And so it's important to remember this Eclipse season and in general in these trying times that it is how we show up, it's how we behave in times of stress and struggle, when we are at risk, when we see that others are at risk, that defines us. It's easy to be generous when everything's going your way. And when you feel fucked up and when circumstances are fucked up is when it's most important to, but also often most difficult to, be generous and open-minded in your thinking, to embody your spiritual values in practice. When things are rough is a real challenge, but that's why we even pursue spirituality.

Whatever it is that's going on now is important. Whatever is going on in the world, whatever's going on in your personal life, it's all really important and consequential and will be kind of unraveling itself and playing itself out over the next six months. But the situations and the details themselves, as important as they are, in a way are not the thing to get too focused on. It's more how we show up emotionally because it's a Lunar event. So, really, again, make sure that you are doing your best to act from your wisest and healthiest places, especially when shit goes sideways. And sideways it may go.

Okay. Now let's go to our next exact transit. On the 17th, we have that Mars conjunction to Neptune in Pisces that I mentioned. So Mars is the planet that governs ego, and Neptune is egolessness. And so, when the two planets sit on top of each other, it's confusing. It's overwhelming. It can be exhausting. Literally, you may be feeling physically or psychologically exhausted or tired. And while it's exact on the 17th, we are feeling this all week, easily. This transit can create some sense of a hypersensitivity, or you might just be feeling touchy or a little, again, defensive, or you may be dealing with other people who are feeling this way.

It may be that you're feeling easily embarrassed or quick to tears around this transit. It's also very possible that you will idealize people and situations. This is a tricky dynamic. Unfortunately, in the larger context of what I've been talking about since I dropped the year-ahead horoscope—which, BTWs, if you haven't heard yet, is absolutely worth listening to—the religious extremism that Jupiter in Pisces tends to bring is intensified with this Mars/Neptune conjunction because when people have fixed religious beliefs, especially extreme religious beliefs, and then Mars comes and sits on top of Neptune, they feel this entitlement or this duty to take arms for what they believe in.

And the worst, the most atrocious of human behavior, has been defended by and emboldened by religion and religious beliefs. This is a really important time to make sure that your religious beliefs or your spiritual beliefs are not entitling you to think that you're better than other people or that your rights are more valid than other people. And I imagine we will see a lot of bullshit from religious extremists this week, and in particular on and around this date.

It is important if you are hooking up with other people—and I'm talking about sex—if you're hooking up with other people this week and certainly around this date, to have safer sex. Have safer sex. And I mean that in a physical way with all the things we know about all the ways that we can have safer sex, but also, I mean that spiritually, because the risk with this transit is that we idealize people and situations. We decide that they are perfect or that we're not good enough. Neptune has a really devotional way of loving and liking. And so, if you know somebody's not really good for you—they're not really healthy—this is not the time for a quick and easy hookup. Nothing's quick and easy this week, my loves. Nothing. So make sure that if you're doing a thing, that you're doing it in a way that is safe and healthy.

If this particular transit hits your birth chart directly, it can intensify allergies or sensitivities of the body. It can intensify a feeling, again, of exhaustion or demoralization, that kind of stuff. This is not forever. But if your energy is low, if your vitality feels low, that means it needs nurturance. This is a terrible—whenever we go through Neptune transits, global Neptune transits and especially Neptune transits to the birth chart, it's when we want to avoid fasting, any kind of fasting. We want to fortify the system. So this is a really powerful time for fortifying your body, fortifying your spirit, and fortifying your mind. If you can do things to fortify the world, if you have the energy for that, again, great timing for that.

Neptune is a planet that reiterates our interconnection, how we are all siblings are cousins. Mars is all about "me." It's like, "This is what I want. It's mine. Give it to me. I'm going to take that for me." But Neptune is like, "If it's mine, it's ours. If it's yours, it's ours. We are connected." So, again, it's a difficult couple of planets to have sitting on top of each other. And it might make you feel weird, or it might have other people acting weird. And you just want to not take it too personally, and support your system and your life to the best of your ability through this transit.

Now, on the 19th, we have another couple of transits worth naming. The first is Mercury Retrograde forming a sextile to Jupiter, and the next is a Sun trine to Pluto. Both of these transits are really lovely and fortifying. Now, they're overlapping with the Mars conjunction to Neptune and all this other intense energy that we're going through. But Sun trine to Pluto is strengthening. It can deepen your access to your own resiliency. It can put you in situations where you find that your identity is being validated or bolstered in some way, buoyed in some way. The Sun trine to Pluto is good for any kind of recovery work that you're doing, like any kind of recovery work, any kind of therapy, any exercise routine that is specifically pointed towards the promotion of your health.

This transit is great for flirting and starting projects and being engaged actively in whatever it is that you're doing. Sun trine Pluto is also a great transit for showing up more authentically or having difficult conversations. There's really no downside to this transit. It is lovely, and I'm so grateful to see it in the middle of all this mishigas. Ultimately, this transit is really good for positive or healing transformations. And they don't have to be big. They don't have to be dramatic in order to be important. Sometimes it is the most subtle or small shift that empowers deep and lasting changes. So don't be weird and hierarchical. This isn't a Saturn transit. Just go for authenticity and depth.

Now, the other exact transit we've got going on is Mercury Retrograde forming a sextile to Jupiter. This is great for introspection. So Mercury sextile to Jupiter is great for putting yourself out there, making connections, seeing the big picture, making plans. When Mercury is Retrograde, we shift that interpretation, and we shift it because Mercury wants us looking within. Mercury wants us following le rule of re's. I know I'm repeating it, but it's worth repeating. So the potential here is to apply all of that ability that Mercury sextile Jupiter brings to connect to the big picture, to have fun and be curious and adventurous, and to turn it inside.

So that might mean if you're going to hang out with a friend, do spiritual work together. Have real conversations. Share something. If it's an old friend, rejoice about the past, that kind of a thing. This is a great transit for any kind of Mercurial therapy, in other words, psychological work. It's just a great transit for psychological work. Honestly, so is the Sun trine to Pluto. Mars conjunction to Neptune, not so much. But truly, the fact that the Mars conjunct Neptune, the Lunar Eclipse—these things are happening at the same time as these other two transits is a good sign for our ability to make the most of the difficult parts of the transits that we are going through.

Mercury Retrograde sextile to Jupiter—honestly, if you're having a shit time, if you've just been kind of struggling, take a walk. If you can take a walk in nature or someplace that will specifically give you a view, that would be ideal. Jupiter loves a view. It loves a big-ass view. So you don't have to be around people. You don't have to interact with people. You don't have to talk to your therapist if those things don't sound fun or if they're not easy or whatever. There are so many ways to make the most of this energy. Honestly, you might just want to read a good book that day because even if it's a fun, fluffy piece of fiction, it might spark connections for you that are really deep and helpful.

That's the cool thing about Jupiter. It's not hard. It's kind of dynamic and synergistic. And so, when we see sextiles to and from Jupiter, it's often cause for excitement. Not always. Let's harken back to the Pluto/Jupiter sextile. But that's another story. This one is fan-fucking-tastic. On the 20th, it's Gemini season. Some shall rejoice. Others, they will moan, because people are people.

Okay. That brings us to the final transit of this week, and it is on the 21st. And the Sun forms a conjunction to Mercury Retrograde. So this transit has pros, and, my friends, it has cons. On the pro side, it is really good for, again, therapeutic self-investigation. It can be a good transit for having conversations with friends or people in your life about things that have already happened. So it's that kind of review part of the Mercury Retrograde. You know how they say during Mercury Retrograde that people can come back from your past? Honestly, I've seen on the internet for some reason that—expect exes to show up during Mercury Retrograde. That's a Venus Retrograde thing more than a Mercury Retrograde thing. Mercury governs friends, not lovers. But sure. Yes. People from your past.

So this may be a time where you really do encounter folks from your past or you just process things from the past with people. This is a great time for, again, introspection, self-reflection. If you're a writer, it's a great time for writing or editing if you have the energy for editing—though, again, a lot of this energy can be a bit distracting from editing. It's still a great transit for those things. The downside of this transit is that when the Sun and Mercury are conjoined, it is hard to separate one's ideas and attitudes from one's identity and sense of self. And this can lead to serious egoism.

So, technically, Mars governs the ego. But I am of the mind personally as an astrologer that in this world that we live in that's so digital, Mercury is more and more functioning in an egocentric way because I say I am eating a beautiful meal and I took a picture of it and posted it to social media; therefore, I am. So when the Sun and Mercury conjoin, what can happen is you take things really personally, even things that weren't said to you and aren't about you. It is possible that you will get into disagreements with people or that other people will get into disagreements with you because, again, we are so identified with our thoughts or with what we've said during this transit that we can take shit the wrong way. We can take shit personally. Things can go sideways.

The positive potential around that is that you can learn something, but in order to learn something, you have to be willing to learn something. Luckily, this is all happening in Gemini, which is a zodiac sign that is open to learning. It is naturally curious. Unfortunately, it's also pretty distractible. So, if you are having a difficult dynamic with someone else, my advice to you is to listen. Really listen. Listen to what other people have to say. Be curious, because that curiosity, if it's authentic, can help you to learn. And maybe what you learn is, "I don't fucking like this person." Learning doesn't always mean you like what you learn. But learning is really valuable. Being open is really valuable. And also, when you're authentically listening to someone else, it leaves a lot more room and energy for that other person to be motivated to really listen to you. Defensiveness tends to beget defensiveness.

So the Sun/Mercury Retrograde conjunction is definitely a transit to watch out for and to do your best to make the most of the astrological potential. And, my loves, that's this week's horoscope. Let me run through the transits one more time in case you're taking notes.

The first thing is we are still in a Mercury Retrograde. Hello, huzzah, and welcome. It's annoying. On the 15th, we've got an exact Lunar Eclipse, which is a Lunar Eclipse in Scorpio. We also have an exact square between the Sun and Saturn. We have an exact sextile between the Sun and Neptune. And Venus is exactly conjoined to Chiron. On the 17th, Mars is conjoined to Neptune. On the 19th, the Sun is trine to Pluto, and Mercury is sextile to Jupiter. The 20th is Gemini season. And then, finally, on the 21st, the Sun is conjoined to Mercury Retrograde.

Now, I will also say—because I know I talk fast—if you're like, "Why did she say that so fast?" don't forget that there's always transcripts for free uploaded on my website within 48 hours of each podcast drop, so you can refer back to those transcripts at your leisure. Also, I'm teaching a class, an astrology class called High Times and Addiction in the Birth Chart. Will I be talking about all forms of adult candy, how we can look astrologically at both addiction and recreational use, maintenance use, all that kind of good stuff? Yes. Yes, I will. I'm teaching this class at Astrology University. There will be a link for you to get your ticket in the show notes of this episode. It's also on my website. It's happening on June 4th, but if you can't show up live, no problem. You get the full download emailed to you. It'll be fun. It'll be cute. And you'll learn a lot. So put that in your pipe and smoke it.

As always, I want to thank you for being here and invite you to subscribe to the podcast if you haven't yet and to write a review or give it five stars wherever you listen to it, because those are the things that really do help all podcasts, but in particular independent podcasts like my own. And finally, I'll say join me on Patreon. Do we have fun? Yeah, we have fun. It's kind of my favorite place on the internet.

Stay safe, and do your best to be your best, even when you feel like garbage.

Talk to you next week.

Buh-bye.