Welcome to Ghost of a Podcast. I'm your host, Jessica Lanyadoo. I'm an astrologer, psychic medium, and animal communicator, and I'm going to give you your weekly horoscope and no-bullshit mystical advice for living your very best life.

Jessica: I'm very excited to welcome back somebody who got a reading on Ghost of a Podcast years ago, Episode 66. And you were anonymous when I answered your question before, so we're going to call you Anonymous 66 today. Welcome to the pod.

Anonymous 66: Thank you.

Jessica: I'm very excited to get to do this with you. Tell me what you want a reading about.

Anonymous 66: Okay. So this reading is an extension from that episode, and it's about romance. In that reading, you talked about my cycle, which was very true for me⁠—my cycle of being very attracted to avoidant and emotionally unavailable men, and my intuition becomes kind of cloudy and I'm unable to read the situation clearly because I'm feeling it too much. And then I will get burned and feel horrible, go through this thing, and then I will date a "safer" man, and then I'll lose my attraction really quickly. And then the cycle continues. I'm very sick of this cycle, and I'm mostly sick of myself in this cycle because I can get extremely obsessive and get into some very unhealthy dynamics. And yeah. That is what I want help with.

Jessica: That's great. Okay. And are you dating anyone currently?

Anonymous 66: Well, I just got dumped a week ago.

Jessica: I'm sorry. Was that by one of your good-at-sex-but-avoidant guys?

Anonymous 66: I would say he's avoidant.

Jessica: Avoidant, not good⁠—okay. We're not giving him that much credit. Okay. Cool.

Anonymous 66: I can't lie.

Jessica: No, no. We're not here to lie. We're not here to lie. Okay. And you only date cis guys, right?

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: Okay. So you were born September 15th, 1988, at 10:05 p.m. in the metropolis of Redmond, Washington. Let me start by asking you a couple questions. You're sick of yourself in this dynamic, loud and clear. But do you want a partnership?

Anonymous 66: That's a tricky question. Yes. Well, I do, yes, but a very specific kind of partnership, maybe not a very typical one. I'm kind of hesitating answering that because recently I did kind of open up to wanting a partnership, like maybe I do want romance back in my life again, because about four months previously, I was single and I was really happy about being single. And I don't think I've ever been happy about being single, if I'm honest with myself. It was great and surprising. So that's where that hesitation came from. So yeah.

Jessica: So⁠—okay.

Anonymous 66: Did I answer it?

Jessica: Yeah, you did. You did. And your answer was a little confusing, which is what I expected. So you're on target. So my question is, if you do want a partnership, why? Do you know why?

Anonymous 66: Well, I think some of it's for unhealthy reasons, like the security thing. Whenever a breakup happens, I go through, "Oh, but who will take care of me?" And it's like, what? I know that thought isn't logical, and I'm taking care of myself fine. But it's a weird go-to that my brain constantly goes to after a breakup. Well, and also, I love the beginning of a⁠—I mean the romance, the beginning. It's very intoxicating. I mean, it takes over my entire life, so I find it annoying, but it is intoxicating.

Jessica: So that's not an answer of why you'd want a partnership. That's an answer of why you'd want to date.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: So do you have any other⁠—and you don't have to, but do you have any other clarity points around why you would want to be partnered?

Anonymous 66: Hmm. I don't know. I've been in some long-term partnerships, and there are aspects of it I just really like. I just like the day-to-day stuff, like going on walks at night and making food together, getting groceries, just⁠—I don't know⁠—having someone to kind of bounce things off of. There is some comfort in that.

Jessica: Mm-hmm. Like a lifestyle bestie.

Anonymous 66: Yeah. Yeah.

Jessica: Okay. So what's really fascinating straight out of the gate is this question has been such a big deal to you you've reached out twice about it over the course of years, and you're not even sure why you want to be partnered other than reasons that you're a little bit like⁠—I mean, honestly, like a bestie. A bestie could much less drama satiate for you.

Anonymous 66: No one's ever asked me, which is⁠—it's such an obvious question, but no one's ever asked me. So I'm feeling a little stumped. Yeah. Of course, right?

Jessica: But this is the point. This is the point because I think⁠—and it's interesting because I relistened to the episode, and I was like, "Oh, I really spent a lot of time talking about the inherited trauma that straight women suffer through⁠—women who date cis guys suffer through, because there is all this inherited trauma, this ancestral trauma around being in the position of woman in that partnership. And I think an extension of that is how so many of us never question why we want the things we want. You didn't say you want to be partnered because you believe it'll make you happy. I mean, maybe that's implied, but that's not what you said. And that's interesting.

Anonymous 66: I don't think it will, necessarily.

Jessica: Okay. Okay. So now we're getting somewhere right away without even getting to answers. And I want to just kind of keep it slow because, hey, listen. You've got a beautiful Gemini Rising with a Jupiter conjunction to it, so keeping it slow is not your forte. It doesn't matter that you're a Virgo. It is not your forte. You like to move things fast. I'm going to probably keep it pulled back a fair amount. But straight out of the gate, asking questions about our assumptions about what we need and want, I think, is a life skill that all of us could use about everything that we struggle with and everything that we're successful with, but certainly with the struggles, because the struggles you have with men on some level do reflect your own ambiguity.

If you're not sure if you want to be partnered, then yeah, you're probably not going to pick guys that are sure they want partnership. If you're not really sure⁠—you're not convinced⁠—that you're going to be happy, then yeah, it's a real crapshoot whether or not you're going to prioritize choosing people based on their capacity to make you happy or that you're going to evaluate whether or not they get a third date with you based on whether or not they're making you happy. You're using other unconscious criteria.

And I'll say, throughout my practice, which is 28 years now, most of the time, the vast majority of the time that I've asked people, "Why do you want kids? Why do you want to be married? Why do you want to be partnered?" they tell me what you said: "That's the first time anyone has ever asked me that," which is bananas, like really bananas. But again, it's good information to have that part of what feels so out of control isn't that out of control, because you can cultivate clarity and self-awareness through asking the right questions. And so I want to just, before we get too lost in the sauce⁠—which we will; don't worry. Asking yourself the right questions is something I want to⁠—it's like a tool I want to hand to you that you take with you and you remember to use.

Anonymous 66: Absolutely. And I've heard you talk about asking that question to people who want kids, but I've never considered asking myself because it's like, well, everyone⁠—relationships are⁠—kids are a choice, but that's interesting. Something for me to think about.

Jessica: Especially if you're like, "Wow, I was really happy when I was single, and I don't actually expect a partnership with a man to make me happy." That's fucking fascinating. And I'm guessing in different moods, you might answer that question slightly differently. That's just normal human shit.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: But the thing that I think is really tricky here⁠—and I will break down the astrology of it for you in a moment, but the thing that I think is really tricky here is there is this part of you that abandons your own agency when you get engaged with stuff with dudes. And it's not that you're a wallflower, because I look at your chart. You've got that Jupiter conjunction to your Ascendant. You have a Moon/Pluto conjunction. You've got Mars in Aries, Venus in Leo, so you got a lot of personality. You got a lot of preferences. You can probably be big and loud and really fun and directive in your relationships. Is that correct?

Anonymous 66: Yes.

Jessica: Yeah. But there's doing that on surface-level things or details versus doing that for yourself from the inside out. And I think a lot of us get told⁠—a lot of women get told⁠—"Oh, you're being so pushy," or, "Oh, you're a lot." You have Jupiter on the Ascendant. You're a lot. Pluto/Moon conjunction, yeah, you're a lot.

Anonymous 66: Oh, I definitely try to mask or shrink myself in the beginning of something because I'm afraid of⁠—I've been told that I'm intimidating or scary, and so I try to just make myself⁠—

Jessica: Shrink it up.

Anonymous 66: Shrink it up. Yeah.

Jessica: So okay. Let me go straight there, then. So I'm probably not going to blow your mind by saying I think that's a terrible idea.

Anonymous 66: I think so, too. I don't know why I do it.

Jessica: Well, I mean, I do. It's because you date men. It's not just something you may have heard from the people that are directly in your life, but every bit of media you've ever consumed, especially as a child. It's a message we get in countless ways from countless sources, both intended conscious messages told to us and more subtle and unconscious messages. And the beautiful thing⁠—there are so many beautiful things about having a Jupiter/Ascendant conjunction, but one of them⁠—and are you quite tall? I can't tell by looking at you.

Anonymous 66: I was just talking about this yesterday. I said I look tall on the internet. I'm not, but people think I'm tall because I look tall from a computer. I'm 5'6".

Jessica: Oh. Okay.

Anonymous 66: I'm not short, but I'm not tall.

Jessica: Yeah. You're on the tall side of average.

Anonymous 66: Yes.

Jessica: Right? Is that right? I mean, I'm 5'2" and a half, so I think you're tall.

Anonymous 66: Thank you.

Jessica: You're welcome. But Jupiter on the Ascendant tends to make people tall or come across as tall. It's not about height. It's about having a big presence and big personality. Jupiter on the Ascendant⁠—you're like Tigger. You bounce and bound into a space. Will you knock things over? Maybe, but it's going to be weird and fun. Jupiter on the Ascendant is like that. And when you try to turn the light down on that brightness that is not just a huge part of you but a joyful part of you⁠— you're adventurous and weird and curious and all these great things⁠—then, A, you're not going to appeal to the guys who like you for who you are, and B, you're not going to like you, not as much as you could if you were being yourself.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: And we don't need astrology⁠—although we are happy to use it, but we don't need astrology to tell us that that's not going to lead you to happy union with men or with friends, with platonic relationships, although my guess is you do this significantly less with friendships. Is that right?

Anonymous 66: Yes. Yeah.

Jessica: Yeah. And as a result, my guess is you have very successful, though not completely drama-free all the time, but very successful friendships.

Anonymous 66: I do. It's funny. I mean, I did have to say goodbye to a lot of friendships in the pandemic, but that's a different thing.

Jessica: That's everyone. I mean, I think that's most people.

Anonymous 66: That is everyone. Yeah. It was for the better, not a tragedy.

Jessica: Having things become completely drama-free sometimes means they're not real. And I think there's nothing wrong with having drama at times. But the issues that you have in your dating life, your love life, partially come from you not being yourself and choosing people who like you for not being yourself.

Anonymous 66: Yikes.

Jessica: Yikes. It sucks.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: That is actually a good problem. It is a much better problem than the problem of people not liking you for who you are or even the problem of your picker being broken, which⁠—maybe it's a little busted, but I think part of why your picker is busted is because you're so focused on not being too much, not being too big, not being too intimidating. But I want to say fuck that. If you're not going to be emotionally present with your Scorpio Moon conjunct Pluto⁠—and it's a little wide, but because it's the Moon in Pluto, I'm giving it to you. If you're not going to show up intense and authentic, then once he starts dating you, he's going to freak out because eventually that Scorpio Moon is going to come out. And that's only a bad thing if you've misled them. Does this make sense?

Anonymous 66: 100 percent. The Scorpio Moon is the thing I'm most scared of in myself and to show other people. It feels like it's this boiling pot that's like, "Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh," and then I can feel it wants to explode, and I try to keep it to myself as much as possible. So I don't let it out to other people.

Jessica: Okay. Let's talk about it. So, in your birth chart, you have this Moon/Pluto conjunction in Scorpio in the sixth house intercepted. So let's talk about the intercepted part first. So, for anyone who's newer to the podcast, interceptions are when we have a full 30 degrees of a zodiac sign inside of a house, but it is not on the entry or exit cusp of that house. And in your birth chart, you have two signs intercepted in your sixth house and also your twelfth house, which is a lot. And what it means in human terms is that you were shown very, very clearly in no uncertain terms through the behavior of your parents or guardians that being intense would cost you more than you wanted to pay, that if you allowed your intensity emotionally and psychologically to show up through your behaviors, that you could be abandoned, punished, harmed. Does this make sense to you?

Anonymous 66: Yeah. Completely.

Jessica: And were you raised with both your parents?

Anonymous 66: No. I've never met my biological father. So just my mom. I mean, my grandma was very much a part of my life. And I have a stepdad, and he came along when I was five. So there were others involved. But yeah, I've never met my biological father.

Jessica: Was your mom in a relationship with him?

Anonymous 66: They were married. They were getting a divorce while she was pregnant with me. It was very intense. What I've been told was he had to have a psychological evaluation during the divorce process when she was pregnant with me, and he was diagnosed as a sociopath. So yeah.

Jessica: Just that one little bit of information makes a lot of sense because this Moon/Pluto conjunction does generally signify a powerful and heartbreaking loss anywhere from a year before birth until you were seven years old. So, whether or not there were others, this divorce would be one of them. But also, if your mother believes⁠—so we don't know what facts are because you weren't there and you don't have access to your biological father. But if your mother believes that your birth father had mental illness that was dangerous or unsafe, it would be probably pretty tempting for her to be hypervigilant and really constantly check you for signs of having mental illness and being too much and too intense yourself.

Anonymous 66: That actually was a problem. When I was two, I would throw terrible temper tantrums. It was apparently very scary, and they took me to a psychologist when I was two years old, which⁠—she never said this to me directly, but I knew later why she did that.

Jessica: Mm-hmm. And I would say the reason why you were throwing temper tantrums is because everything in your birth chart points to your mother repressed her anger. Your mother repressed all of her intense emotions. And any time anything got too intense or too real, she would shut it down. And so what you did is what all little kids do. You expressed what's not being expressed in the environment. And you didn't get tools for closure, and that is why they call the twos the terrible twos. It's because it's when kids find their no.

And if you were finding your no and your mother was shutting down and disassociating, then you were like, "I'll just be no louder. I'll just be no more aggressively," which is, I'm guessing, a theme that you carry out in your relationships when they get close enough today. But we'll pull back and we'll come back to that in a moment. But I want to just say you are in your early 30s. You just hit the end of your Christ year. And you are now old enough to have a fair amount of experience with your own mental health. Is that something you're still scared of?

Anonymous 66: Less. I have noticed that the 30s do kind of quell things a little bit. I feel like I'm not as capable to get to that extremely intense point, or if I am, it's very short-lived, and I'm able to kind of calm myself down [crosstalk].

Jessica: Great. And do you have a physical practice?

Anonymous 66: I walk a lot.

Jessica: Great. That's great. I'm sure these two things are connected for you because⁠—

Anonymous 66: Oh, definitely.

Jessica: Yeah. Having all these intercepted planets in your sixth house requires physical outlets, like habitual physical outlets. You also have Mars as the focal planet to a T-square. It's in the twelfth house, and it's intercepted. And so losing access to your body can make you feel really just⁠—I want to say disheveled, but that's the wrong word. It's all-over-the-place messy.

Anonymous 66: Yeah. Well, I actually sprained my ankle about six weeks ago or so, and I couldn't walk for two weeks. And I was such a baby. I was losing my mind. I knew that walking was important to me, but it was at that time I was like, "Oh no. This is essential for my mental health."

Jessica: Yeah. I'm sorry that happened, but in a way, I'm actually really happy for you that that happened because it showed you what happens when you don't engage with your body. The other thing is if you're going to be partnered with someone⁠—which I am not in any way convinced, based on your answer to my question about why you want to be partnered, that you should be. But if you're going to be partnered with someone, then he is going to experience you as a huge baby. He's going to experience you throwing temper tantrums. He's going to experience you being a dick. He's going to experience you being kind and being generous and being the more mature one, and everything in between those two examples.

In order to be in a real relationship, we need to be real. And sometimes we're really fucked up, and that's not just you and me. That's literally everybody. There is no birth chart without Pluto or Saturn or Mars or whatever else. And so, to stay focused on our inquiry here of "How do you get what you want in relationships? How do you find happiness?"⁠—and that is your question, right? Is that your question?

Anonymous 66: Yeah, it is. Yeah.

Jessica: I want to say this. If you really, truly want⁠—and I don't think you have the answer in this moment, and that's fine. But if what you truly want is to chase that beautiful Jupiter conjunction to your Ascendant around the world, having fun beginnings that are romantic, that are enveloping, that are adventurous, and then maybe it's a little easy come/easy go⁠—you realize it doesn't work; you get out. If you want to have those kinds of adventures throughout your life, then what you're doing isn't wrong. Then what you're doing is working, actually.

You're getting what you want, and I think it's really important that I say that, because you're clear that you want to have that fun romantic part. You're also getting what you want sometimes because what you want sometimes is security and stability. So you get that. And then this other part of you is like, "What about the adventure? Where's my endless romance?"

Anonymous 66: Completely.

Jessica: And so there's something really, again, for me, empowering about recognizing you're not clear about a lot, but the things you are clear about you're manifesting.

Anonymous 66: Yeah. No, that makes sense.

Jessica: Such a bummer, but it's also wonderful. It's both, right? It's both.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: And so here's where I'm going to give you some homework to think about what you actually want. There are a lot of ways of doing this. One way is you can go on some sort of platform like YouTube and watch videos of old people who have been together for 30 or more years⁠—I'm not talking about influencers on social media who have been together for seven years or five years. Not that that is a small amount of time⁠—it's a long amount of time. But I'm talking about people who are old, who have been doing it a lifetime, and listen to what they have to say. Listen to what they share⁠—the good, the bad, the ugly. Get your inspiration. Get your warnings. And see if that shifts your feelings because I think part of what you're caught up in the cycle of is endless summer. It's a youth-based concept, right? And do you not want human babies?

Anonymous 66: Oh, I feel mixed about that, truly. I don't have a clear answer on that. Sometimes, I'm like, "Oh, it sounds nice." It's not a logical thing, though. That's purely emotional. So yeah. Yeah. It's not a goal of mine, so I'm assuming it probably won't happen.

Jessica: I don't know. I mean, it's really easy to make a human baby. I don't want to blow your mind by the process, but it's really easy. I mean, not for everyone, but I just feel like famous last words. I wouldn't say that out loud too frequently, this "It probably won't happen," because⁠—I don't know, because⁠—it can, is what I'm saying.

Anonymous 66: Well, I think if I became pregnant, I would have a really hard time making the decision to have an abortion just because I feel like I would become emotionally attached very quickly, which is why I have an IUD, so I don't think about it or so I don't have to⁠—yeah.

Jessica: Yeah. The reason why I ask is only because the way that you're holding the topic of love is not the way that most people I talk to who are like, "I definitely want children," hold it because there's a time thing. But you don't have that time thing, which is a great blessing because as I'm talking about this endless summer approach to romance where you're just like, "I've got time. I can just play it out," it's not a bad idea because if you don't want to procreate, then whenever it happens, it happens. You've got time to figure it out.

Anonymous 66: I do love the endless summer, but with the endless summer comes constant winters. And that's the part that I don't like. I love falling in love. Who doesn't? Everyone loves falling in love. But I hate the endings. If they end quickly, it's usually their doing, and it feels like the rug is pulled out. And then I feel so hurt, so bruised, so stupid, like, "Was I reading it wrong?" I go over text messages like, "Wait. Was I crazy? Was this person in love with me two weeks ago?" That part I don't like, the crazy-making afterwards.

Jessica: Yeah. So we're back to Pluto Moon. So Moon in Scorpio, Moon conjunction to Pluto, detests endings⁠—really, truly detests endings. And it can have you holding on for long periods of time when you know you need to let go.

Anonymous 66: Oh yeah.

Jessica: That is a big issue, but to me, it's kind of at the bottom of the list of important things to work on. So it's on the list, but it's at the bottom, and the reason why is because you don't even know if you want to be partnered. You know you don't want to be hurt. You know you don't want it to end. But that's not the same as knowing that you want to be partnered. And if you don't want to be partnered or if you don't get clear about that, then yeah, if you date, things will end. That's the nature of dating⁠—not being in relationships, but doing what we're now going to call endless summer. There is no autumn. It is just winter afterwards.

And so okay. Cool. If you've decided⁠—which I will say as a psychic you have not decided, but let's pretend you've decided⁠—you don't want to do the endless summer, you absolutely are clear that you want a partnership, then all of the dating advice that we are given by magazines and such and thus, even though nobody really reads magazines anymore⁠—it doesn't work. And it doesn't work because for as long as you're pretending to be chill when you are in fact not chill, for as long as you're pretending to be small when you are in fact big and bright, then the only people that are going to really work with you are the people that don't like you for you. And I know it's the second time I've said it, but I feel like I need to say it ten times for you.

Anonymous 66: Yeah. Thank you.

Jessica: It's the thing. It's the thing. Let's do a little dive here. Say your full name and then the name of the person you just broke up with.

Anonymous 66: Okay. My full name is [redacted].

Jessica: Great.

Anonymous 66: And his full name is [redacted].

Jessica: You like him?

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: Huh. Why?

Anonymous 66: Oh gosh. I don't know. Chemistry. We had chemistry. He was really sweet. Oh God. It's hard to describe why you like someone.

Jessica: Okay. Let me ask you an easier question.

Anonymous 66: Okay.

Jessica: Did you feel happy in his presence consistently?

Anonymous 66: Yes.

Jessica: Okay.

Anonymous 66: I felt anxious around him, too.

Jessica: Yep. Did he meet your needs?

Anonymous 66: No.

Jessica: Okay. When you asserted a boundary, a need, or a preference, did he respond in a cool and kind way?

Anonymous 66: That's an interesting thing to ask. He presented as very boundaried. He had a lot of boundaries, which I really liked about him, I found really attractive. Here's a man with boundaries. Wow. But I did ask for one near the end. I asked for only one near the end of our relationship, and he completely broke it. And it was just one little thing.

Jessica: Yep.

Anonymous 66: So that sucked.

Jessica: The difference between rules and boundaries is hard to notice a lot of times. What I see about this dude is he had a lot of rules, and he maybe had a therapist or a parent who was a therapist, so he had really good ways of talking about things that made it seem like they were boundaries. But he actually was really ruly. And when you asserted a boundary, he did not have the tool set or the inclination to respect it.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: Okay. And he made you happy.

Anonymous 66: It was so new. It's hard to⁠—you know, it was just so⁠—

Jessica: I see.

Anonymous 66: Yeah. [crosstalk]

Jessica: You're in the juj phase.

Anonymous 66: Total juj.

Jessica: Okay. Okay. A.k.a. the summertime of your summertime fling.

Anonymous 66: Yes.

Jessica: So okay. Straight out of the gate⁠—this is the reason why I asked both of your names, so I could look at the situation energetically to see how you met with this guy⁠—and this was less than three months, yeah?

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: Yeah. So you met this guy. There was juj. There was chemistry. There was a sparkle. Yay. Summer is on. And so you were in. You were in. You just decided that you were going to do this thing, and you kind of gave him your trust and your enthusiasm without him having to do anything to earn those things. Is that correct?

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: Okay.

Anonymous 66: I'm feeling called out. Yes. It's very true.

Jessica: This is what we're here for. This is what we're here for.

Anonymous 66: Of course. Of course.

Jessica: And it's not like I feel like somebody should earn those things from you in a capitalistic way, like tit for tat, "You give me this; I'll give you that." Not at all. But yeah. With that beautiful Jupiter conjunction to the Ascendant, you're like, "I will leap in headfirst. It doesn't matter if there's water in the pool. I will swim." And when it comes to a pool belonging to a man, a cis man, that is⁠ a—I mean, doesn't matter the gender; that is a risky behavior. But it's extra risky in the waters you swim.

Anonymous 66: For real.

Jessica: For real. For real. But here's the thing. You went in headfirst before you knew him and before you knew whether or not he treated you with real kindness when it wasn't easy for him. And that's what I want you to really remember because I am personally of the mind that within the first three dates, it is essential to say no to the person you're going on a date with and to express a boundary to the person you're going on a date with. And I'm saying these are two separate things⁠—maybe there's overlap, but two separate things. And I'm not saying to make it up. But if you're going on date two, and they're like, "Hey, let's eat pizza," and you're like, "I could eat pizza. Who cares?" but you know you'd actually prefer to go out for some other kind of food, say no. Suggest something else because that instantly will show you something about how that person responds to you having a personality that is not tailored to support his happiness. That make sense?

Anonymous 66: Oh, totally. Yeah. And just the thought of me doing that, I'm like⁠—that would be hard, or even suggesting a different place to eat, which is telling. Yeah.

Jessica: Which is⁠—I mean, that says⁠—that's like a whole novel right there. That tells you a lot.

Anonymous 66: Yeah. It does.

Jessica: And it really supports you in understanding, hopefully, that there are really meaningful internal shifts that you can make that will radically change your dating life, like radically, because if you have to prove to someone that you're chill, you're easygoing, you're fun, you're down for whatever, which⁠—how many women feel the pressure to do this with men? If you're constantly proving that, then you're not present, you're not being authentic, and you're not letting him show you whether or not he deserves you, because somebody giving you summertime vibes is not equal to them being nice or good or compatible with you. It's only equal to them being good for you to hook up with.

And unfortunately for you, you've got Neptune right on the cusp of your eighth house from the seventh house and Capricorn on your eighth-house cusp. You also have your Sun in Virgo in the fifth house. So I don't know that hooking up without emotions is exactly your forte.

Anonymous 66: No, it's not.

Jessica: Yeah. I'm so sorry. It's a shame because honestly⁠—

Anonymous 66: It's annoying.

Jessica: ⁠—all other points of your personality point to you would be great at hit it and quit it and keep on moving, but your body doesn't work like that⁠—that Scorpio Moon. But more than anything, it's that Neptune in the eighth. There's nothing casual about sex for you, unfortunately. And what's worse is snuggling and sleeping in the same bed without hooking up. That's worse for you because you fall in love with⁠—kind of like you mentioned early on in our conversation⁠—holding hands, snuggling, waking up and having coffee. It's those little things that make you feel like, "We know each other. We trust each other. We're intimate."

Anonymous 66: I don't let people sleep over, and I don't sleep over at people's house for⁠—this recent man never stayed over. I never stayed over at his house.

Jessica: I'm very impressed to hear that. Congratulations. That's so healthy. So, when you do have sex, you still go home?

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: Great. Good for you. That's a very wise of you.

Anonymous 66: Thank you.

Jessica: Let me ask you another question.

Anonymous 66: Oh gosh.

Jessica: You don't have to answer it. Yeah.

Anonymous 66: I know what you're going to ask me next.

Jessica: Do you really? Do you think you can feel it coming?

Anonymous 66: I do.

Jessica: Is it about safer sex?

Anonymous 66: Yeah. That's exactly what I thought you were going to ask me.

Jessica: Okay. Cool. Yeah. You're right. So do you have safer sex with dudes?

Anonymous 66: No. And I'm actually pretty annoyed with myself around this because sometimes⁠, yeah, I wanted to, and then it feels like it was kind of put upon⁠—well, I mean, I have agency. I could have said no.

Jessica: Mm-hmm. It's very common for people who have Neptune in the eighth or in the fifth to not use condoms or have safer sex. And it's because you have a lesson to learn around boundaries. There are so many ways to learn that lesson. My hope for you is that you learn that lesson through an annoying conversation with a very dikey astrologer. That's my great hope for you because there's harder ways of learning that lesson, which⁠—

Anonymous 66: Oh yeah.

Jessica: You know what they are. You've heard of them. Again, it comes back to you not wanting to be too much makes you do things that are acts of self-abandonment. They're acts of not being a good friend to yourself. And what kind of romantic relationship can be healthy and flourish when they're built on that? Whether or not he's a bad guy or a good guy⁠—irrelevant. How can he be a guy who's right for you when you're not doing right by you? That's a meaningful part of the question.

So, already, we're making changes here. You're going to assert a boundary. You're going to find a cause to say no. And I want to encourage you to just have buckets of condoms in all your purses. And so, that way, if you do get lucky, you can be like, "Oh, no, no. Obviously, we're going to do this." And if he tries to talk you out of it, that's really valuable information for you to have, that somebody is willing to put your physical health at risk or disregard your boundaries for their pleasure.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: That's great information to have. And whether or not you think that's conclusive is good information for you to have about yourself. For me, that's conclusive. It's grounds for expulsion from the garden as far as I'm concerned. But I know a lot of people don't agree with me on that, and that's cool. But it's good information for you to have about yourself and the other person. And this is where I want to say to your Scorpio Moon there's no reason to judge yourself. I can feel you starting to get into a self-judging place about things you've done or how it sounds hard to have boundaries.

It's not valuable to judge yourself. It's only valuable to say to yourself, "This is information that I can use, and that doesn't mean I will always use it, because I'm a fucking person, and that's okay"⁠—giving yourself the space to be like, "Okay. I get so caught up in the emotions of the situation that I'm too close, and then I don't pull back and use that perspective to be like, 'Wait a minute. I'm pretending I think this is interesting. I'm fucking bored,' or, 'I'm pretending that I'm okay with something but I'm finding myself getting more and more agitated.'"

A meaningful part of this for you is protecting yourself from being too much and a fear of shutting someone else down or being left for being too much. If I were queen of the world, what I would have you do is first of all not fuck with non-monogamy, not fuck with polyamory⁠—you've got quite a monogamous chart.

Anonymous 66: Really?

Jessica: Yeah. Tell me more about that.

Anonymous 66: I feel very torn. Well, when I'm in a monogamous relationship, I can be happy, but I'm also⁠—I get squirrely sometimes. And I have some poly friends, and they have suggested, "Maybe you're poly, or maybe you're non-monogamous." I've never attempted that within a relationship. I've done other things. Just curious.

Jessica: So Jupiter on the Ascendant is squirrely. Jupiter on the Ascendant is⁠—

Anonymous 66: It sounds like a cheater placement.

Jessica: It is. I mean, it can be, yes. It can. I was going to say it more diplomatically. I was going to say, "I love eating meat and potatoes. These sausages are delicious, but I'm really interested in a quinoa salad. What can I do with a quinoa salad?" And it's a.k.a., yeah, cheating. Cheating can happen. That's not non-monogamy, and that's not polyamory.

Anonymous 66: No, it's not. Exactly.

Jessica: It's not. Non-monogamy and polyamory, in different ways from each other⁠—and for different people, it's different, of course⁠—but they require honest and forthright⁠ conversation and negotiation of boundaries, which I would not recommend as your go-to place for a relationship because that, as we've established, is so hard for you. It's hard for you to identify what you're even feeling or when you've abandoned yourself or left the room to be accommodating to others. And so I do not recommend, at this stage of your life, inviting that into your relationship dynamics, because you'd still need a stronger relationship to yourself.

That said, you have this thing that everyone born in your generation does, which is the Saturn/Uranus conjunction in Sagittarius. And the thing about this aspect⁠—and in your birth chart, it's in the seventh house, the house of intimate relationships. The thing about this aspect is it makes it so that it's a chronic struggle of, "Is this too much? Is this not enough? Should I come back? Should I grow? Should I gallop or should I have a seat?" It's really hard to gauge the difference between those things.

And also, you have a Neptune/Mars Square, as I mentioned before. This Neptune/Mars square makes it really hard for you to identify, locate, and act from your ego to be self-protective when you're scared of how it will impact other people. So, if you're talking to me and you're giving me advice, you've got great advice⁠—kick him in the nuts; run. You're cool with that. You've got a lot of big energy. But when it comes to taking care of yourself, it just doesn't occur to you. It's hard for you to access your Mars, your ego, because it's intercepted in your twelfth house. This makes sense, yeah?

Anonymous 66: Oh yeah. I feel like I can give great advice to my friends about how to assert themselves, but then I find myself like, "Why aren't you being a friend to yourself? Why aren't you telling yourself the same advice?"

Jessica: This is part of why I say polyamory/non-monogamy, not for now. And do you have a therapist?

Anonymous 66: No. It's been something that I've been meaning to do.

Jessica: I would recommend looking for a somatic therapist, somebody who will bring you back to awareness within your body of how you're feeling, because you can talk in circles around things and it doesn't really help you past a certain point. So all these intercepted signs and planets in your sixth and twelfth house indicate that a lot of your emotions get stuffed in the body. And so having a practitioner who can support you in locating your body is going to be really, really effective for you.

So this brings us back to early developmental issues, really. And I gotta ask. Do you want to know who your birth father is?

Anonymous 66: I know his name. I go back and forth, honestly. I've heard so many scary stories, and he was also kind of a bogeyman figure in my life. He was threatening to take me, and it was this whole drama. So I go back and forth. I'm curious about him, but sometimes I wonder if it's like, "Is it worth it?"

Jessica: So let me ask you a different question. Is your mom honest?

Anonymous 66: Oh. I mean, I believe that she is.

Jessica: I mean, you've known her for 33 years, so⁠—when she tells a story, it tends to be an accurate story?

Anonymous 66: Yeah. Yeah. That's what I think.

Jessica: Great. And I'm only asking this not because I secretly see that your mom is dishonest, but I'm asking this because I do see her terror that you are like your birth father around anger, mental illness, and intensity.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: And I see that she has shame around her terror, and that makes it worse for you, not better. Because I'm not looking at your mom's chart⁠—I'm looking at your chart⁠—the intensity of her repression around this stuff makes me wonder how reliable a storyteller she is when it comes to your father.

Anonymous 66: Oh. Interesting.

Jessica: I'm not encouraging you to get in touch with him. I'm not encouraging you to Google him and find out all the things. I'm not encouraging you to open that door. But I am encouraging you to again take a little bit of a step back to realize how much of a bogeyman he is, like how much of a figure in your psyche he is, of what might be wrong inside of you and how much that fear has been unconsciously but very aggressively been driving you in your life.

Anonymous 66: Oh. Yeah. Wow. No, that's real. I never considered that. Yeah, that's real.

Jessica: Yeah. It's not uncommon, when you have a parent who has a serious mental illness or who is abusive, to become scared of your own capacity to be abusive or your own capacity to lose yourself somewhere in your own psyche. You have found very effective ways of managing that, and they're only going to be effective for a very short period of time more in your life. And they're not really making you happy. Your mom kind of needed you to not be too much, and so you learned how to not be too much by repressing yourself.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: And it's brought you this far, but it's not working anymore. It's working, but it's not working. You know what I mean?

Anonymous 66: Oh yeah.

Jessica: Repression and assumption are kind of really big themes that are emerging in our conversation, right?

Anonymous 66: Yeah. Yeah.

Jessica: And so being willing to kind of explore your assumptions is valuable. Something to consider⁠—this is not exactly advice. I wouldn't recommend that you do this without a therapist that you trust that is in your life. But I wonder if it's valuable for you to be inquisitive about this man. You are not him. We are not our parents. You are not your father at all. And also, knowledge can be very empowering. This practice of evading things that are scary or intense, I think it's at the foundation of your struggle with getting into a relationship that actually works for you, if you even want that, which, again, we are not clear about yet.

But I think that that's a really important thing. If you become aware that you feel a sense of responsibility or guilt around who your father was, that's important for you to let go of because you are not responsible for that man. Coming from intensity, coming from trauma, does not mean anything about you other than that's your lived experience or your inherited experience. And it's not a value judgment on you. And there is this equation that you have around intensity and bad. The equation is⁠—first of all, I mean, you've done the math wrong. It's not true. And also, it's not making you happy, which brings me to something else really important in your birth chart.

You've got a Venus square to Pluto, and that Venus square to Pluto⁠—your parents' relationship basically is Venus square to Pluto. And your intense drive to be consumed by love and partnership, whether it's healthy or unhealthy, whether it's easy or not, is Venus square to Pluto. But also, Venus square to Pluto gives you the capacity, the energy, the potential to work really hard on yourself and your relationships so that you can achieve deepening levels of intimacy over the course of time.

It won't ever come through pretending that you're chill about something you're actually fucking intense about. It won't come from pretending that you consent to something that you really just want to scream and rip hair out of his head about. I imagine that there's actually a lot of screaming in your head and that there's a lot of ferocious⁠—

Anonymous 66: Well⁠—

Jessica: No?

Anonymous 66: No⁠—actually, can I ask you a question?

Jessica: Yeah. Hit me with it. Yes.

Anonymous 66: This is interesting. If I can use an example with this recent man that I was dating, there was one day he had to cancel like 45 minutes before we were supposed to meet up, and he said his friend was having a mental health crisis and they needed him. I totally understood, and I said that in the text message. I felt very intense about it, but I felt like I was triggered but he didn't do anything wrong. I'm not going to let him know how I feel about it because he didn't do anything wrong; that's not for him to deal with. This is for me to sit with and for me to deal with.

Jessica: Yeah.

Anonymous 66: But that was a moment of me being intense. I guess that's why I'm asking. It's like in this moment⁠—

Jessica: That's a great question.

Anonymous 66: Okay.

Jessica: Yeah. That was a good choice. That was a good choice. You're dating a guy. His friend has a mental health breakdown. You did not feel chill about it, but you behave what you have determined to be appropriately for the situation. So your emotional response was dramatic and intense: "He's abandoning me. He's fucking off, and he doesn't care about me." But your mind can look at the situation and be like, "That's a trigger, but the reality is he has a real crisis. That's healthy." But I'm willing to wager that there are many other times that came up where he had a rule, a.k.a. a boundary, a.k.a. a rule, or he didn't meet a need or he wasn't attentive to you in some sort of way, and you pretended it was okay when it wasn't.

Anonymous 66: Yeah. Yeah.

Jessica: Those are the things I'm talking about.

Anonymous 66: Yeah. That's fair.

Jessica: And I'm glad you brought it up because the truth of the matter is, yeah, you got a fucking Scorpio Moon. You got a Neptune/Mars square; that Neptune/Mars square can make you sometimes get paranoid⁠—

Anonymous 66: Oh, totally.

Jessica: ⁠—and not really have an easy time to know what's up. Venus square Pluto is really just like, "Are you abandoning me? Are you blaming me? Are you attacking"⁠—it can get very defensive.

Anonymous 66: Oh, definitely.

Jessica: It can get very compulsive. And then Moon/Pluto conjunction⁠—ditto. So I'm glad you asked that question because that is real. Sometimes your reactions⁠—they make sense to you and me and your therapist, and they're not necessarily appropriate for your date.

Anonymous 66: Yes.

Jessica: But being able to determine the difference between those feelings and the things I'm actually talking about is a skill. And I actually think you have, for the most part, a very good ability to tell the difference. It's just in the moment⁠—like for instance, you're hooking up with somebody. It's hot. You're having fun. You know you want to use a condom, but you don't want to be a bummer or you don't want to say no. And so you just don't assert it, and you hope and pray that he'll do it, and then you know he won't do it, so you just let it go.

Anonymous 66: Why do penis havers not carry around condoms all the time?

Jessica: Because they don't want to use them.

Anonymous 66: Exactly.

Jessica: It's a great reason. It's an excellent reason. It's a fucking perfect reason. If I don't want to wear a hat over my curls, I'm never going to carry a hat with me. That just makes perfect sense. And it should not be on you to have to carry them. Also, if you know that that's how it goes, then yeah, you should carry them because you care about you. And this is where I am really of the mind that you deserve to be with someone who doesn't only have boundaries to protect his own self but also boundaries around how he'll connect with others.

And so, if you know that you meet someone and you're like, "Okay. I'm working on my shit. This man is a summertime romance. He's got all the juj, none of the substance. I want to marry him immediately/I know nothing about him, and I can tell that maybe he's not a great guy," okay. Cool. So let's say you've figured all this out.

Anonymous 66: That is so accurate.

Jessica: You're welcome. Okay. So let's say you figure that out, and you're like, "Okay. I'm working on my shit, and that means I'm not going to date him date him. I'm not going to get involved, which means I can hook up with him one time and then burn his number, break my phone, leave the country." That's the only way that you can do casual sex. Let's pretend you were going to do that.

Anonymous 66: Okay.

Jessica: And let's say on that date, he tells you he is looking for love. He only wants partnership, and that's all he's looking for, not casual sex. Then it would be a disrespect of his boundaries for you to hook up with him because you would hear his needs and ignore them to get your own needs met. Right? Now, I used this in the direction I did because that's never going to happen that way. It's only going to happen in the flip, realistically speaking.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: But you can see how it's a dick move to hook up with someone who clearly expresses they don't only want to hook up when you know that's all you're going to do with them. Boundaries⁠—they're not just about you protecting you. They're about you being a decent person back and forth. In order to be a truly trustworthy person, you have to have boundaries. If you can never say no, no one can totally trust you. Right?

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: Yeah. Okay. So bear with me. Say your full name out loud again.

Anonymous 66: [redacted]

Jessica: Thank you. Is [redacted] your dad's last name or your mom's?

Anonymous 66: My mom's.

Jessica: What's your dad's last name? Do you know?

Anonymous 66: [redacted]

Jessica: There we go.

Anonymous 66: Oh. Interesting.

Jessica: There we go. Okay.

Anonymous 66: Wow.

Jessica: Hold on I mean, here's the thing. You've probably heard me say on the podcast before that I ask for mothers' maiden names because we're not just a product of one parent. It's true. Also, so much of what you've repressed in you is what you and your mother fears is like your father. Bear with me. You're really not always very nice to yourself, eh?

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: Yeah. Okay. I really do believe that you love love and also the distractions and the drug of it, the highs of it, even the lows of it. I don't think you like the endings, but I think there's a part of you that kind of needs those lows as well. You're down.

Anonymous 66: Oh my gosh. Yes. Oh man. I was on a long walk the other day, and I was feeling heartbroken. And every song was just hitting me. And I was like, "Do I like this feeling?"

Jessica: Yeah. You do.

Anonymous 66: Do I actually like it? Yeah.

Jessica: Yeah. You do. You like the drama a little bit. And hey. No fucking shade. There's nothing wrong with having a capacity for intensity. And I cannot stress that enough to you. The relationship that you have with your own intensity is not great. What I'm saying is you have these parts of yourself that try to manage these other parts of yourself, and it keeps you from wholeness. And those parts of yourself that are managing your intensity are also those same parts that are like, "Find a guy. Find a guy who says you're okay. Find a guy that it works with. And then you're going to be fine. Then you're not going to be intense."

But there is no man on this earth that is not going to piss you off. There is no man on this earth that is not going to trigger abandonment issues. There's no man on this earth who's always going to get it right or who you're always going to get it right with. And that's okay. That's just being a person. The depth of the fear that I see within you of being like your dad, it's like a⁠—I mean, the reason why I was so silent when I was looking at it is because it's like being at the top of the cliff and looking down a drop. It really freaks you out.

And I think that even if it's not something you cognitively think about a lot anymore, you have taken such effective steps to distance yourself from the edge of that cliff, even if the truth is it looks like it's a deep drop, but it's three feet. And I do see that developing a relationship with some sort of mental health practitioner that you can freely explore your fears around this with without judgment, without having to say it right, without having to worry about what they think⁠—I think that would be transformational and will 100 percent impact your ability to clearly answer, do you think you can be happy in a partnership? What do you want from a partnership? Why do you want to be partnered?

And if you find that you don't want to be partnered through this kind of investigation, then you can figure out what kind of a life you do want because the beautiful thing about having Jupiter conjunction to the Ascendant is you can have what you want, even when⁠—I will say this to you. You do have what you want. You just want the wrong things.

Anonymous 66: I have been realizing that I⁠—if I really think about something, if I try to manifest it, it comes along, but then I realize, "Oh, are you really that careful when…"

Jessica: When you're manifesting?

Anonymous 66: Exactly. Yeah. Yeah.

Jessica: That's your issue. I mean, as I said earlier, you are really clear that you want someone who gives you security. You date those guys. You're pretty clear that you want your summertime romance. You get those guys. They last three months, sometimes four. That's it. And that's how this goes. You're manifesting what you are clear about, and then you're heartbroken that you're not getting this thing you don't even know what it is, and you're not showing up for it. And that's great information, and you're at a very good age for figuring it out. You're at a very good age for figuring it out.

The next three years of your life, I would recommend making them the years of boundaries. Again, I want a little TM. I want you to really make it your brand where you really identify your boundaries or your lack of boundaries with yourself. And essentially, this is about giving yourself permission to develop more backbone at the risk of taking up more space, being more dramatic, being more intense. And understand that in doing this work, you will fuck up. You will be too intense. You will come in too hot. All of these things will happen sometimes. And if you make an error and you overstep in some way, you can always say, "Hey. That was an error. I really shouldn't have done that. I'm aware that I took up space in a fucked-up way, and I apologize."

This thing I want to put on a platter and hand to you is humility, and it's self-awareness. And you're very capable of it. But when you're in your state of "I have to repress all of my intensity," you tell yourself that that's not enough, that once you've made a mistake, it's written in stone and it's going to push you off that cliff that you're scared of. Again, this kind of complex within you comes from your mom and her own terror of your dad, of herself for having chosen him, of you being like him. It's all the things.

And so, if you really embark on this journey of unpacking this stuff, what you'll find is that some of your shit is actually your mom's shit that you need to let go of.

Anonymous 66: Oh, this makes a million percent⁠—you know. Yeah.

Jessica: Yeah. Yeah. And it's standing in the way of you choosing someone who likes it that you're big, who wants someone who is passionate and intense. And I can say as a super big, super bonkers, super intense person, there's tons of people out there who want to date intense people. There's nothing wrong with being yourself. And I don't mean being an asshole to people, but I do mean being intense is not a bad thing, and there are lots of people who would be happy to date somebody who's super intense. And you're just not dating them.

Anonymous 66: I get told by people that I seem very chill when they first meet me. It's my first impression.

Jessica: Yeah. It's a mistake.

Anonymous 66: Oh, no, I always think, "You don't know me at all."

Jessica: And again, this is where I come back to that advice of making sure that you express strong opinions, that you have boundaries, you say no in the first three dates. And becoming more aware of when you shut down or make yourself small⁠—being aware of it in the moment won't mean that you automatically stop doing it, but it means that for every ten times you do it, maybe you will adjust that two times. And then you can build on it. And that will meaningfully change things for you. Now, are you scared of being alone?

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: Yeah. So your mom's really scared of being alone.

Anonymous 66: Just so sad.

Jessica: It's interesting. Do you think it's sad that you're scared of being alone?

Anonymous 66: Yeah, I do. I just find it sad for my mother because, I mean, she has a partnership with my stepdad, but she doesn't really have any friends.

Jessica: You have lots of different kinds of friends. And you actually really like being alone.

Anonymous 66: Yes.

Jessica: Your mom doesn't have lots of friends and doesn't know how to be alone. And I'm not saying this to derail the conversation to your mom. I'm saying this because I think some of your assumption that you don't want to be alone is you feeling your mom's fears for you, which are really your mom's fears about herself. And so this is where energetic boundaries and working deeply with a good therapist can be really helpful for you because listen. All that Scorpio shit, Venus square Pluto⁠—yeah, you got a fear of being alone. But when you dig beneath the surface, I don't actually know that you do. It's both.

Anonymous 66: It is. Yeah. I love being alone, but I also am terrified of being alone. Yeah. It's really both.

Jessica: It's both. It's both. You have, again, lots of different kinds of friendships, different tiers of intimacy and connection with people.

Anonymous 66: Absolutely.

Jessica: Your ability to attract guys is not a problem. So every time you find yourself kind of getting twisted up around the fear of being alone, I want to just remind you that that's not your problem. Maybe one day, it'll be. Who knows? I'm a Capricorn. I'm down to imagine anything can go wrong. But it's not your problem. Your problem is figuring out how to be present with your own intensity, how to show up real with people at the beginning so you don't surprise them in the middle, and how to cultivate more self-acceptance for your most intense parts and to be patient within that process. Part of this is letting go of some of your mom's stories and fears, and that's a big process of figuring out, what are they? What is you? What is her? Where's the overlap? Where is it healthy? Where is it not?

Anonymous 66: I do feel like my mother has experienced a lot of abuse, too, and I do feel like I somehow just sucked a lot of that up and took it on. And I have never experienced this, but I feel like I can feel it with her sometimes.

Jessica: You can. Yeah. It's in your chart very clearly. And she was desperate for you to not be a victim, but she was also scared that you were going to be a perpetrator.

Anonymous 66: Yeah. That totally resonates.

Jessica: Yeah. And that's fucked up. I mean, it's not a criticism to her, but it is fucked up for you. How are you supposed to live if everything you do could land you either a perpetrator or a victim? I mean, I know you playact being a person on a date, and then it's like you're constantly watching yourself. And again, it's a very effective approach to trying to not be your mom's worst fears, but it's not an effective approach to being happy or whole or being intimate with people that are healthy and good for you. The good news is you don't do this shit with friends, for the most part.

Anonymous 66: No, I don't.

Jessica: You don't.

Anonymous 66: No.

Jessica: And you're friends with all the genders, eh?

Anonymous 66: Oh yeah.

Jessica: You're not just friends with girls. So this is really just about something really deep within you that comes up in partnerships, in no small part because of your parents' partnership.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: As hard as this is⁠—and this is very hard⁠—it's not scattered and all over the place. This is a really deep issue that you can focus on and work on, and it will have a really spectacular effect on everything. So it's kind of like doing a treatment plan to the roots of a tree will dramatically change not just the way the tree looks but how long it lives and the fruits it produces. That's what we're talking about here. It's working on your roots. And I know you came to me today, and back in 2019 or '18 you came to me to talk about, "I'm dating these guys, and they're either really fun and exciting or really stable and boring. What the fuck?" And we went someplace kind of deeper and more intense around it.

But the truth is that that's the real issue. And if you can cultivate greater comfort being with the intense parts of your nature⁠—and when I say intense, I mean⁠—I started to say earlier I do perceive that there's screaming in your head. You get really intense in your head. Is that correct?

Anonymous 66: Yes. Yeah. It feels like the emotions just⁠—like they're bubbling out. Yeah.

Jessica: I want to encourage you to practice being present with that, experiencing it, so that you have more agency with how you respond to it. And again, this is where I point you towards therapy. I would also say that in doing this work on yourself, I don't think you're going to have a hard time getting into a partnership that makes you happy if that's what you land on clarity that you want. I really don't. And it's not because I'm a Pollyanna, because girl, you know I'm no Pollyanna. It's because I see this for you.

I don't think relationships, like partnership stuff, is ever going to be completely easy for you. But I think you would be bored if it was completely easy. That's not what you want.

Anonymous 66: Yeah. It's true.

Jessica: But the key is, I would say, deemphasizing the importance of finding him now, finding him quickly, and instead emphasizing the importance of finding yourself and showing up in different ways when you first meet people and you first start to build up romantic entanglements with others.

Anonymous 66: Yeah.

Jessica: That's the work.

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Okay. We've got lots to talk about this week. Before we get into the details of the astrology, I just want to acknowledge that there's so much happening legislatively, culturally, with the climate. We also have a great deal of instability and violence happening globally. This is a really uncertain time. And there are lots of things we can do. Also, there's nothing we can do. They're both true. It depends on where you're looking at it from and how you're thinking about it. But I choose to align with trying to focus on what I do, how I participate, and I encourage you to do that, as well, around whatever it is that is most heartfelt for you or that you feel a calling towards.

But that's not what I want to talk about. What I want to talk about is more emotional, spiritual, and psychological. Anyone who has lived through a war, anyone who's lived through great trauma, knows that there are countless, countless opportunities big and small to do the right thing and to do the easy thing. And often, the easy thing is not the right thing. Yes, I'm speaking in simplistic moralistic terms, right and wrong, which⁠—I honestly hate when I do that, and I really don't like it when other people do that. But here I'm doing it. And the reason why I'm doing it is because having the emotional intelligence, having the bravery and the character, the moral fortitude, to do the right thing whether it's easy or not, whether it's convenient or not, is essential.

And as we've seen through COVID for the last few years, most people when push comes to shove will place their own personal comfort and ease ahead of the collective and ahead of caring actively with their actions for the most vulnerable amongst us. We've all seen it, and maybe many of you have done that. That's great information for you to have about yourself, and it's great information for you to have about others. As disheartening as it may be, that kind of attitude of, "Well, I gotta live my life," is real. It's very real. And also, it is a slippery slope. It is a slippery slope to place our own individual needs and desires for comfort, pleasure, security, above being there for other people.

I'm not trying to shame anyone for doing anything that they're doing or not doing things, as it were. But I think it's an important conversation for us to be having with ourselves and our gods if you're a religious person, if you're a spiritual person, or with yourself and your community⁠—whatever it is that resonates for you. Basically, what I'm trying to say is we've got to get our hearts and our heads screwed on tight because the shit that's coming⁠—we are certainly, here in the U.S., dealing with a white Christian nationalism, which is a terrifying shift. And it is essential that we find ways of thinking not just about ourselves and our own comforts but about others, about our communities, and that our considerations go beyond our own personal needs and preferences.

And again, through COVID, we've seen how hard that is. And I imagine it's only going to get harder, and it will only become more important. Doing the right thing because it's right is what is good for your soul. It's also good for your community and the larger global community that we live in. It's good for the planet. But if I cannot compel you with talks of the planet, perhaps you will consider the needs of your own damn soul, because turning our backs on others, perpetrating harm passively or actively towards others with a sense of entitlement, that shit is rough on the soul. It is really rough on the soul, and it is easy on the personality.

What I'm trying to say is it's the easy thing to do in the short term because, often, when we prioritize our needs over the needs of others, we're doing so because, again, of security or pleasure. And it is important to be humble about what we're doing and how it's impacting others and why. No shame. No shame. We're living the best we can. We're living in exceptional circumstances, most of us, and it's rough. But I do want to encourage you to consider and reconsider how you're participating and to know that so much more is coming, not to frighten you, but it shouldn't blow your mind, either, when you look at the world if you consume any amount of news.

We're in a time, and it's really important to center your heart, a.k.a. empathy and care and kindness, in your actions whether it's convenient or not, whether it's easy or not, whether it's scary or not. So that's just a little something I've been thinking about. And I've mentioned this on the podcast before, but a meaningful part of why I started Ghost of a Podcast was to create a resource to support people in cultivating emotional intelligence so that we could act from a place of emotional intelligence when shit got real, because of course, as an astrologer, I saw this stuff coming.

Cultivating a healthy and strong self is essential. It's essential. It's so important. But when that shifts into the whole world needing to revolve around you and your needs and preferences, that's where your ego gets out of whack, and it's very easy for the ego to get out of whack. And it's a dance. It's like a balancing act. It's really important to have a relationship with yourself where you're having these kinds of conversations so that you can participate in the world in a way that's not just good for the world but good for your soul.

I got one more thing to say before we do astrology, which is, if you're in the Bay Area, check out my installation at the Oakland Museum in the Hella Feminist exhibit if you haven't already. I feel really excited by it, and it's just, first of all, for me, just been such an honor to have a piece in the Oakland Museum, which is an amazing museum. If you're in the area and you've never checked it out, I don't know what you're waiting for. Maybe this. Maybe this is what you've been waiting for. But it's also a really exciting opportunity for me to be able to share this spiritual tool that I work with in my own personal life of clearing things through a portal. And in particular, those things are difficult-to-experience emotions, like entitlement or helplessness or panic or depression. And so, if you're in the area and you would like to have, I don't know, a spiritual experience with me, zoom/waddle/wheel your way over to the Oakland Museum and the Hella Feminist exhibit and check out my installation. I'm really, really excited to share it with you.

Okay. That's all I have to say before we get into the astrology of the week of August 7th through 13th of 2022. So this week starts with a kind of heavy transit. Well, there's two transits. One is heavy; one is light. Now, the heavy one is a Mars square to Saturn. And Mars square to Saturn⁠—you started to feel it on Friday of last week, Friday the 5th. A Mars square to Saturn is stressful. Mars is the planet that wants to get things done. It's the ego. It's entitlement. It's passion, ambition, and it's your body. Mars requires some form of visceral experience and expression in order to be played out in a healthy way. Saturn is related to society and your role within it⁠—in other words, compromise, reality, time, maturity.

When Mars and Saturn form a square to each other, lots of things are likely to happen, including but not limited to feeling really frustrated, feeling like you just want to get shit done, and your circumstances or people in authority or people who represent limitation to you get in your damn way. And the feelings that come up around this tend to be anger, sometimes rage, because Mars wants to express itself, and Saturn is like, "Tamp that shit down, Mars. I don't want to hear it." And so it can become like a seething feeling. It can bring up resentments, or it can bring up the feeling of just helplessness and hopelessness and exhaustion.

The latter really comes up when you have a hard time experiencing and expressing anger and rage. Then it tends to kind of get twisted up into victimization, sadness, exhaustion. So that tells you a lot. If that's your experience of this transit, it tells you a lot about your relationship to anger and being impassioned. If you're somebody who tends to run a little hot anyways, you want to prepare yourself for this transit by doing your best to find healthy outlets so that you don't snap at people or start shit that you don't really want to be involved in.

Now, the reason why this transit happens⁠—because, of course, there's always a positive; there's always a potential benefit. The reason why this happens is potentially, depending on your nature, to check your ego and make sure that you are aligned with humility and that the health and strength of your ego is proportionate and it is balanced. And Saturn can be a pain in the ass by teaching us this, but very helpful, very helpful. Another thing that this transit can do is it can help you to actively engage with your limitations or restrictions⁠—and these are all reality-based limitations and restrictions because thank you, Saturn⁠—but to engage with these in a way that is active, because Mars is a really active force in astrology.

And so you may find that you're just finally able to be like, "Screw it. I'm going to look for another job," or, "You know what? I actually need to tell you how I feel about the fact that you keep on stepping on my damn toes"⁠—metaphorically, I'm imagining, although Mars is related to the big toe, so who knows? Maybe it's literal. The thing about this transit is it is an opportunity for us to engage with our ego, with our relationship to anger, our relationship to control and compromise, in a more adult and mature way. That's cool. I mean, it's not fun, but it's really helpful and instructive.

And so, if there are difficult things that you know you need to do, then this is a good transit to attempt to do them, not because I'm promising you flow⁠—I am not⁠—but instead because it will kind of confront you with what is and isn't working, and that is really useful. So, if you are looking for a job and you can avoid doing an interview on this date, that would be great. This is not a great date for signing contracts or making decisions about projects because the vibe is not fantastic. However, basically anything that requires hard work, concentration, where you're not looking for quick results but you're looking for sustained results⁠—that is favored by this transit.

Things often go sideways. We encounter unexpected limitations or delays when it comes to any planet squaring Saturn, honestly⁠—certainly Mars, who wants to get it all done and done yesterday. So this isn't a great time for trying to force your will on the situation. It's unlikely to work. If there are problems, work with the problems. Just work with the problems. And if you can't work with problems, learn that about yourself. Be interested in what that means about yourself, and if you can be, be curious about what you might need to consider understanding about yourself working on or with within yourself after the transit passes. Don't do it while the transit's active because, TBH, this transit is stressful.

But luckily, on the same date, the 7th, we have another exact transit, which is quite supportive to the Mars square to Saturn. This transit is a Venus trine to Neptune. It's a great transit on its own, and of course, it's not on its own. But on its own, it's great for romance, creativity. It's a good time for meeting people, connecting socially and romantically, letting someone know you love them, playing with your look, playing with creativity and art, whether that means making shit or that means just listening to new music or going to a museum or something. It's a great transit for enriching and opening yourself up through creativity and connection. Great time to take a nature walk.

Because of the Mars square to Saturn and the transit I'll tell you about in a minute that's happening exact on the 8th but we're feeling very strong on the 7th, what Venus trine to Neptune is more likely to do for us is support us in acting in ways that align with our values, which is super cool, because the Mars square to Saturn can put us in a real scarcity mindset, and that scarcity mindset makes us defensive and kind of shrink our options, shrink our perspective. Venus trine Neptune is empathetic, it is generous, and it is open. And therefore, it will make it easier for us to not shrink in the presence of limitations or challenges.

Venus trine to Neptune makes it easier to have empathy and compassion for ourselves, and it makes it easier for us to have empathy and compassion for others. And you know what? You might really need it because Mars square Saturn is frustrating, and it makes it easy to be like, "I fucking hate that person. They cut me off in traffic. They are my mortal enemy," whereas Venus trine to Neptune is like, "Yeah, that person looked at me sideways and I am filled with hatred in my heart, and I'm aware that that is a really disproportionate response. And maybe they're just having a shit day. I don't know them. I don't need to be filled with hatred. Okay. I'm going to work on letting it go." Venus trine Neptune. Very helpful, very helpful.

Now, a lot of astrologers or astrology content you're going to see online is going to very much gender both of these transits. You'll read astrologers talking about Mars square Saturn is about problems with men, and it can be, for sure. It can be. But a person of any gender can represent the limitations and frustrations that we're likely to feel under the Mars square to Saturn. Conversely but on the same note, Venus trine Neptune⁠—sure. Absolutely, it can give you positive encounters with women. That is the thing you're likely to read if you're searching astrology on the World Wide Web, the 'net.

But Venus trine Neptune can give you love and connection and inspiration with people of any gender. So what we want to do when we're reading about astrology stuff and reading about gender stuff is to understand that this gendered stuff in astrology is really about energy. The thing to pay attention to is we all have feminine and masculine energy in our charts. We all have it in our nature, and it comes out in different parts of us in different moments and different circumstances.

I got more for you. On the 8th, we have two more transits that are exact. It's the same kind of setup where we have a kind of easy transit and a really challenging transit. Let's start with the challenging transit. That's the Venus opposition to Pluto. We're going to be feeling this transit through the 11th. Now, Venus opposite Pluto is very stressful. I shall not tell a lie. As you've heard me talk about on the podcast, when we're dealing with transits that are oppositions, we are more likely to be projecting things out or have things projected out onto us. And when we're dealing with Venus, we know it's often likely to be very relational, a.k.a. interpersonal. Pluto is drama, transformation, healing, and Venus is so many things. It's our values. It's our relationships. It's our relationship to beauty and the body and our aesthetics.

So Venus opposite Pluto can be really intense. The fact that it's overlapping so tightly with the Mars square to Saturn is not great news, unfortunately, because we're already feeling defensive. We're already feeling like someone or something is blocking us or getting in the way of our happiness or our progress. This transit can bring up paranoia because Pluto is obsessive and tends to go really deep into things. And so, if you feel off and like you're not sure about your place in someone's heart or life⁠—you're not sure what's happening in a relationship⁠—it can lead you to feeling really defensive and threatened, paranoid, suspicious, all these kinds of not-fun things.

Pluto is related to lots of taboo emotions, including possessiveness and resentments and jealousies and pettiness. This is why Pluto is related to manipulation. What can happen under this transit is you're in a dynamic where one person is manipulating the other. And that might be very much on purpose, and it might be kind of unintentional. The point is when Venus opposition to Pluto occurs, we're dealing with power struggles. We're dealing with the interplay of power. Because it's an opposition, because it involves Pluto, it can often be kind of fucked up. One person⁠—one or more people⁠—in the dynamic may be acting outside of integrity or basically being cruel. And this is only intensified because of the Mars square to Saturn.

This is a transformational time for getting real about your relationships, about what is and isn't working. And when I say your relationships, yes, I mean your interpersonal connections with other people/your relationships, but also your relationship to body image, your relationship to your money, your finances, your internal relationships that are values-based⁠—because it's Venus⁠—as well as your interpersonal relationships because truly, truly, the relationship that we have with ourselves is the foundation for what we're capable of with others, for what we're willing to consent to and what we're not. So the relationship that we have with ourselves is a reflection of our values, like it or not.

Now, because of the overlap between the Venus opposition to Pluto and the Mars square to Saturn, unfortunately, we may see a lot of defensiveness. So be on the lookout for either your own thought process or the words or behaviors of others that basically suggest a maladjusted ego. And if you can have empathy and compassion and patience⁠—which neither of these challenging transits support, but if you can attempt to have those things, then a greater level of awareness and healing can occur. A lot of us are going to just act out and get really pissed off or start shit or take the bait when someone else starts shit. And if that happens, there's something to be learned from it.

There's something to be learned from everything if you are orienting your thinking that way. And that's the best thing to do with Pluto because wherever Pluto is involved, the potential for transformation exists. And that transformation can be away from what you want or towards what you want. It's not going to be chill, but it does hold within it the power of transmutation. And that is some shit we need, all of us need. If you have been thinking, "I'm going to tell this person that I'm in love with them," or, "I want to ask for commitment. Let's be monogamous," yeah, don't do that this week. Okay? Just don't do it this week.

This is not a great week for trying to press your will or needs upon others, only because we're all going through these transits, so they're not likely to be in an easy frame of mind to meet your needs because they're probably struggling with their own needs. Now, you might not be able to avoid having these kinds of conversations for any number of reasons, in which case just try to be, again, very aware of your ego and what it's doing and the messages you're telling yourself about yourself, about your situation. If you find that the tempo of your interactions is speeding up and getting more activated, that's a good sign that you're in the throes of these energies, and that's not ideal.

So there's so many different ways that we can kind of de-escalate our insides, and they're going to be different for all of us. For me, I like to use breath work. I like to use music as a way to kind of take the compulsive parts of my mind off of the topic and get to a more neutral place where then I can start to figure out what's the best approach; what am I doing here? So you'll find your own. But all to say this transit is tricky. Now, at the same time on the same day, we have a Sun trine to Chiron. And it is helpful, really helpful to all this. So, while these are some very challenging transits, they have a lot of helpers around them.

So the Sun trine to Chiron is really helpful for engaging consciously, intentionally, with challenging things, with our wounding. So Pluto is going to trigger us. Saturn and Mars are going to trigger us. But the Sun trine to Chiron is there to support us in staying present with those triggers, understanding the difference between a trigger and a trauma. They are very different things, and they take different remediation, different actions to soothe and care for ourselves in situations. So being able to tell the difference is supported by the Sun trine to Chiron, not so much any of the other three transits. But the Sun trine to Chiron empowers us, or it can empower us, to stay present with difficulty. And that is perfectly timed.

Now, this all said, my friends, that brings us to the Full Moon in Aquarius on August 11th, and it will be exact at 6:36 p.m. Pacific Time⁠—Full Moon in Aquarius on the 11th. On the same date, we have two other exact transits and an ingress. So the Sun is exactly square to Uranus on the 11th, and Mars is exactly sextile to Neptune on that same date, while Venus moves into Leo. So Full Moon in Aquarius⁠—as you know, the Sun and Moon are exactly opposite by degree, not just sign, when we have a Full Moon. And Full Moons when things come to the surface. It's when our emotions bubble up and demanded to be dealt with. We can't push them down. We can't reason them away. That's the point of a Full Moon. It's confronting.

While most of us, most of the time, do not enjoy being confronted, it is really necessary. Full Moons happen every month as a way to stop us from pursuing paths that are out of alignment with our hearts. The tension between the Sun in Leo and the Moon in Aquarius is in some meaningful ways the tension between what I need for me and what I need for us. Aquarius and Leo are fixed signs. Of course, Leo is fire; Aquarius is air. And because they're fixed signs, there's a little bit of a stubborn energy there. There's a little bit of a "This is how it's done; don't ask me to change my damn mind" energy.

And just to make things a little more complex, Saturn is conjunct the Moon during this Full Moon. We have the Sun/Moon opposition, which of course includes Saturn, so we've got the Moon and Saturn opposite the Sun forming a square. And that square goes to the North Node/Uranus/Mars conjunction, which is not exact but still very much active. So this could be quite explosive. Now, you may have noticed that I haven't talked about the transits so far this week in the context of social and political things. That's more for my nervous system and yours and less because I don't see things coming from these intense transits. We are just in a serious go time, and things are going. Things are happening.

So this Full Moon is likely to bring up heavy feelings, heavy feelings⁠. A sense of fatedness or karmicness is likely to be activated, especially if you have planets at around anywhere from⁠—I don't know⁠—16, 17 degrees, to about 26, 27 degrees of a fixed sign. You may need to take responsibility for something you've already done, or you may need to take responsibility for what needs to be done. And I'm saying done⁠—I'm using an action word⁠—because of Saturn, Uranus, and Mars's involvement in this Full Moon chart. When we look at this Full Moon chart, we can know that something needs to change. And because there's going to be an exact Sun square to Uranus on this Full Moon, it's going to be especially rattling or destabilizing. That's the very nature of Uranus. It upends things⁠—and again, all happening in fixed signs, so there's likely to be resistance.

When we have a Sun square to Uranus, things feel unpredictable. They feel stressful. Uranus in particular is related to our nervous system. And so you may be feeling really anxious or, in some way, nervy. So, for some people, that means being really excitable, really distracted. For some people, that means being really panicky and anxious. It can manifest in lots of ways. But because Uranus is still so close to Mars, it's likely to be visceral. It's likely to have a physical experience and expression to it, which means that some people are going to act out, and potentially violently. Some people are going to pursue dominance and aggression as a way to cope with how they're feeling destabilized and maybe powerless or uncertain, which fucking sucks, but that's people.

So, if you are somebody who tends to go in that direction, this is an important time to work with and on your shit. This is an important time to understand your own impulses and to do your best to not act on and center your loudest and most aggressive ones. If you are around somebody who fits that description but you are not the aggressive type, you might need some strategy. Again, there's a Moon/Saturn conjunction opposite to the Sun here, so you might need to be really intentional about how you engage with conflicts and activated situations. You may need to adopt a long-game approach, or you may need to get in there and get something done. That is at your discretion, of course.

However, Saturn does not favor quick and dirty approaches. Saturn wants us to have sustainable, slow and steady, effective approaches. And so what you do or don't do now is likely to have big-picture, long-term consequences. It's really important that you bring consideration to whatever it is that you do or don't do. And that means engaging from a place of humility and responsibility. Unfortunately, because the Moon and Saturn are sitting on top of each other and the Sun is opposite Saturn, yeah, we're likely to feel a little depressive. It's just a heavy vibe. And when we feel depressive, we feel a sense of scarcity. When we feel scarcity, it is hard to act in an abundant and brave way. Again, this is the stuff I was talking about at the top of this segment.

This Full Moon is likely to bring up a situation in your life or in the world where you can learn something meaningful about yourself and others and how you behave in the presence of threats. And if you find out something about yourself or someone you're close to or interconnected with that doesn't feel safe, you can get mad, feel your feelings, but do something about it. Use the information you garner from your lived experience of the Full Moon. And when we're in it⁠—and this is a very activating Full Moon, so we're likely to feel very much in it on and around the 11th⁠—it's not the easiest time to extrapolate data and make sense of it. So you might want to set some time with your dear diary, with your most insightful bestie, a couple days after the 11th to unpack whatever it is that came up around this time.

Now, if you're the kind of person who likes to do Full Moon rituals, this is a bit of a challenging one for rituals. As always, I will remind you that New Moons are when we plant seeds, set intentions, and Full Moons are when we release and when we clear. This is not a great time for doing any kind of really rigorous Full Moon rituals because this energy is so unpredictable. As you've heard me say about Eclipses, you don't want to manifest on a fault line. So this is a great time to be open and responsive as opposed to stirring the pot. The pot, my friends, will get stirred. It does not need your help. So I would save your most evocative Full Moon rituals for a different lunation. That's my hot take. Again, you do you.

Now, you want to keep in mind Venus is still opposite to Pluto. It's out of sign now, but it's still happening. Mars is still square to Saturn. It is not exact, but it's still happening. So defenses and interpersonal challenges are likely to be really intense. And because it's a Full Moon and emotions are running wild, it could come from any direction. You do not need to fear this Full Moon. What you want to do is work with its energies. And on a collective level, we may see opportunities for revolution and for meaningful change. And those opportunities for creating change may come suddenly.

And so it's important, especially if you're an organizer, an activist, if you're in politics, if you have some sort of power in the collective or you're already engaged in process⁠—it is important to be open⁠—with great intention and care, because Saturn is involved⁠—to seize upon opportunities when they spontaneously emerge. Now, the same thing is true in your personal life. The more you know yourself, the easier it is to identify whether an opportunity is a good one for you or just a good one on paper, whether a challenge is fucking your life up or just a difficult lived experience, because it's valuable to know the difference because then we can engage in a more effective and healthy way.

So expect the unexpected. Expect things to be a little chaotic, a little unpredictable, but ripe for change. If things come up earlier in the week with the Mars/Saturn Square, with the Venus/Pluto opposition, and you're just trying to push them down, you're trying to repress them, you're trying to just hold out for easier astrology or easier circumstances to emerge, best of luck with that strategy because this Full Moon is going to bring shit up. While that might sound a little intimidating, if you know it's coming, then you can do your best to stay aligned with your values, to make sure that if you're having problems, they're healthy problems, because problems are not inherently a bad thing. I mean, they may not be fun, but they're not bad. Problems will often help us to get out of our own way, to break patterns or habits that are limiting, that never worked for us or once worked for us and aren't anymore.

It's valuable to be able to withstand⁠—to stay present through⁠—difficult emotions because when we have the capacity to tolerate our emotions instead of to have knee-jerk reactions to them or to even stay present with our knee-jerk reactions to our emotions, that's when we are able to cultivate greater emotional maturity. And that allows us to make better choices, to feel more at peace with our choices⁠—the good ones, the bad ones, the ugly ones. It helps us to be healthier, and that has no downside. So the key, my friends, is to not seek to soothe ruffled feathers this week but instead to seek to be as authentic, healthy, compassionate, responsible, and open as you can be. That's all. No big deal. No big deal.

But for reals, it's a great opportunity. And as you know, we have one Full Moon per sign per year. This is your one time in 2022 to really engage with the Aquarian Full Moon, so I say make use of it. Okay. My loves, that's your horoscope. Let me run through the transits in case you are a note-taking nerd, my favorite kind of nerd.

Okay. On the 7th of August, we have two exact transits: an exact Venus trine to Neptune as well as an exact Mars square to Saturn. On the 8th, Venus is exactly opposite to Pluto, and the Sun forms an exact trine to Chiron. On the 11th, we have a Full Moon in Aquarius that is exact at 6:36 p.m. Pacific Time, as well as an exact square between the Sun and Uranus⁠—also an exact sextile between Mars and Neptune. And on the same date, Venus ingresses into Leo.

My loves, if you get value from the podcast, I do invite you to give it five stars on whatever platform you're listening to it, and write a positive review. It means so much and it's really helpful to the podcast. If you want to learn more with me, you can go to my website and go to the Shop page and find lots of classes that I have for sale. You can also join me over on Patreon, where I post frequently, and yeah, that's just my happy place on the internet. So join me there. Learn all manner of woo with me there. And of course, you can grab my book, Astrology for Real Relationships: Understanding You, Me, and How We All Get Along. If you're into relationships and astrology⁠—I mean, I don't know; maybe that's not your thing. But if it is, the book is good. The book is cute. The book is your friend, or at least it wants to be your friend.

Okay. This has been fun. I'll talk to you next week. Buh-bye.