Jessica: Welcome to Ghost of a Podcast. I'm your host, Jessica Lanyadoo. I'm an astrologer, psychic medium, and animal communicator, and I'm going to give you your weekly horoscope and no-bullshit, mystical advice for living your very best life.

I know you're trying to keep up with the transits, and if you are a student of astrology or you're a professional astrologer looking for a tool that's not noisy that can help with your astro workflow, then I've got the tool for you. It's Astrology For Days. It's the transit-tracking tool that offers you no noise, just exactly what you need: a clean, clear place to keep notes and track the damn transits. Just go to astrologyfordays.com to subscribe today. If you're trying to check it out, you can subscribe for a month, or you can subscribe for the whole year. That's astrologyfordays.com.

Welcome back to Ghost. This week, I have a real treat for you. I am sharing an excerpt of a podcast that I was on where I got to give some readings. It's called Sex Talk With My Mom, and I hope you check it out. And if you like this reading, you can hear the full episode over on their feed. So please enjoy the readings that I gave to Cam and KarenLee.

Cam: So can we ask, maybe, one personal question from each of us?

Jessica: Fuck yeah. Let's do it.

Cam: Okay.

Jessica: Let's do it.

KarenLee: Here we go.

Cam: Mom, do you want to go first, or do you want me to go first?

KarenLee: I think you deserve to go first.

Cam: Okay. I'll go first.

KarenLee: He hasn't been feeling well. He deserves to get some personal attention.

Cam: Thank you, Mom. I'm curious about two—one question related to career and one question related to relationships.

Jessica: Okay.

Cam: So I guess that's two questions. The first one is I'm obviously spending a lot of time on career. As I just told you, I'm having the palpitations. And I would like to know, is this the right path? Should I keep going in this way, at this speed?

Jessica: Here's the answer. You and speed is a complicated relationship. It looks like you are really good at going long and going hard. You tend to work incredibly hard, and you're not great with the boundaries thing. You just kind of work until you collapse, or you work until something stops you, eh?

Cam: Mm-hmm. That's correct.

Jessica: And so you're going through a period right now where you have great opportunity for power and success and expansion of your career. But if I was to say to you, "Yeah, keep on going at this speed," then I would be slightly inhumane because success is only success if you can feel it. I know you live in LA, and so a lot of people disagree with me, but I know I'm right. I've worked with so many successful people. I know many successful people in a conventional sense. And are they happier than people who have less? No. No fucking way. They're not.

So you know that some of the ways in which you're working aren't sustainable, and they're not really serving you, but they're effective. And so the question is if you believe in what you're doing. And if you want to build it for your future, can you use this moment to develop new habits so that if you are as successful as it seems like you could be, that you could actually enjoy your fucking success, that you could actually—yeah, that you could thrive and be abundant and not just have more. Does that make sense as an answer?

Cam: Yeah.

KarenLee: So did you get this on just his chart or—

Jessica: Yes.

KarenLee: —a genuine feeling?

Jessica: 100 percent off his birth chart.

KarenLee: Wow.

Jessica: 100 percent the birth chart. I can drop a couple details. I just assume you guys won't know what I'm saying, but watch me go. So you've got this Mars/Jupiter conjunction and anaretic degrees of Taurus in the first house. And this is why you've always been like—people like you. You get along. Opportunities kind of fall into your lap. You're kind of resilient, and I say kind of because you have mitigating factors in your chart. But this part of you is very resilient, and you get so much positive reinforcement for going long, going hard, for being resilient, for being a kind of easygoing but strong, very present guy that it's easy for you to overdevelop that part of yourself, because it gets such great results and people like it, and underdevelop how you feel and what you need.

And those are things that you do have a tendency to underdevelop. I know we're going to talk about love. I was just giving you a little spoiler. And for you to have a balanced life in the way that you actually want where you have friends and you have love and you have time to be alone, because you need time alone—for you to have all those things will require figuring out how to pace yourself more efficiently as an adult because pacing yourself efficiently in your 20s is a different thing than in your 30s, and it's a different thing on and on, every decade. Right?

Cam: Mm-hmm.

Jessica: So, anyways, that's the quick—and, also, your Midheaven is at 25 degrees of Cap, and Pluto is conjunct your Midheaven. So your career is kind of exploding right now.

KarenLee: So which career is this? Is this—he's got a couple different things going on.

Jessica: But they're all interconnected, no?

KarenLee: Yes.

Jessica: Yeah. So, when I look at Cam's chart, what I see is that on the one hand, it does look like you have the tendency to have your job—you have a career that's like a job that is the thing you put at the top of the pile. But everything you do is interconnected because you're just that kind of guy. And, also, that might not be the thing you like the most. And I am a fucking hippie, so I think you should love what you do if you do it over and over again. And it's not always possible, but for you it is. For you, your chart says very clearly if you're willing to be true to yourself in a way that doesn't always make sense to other people, if you're willing to make adjustments kind of frequently even when you'd rather just set it and forget it—if you're willing to do those things, yeah, I mean, you can pretty much have what you want.

The trouble is you do get stopped up with your personal life, and it influences your goals a little bit. But you're really young, and I imagine that you're—I mean, from what I'm seeing, you're doing great. I'm not worried for you. Who's worried? Is someone worried for you? I mean, we're worried that you're sick right now, but we're not worried for you. You're doing well. Does that make sense to both of you?

Cam: I appreciate that. I think my mother—

KarenLee: [Crosstalk 00:06:35].

Cam: —loves it. Here's why she loves it: because I have this career, which is this podcast network that I run. And that—

Jessica: Oh, you run a podcast network?

Cam: Yeah.

Jessica: That's amazing. Congratulations.

Cam: Thank you. And then I have this show with mom called Sex Talk With My Mom that you're currently on.

Jessica: Yes indeed.

Cam: And we're hoping to make it into a TV show.  And she recognizes that my time is limited between all these different things. So, obviously, she wants the one involving her to—

KarenLee: Well, you kind of said it without saying it.

Cam: —pop off.

Jessica: The other thing is—listen. You're really good at asking for help, and you're also really bad at asking for help, Cam. You're both. And I think there's just certain things that you prefer to do by yourself because you just want them to be done right. And you're a Pisces and you prefer to be easygoing and nice with people, but you're actually really rigid, and there's a way that things need to be done around certain things—

KarenLee: 100 percent.

Jessica: —so those are the things you don't like to ask for help with. Yeah. Yeah.

KarenLee: And he's a perfectionist.

Jessica: So you're dealing with that very much—

Cam: Yeah.

Jessica: —to your own detriment. And I mean it. It is something to work on because there's no such thing as perfection, and every failure is an opportunity to learn. And there is a way—okay, and pardon me, because I'm doing a damn thing here. But there is a way that you manage your mental health by being perfectionistic. And when things go sideways on you, you take it real fucking hard. Luckily, they don't go sideways on you a ton, but when they do, it can be really hard on you psychologically and emotionally.

And so part of your perfectionism is kind of keeping unpleasantness at bay. And so, from my perspective looking at your birth chart, developing greater emotional intelligence and more accessible and appropriate emotional tools for yourself right now as you are and as you grow, the easier it will be to manage work/life balance and manage perfectionism because the problem isn't really around how you work. It's more about your motivation for why you work yourself so hard.

I'm giving you excellent advice. I don't mean to brag. I know it doesn't totally make sense.

KarenLee: It does.

Jessica: But think about it and work with it.

Cam: I plan to relisten to this and soak it in.

Jessica: Good. Good. That's the goal. So you wanted to ask me about love?

Cam: Yes.

Jessica: Okay. Tell me, what's the question?

Cam: So I guess the question—this might tie into your comments about mitigating factors. It's very challenging for me to find a long-term relationship, or even short-term relationships, honestly. I partially know why that is, but I'm curious to know why you think it is and also if I should try to change that in any way.

Jessica: Do you want to be in a long-term relationship?

Cam: If I found the right person.

Jessica: That's not an answer.

Cam: No, I'd be open to that. Eventually, I do want to be in a long-term relationship and have a family.

Jessica: Okay. Oh, so you want human children?

Cam: Human children, ideally.

Jessica: Okay. Okay. I mean, people love dogs. People love cats. They're very happy with birds. Okay. So you're saying in a very Piscean, nondirect way that you want to be in a partnership that leads to children, a.k.a. a marriage, but not now. Correct?

Cam: Right. Yeah.

Jessica: Okay.

Cam: Correct.

Jessica: And that's your answer. The reason why you're not getting into relationships—you don't like hurting people's feelings. You don't like saying no to people. And you're straight, right? You date girls/women?

Cam: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Jessica: Ideally, women. So what do women want? Generally speaking, commitment. Right? They want to know it's moving towards a thing. You're ambiguous. Your Sun is in Pisces. It's in the twelfth house. You have an intercept Moon in Aries. Ambiguity is your middle name when it comes to relationship stuff, not much else. You're not ambiguous around career, not at all. But when it comes to intimacy, you are ambiguous.

And so you do this thing where you start dating women, and they're like, "Oh my God. He's so serious. He's so sweet. This is going somewhere." And you're like, "Eh, I don't know. Maybe." And then you bounce, but you feel bad. A lot of dudes bounce and they feel fine. You bounce and you feel bad. And so, instead of putting yourself in that position, you just get really picky, or you only go for unavailable people. And that is called a self-fulfilling prophecy.

And so here we go. Learning how to have boundaries with people is really important, and part of having boundaries with people is not giving them everything in the first three dates. You do this because, in part, you've got Venus in Pisces. You're a romantic. You're a little bit devotional in your love language or whatever. You like being perceived as a sweet person.

Unfortunately, what this translates to in heterosexual union is, "Oh my God. He's so sweet. He has a podcast with his mother. Let's do this." And then you're like, "Oh my God. No. Wait. No. What? Wait. No. What? Wait." And so, again, low self-esteem makes you feel like shit, and we're back to—what are your coping mechanisms for feeling like shit? You work. You become busy.

So now we have a cycle. And, unfortunately, in the context of capitalism and being an ambitious person, it's a very kind of high-functioning coping mechanism. And it's so high-functioning, you could do what a lot of dudes do. You could wake up one day, you're 45, and you're like, "Oh, fuck. I guess I really actually have to fix this." And then what do you do? Well, you have a lot of options, but all of them involve you—if you have kids—being a much older father, which isn't bad. But I can see in your chart it's not what you want.

And I can see in your chart—sorry, Mom, if this is a sorry Mom thing—that you are ambiguous about kids. You said you wanted kids in such a clear way. I imagine you've been saying that your whole life. I don't believe you. I believe that you maybe want kids. But I do see how seriously you take parenting and how seriously you take intimacy and how you haven't figured out how to navigate your own independent needs yet, and so it scares you because having kids means your heart is walking around in other people's bodies. Right? It's not something to be cavalier about. How can you work the way you work as a dad? A lot of guys could. A lot of women could. I don't know that you could.

KarenLee: No, he couldn't.

Jessica: You care really intensely. And I think that all of these things put together—and you're how old now? I know I'm looking at your birth year.

Cam: 32.

Jessica: Thank you. Okay. So you're right at the verge of your Christ year. Okay. So this is all good—you're the right age for us to be having this conversation because next year, your 33rd year, will be a time where you will be confronted with your choices here. And it's not choices around women. Attracting partners is not your problem, honey. You have problems; that's not your problem. The problem is more around what you're willing to do and whether or not it works for you.

And I will give you a little bit more here, which is to say that even though you're really ambiguous and you like to pull back, you've got abandonment issues. And so you don't like women who are super aloof and cavalier. You like women who are attentive. Has anyone ever broken up with you?

Cam: No.

KarenLee: Unless—

Cam: Maybe one person.

KarenLee: In seventh grade, maybe.

Cam: But it was a mutual thing.

Jessica: Okay. So they broke up with you, but it was mutual.

Cam: Right.

Jessica: It's a very Piscean answer again. Very Piscean answer. Okay.

KarenLee: How would you like to do a podcast with him?

Jessica: So there's something as an astrologer that I am always looking out for, which is what I call the projected form of the birth chart. So, when I look at your birth chart, it says, "Oh, look. He's got abandonment issues." The idea of being broken up with or, worse, somebody just fucking bouncing, somebody just leaving, is very painful. So how do you work around it? You just only engage with people who you're quite certain are not going to do that, even though, ironically, that doesn't work for you because those people end up being a little bit needier and a little bit too there for you. And so you end up leaving because that doesn't work either.

The key for you, and I cannot say this emphatically enough, is boundaries. It's having healthy boundaries with yourself so that you can then have them with women because the truth is the woman who's going to be the right person for you has her own fucking thing going on.

KarenLee: Exactly.

Jessica: And, also, she is tender and supportive and really emo and also—third, very important part, and I'm sure Mom is going to agree with me—will call you on your shit, because it looks like people don't always do that because you're so nice. But in intimate relationships is where—and, again, you haven't had many yet, it sounds like. So maybe it's TBD here. But in intimate relationships, the parts of you that are not as nice is where it comes out.

When you're done, when you don't want to have a conversation, you're done. When you're shut down and you just need to be alone, you're done and not super flexible there. And in a marriage, in an intimate long-term relationship, that shit is either going to not fly, or you need the right person who's like, "Okay, he's off for now," or, "Hey, I'm over here, honey. You don't get to just check out until we finish our conversation," and they say it in a way that actually works with you.

And this is something that is difficult. It's just difficult, but it's absolutely doable. Finding the right person is a risk because if you seek the right person, you might find the wrong person.

Cam: Do you see in my chart that I'm going to end up with one person?

Jessica: Are you asking me about marriage or are you asking me about polyamory?

Cam: Oh. More about marriage.

Jessica: Okay.

Cam: Yeah. Finding one is—no—yeah.

Jessica: Okay. I just like to be real specific here. Truth talk. If you want to be partnered, you can be. It is in your best interest to be partnered. And do I see that it will happen? I can't say that. You are very strong willed. You are very strong willed. And I think that you—let me put it this way. I can walk around the world being like, "I want to lose five pounds. I want to lose five pounds." I tell all my friends, "I want to lose five pounds." I think about it all the time. "I want to lose five pounds." And then, "Hey, can I have a bite of your muffin?" I just bought a chocolate bar. I'm eating all of the coffees with all of the creamer and the whipped cream.

So there's a difference between desire and choice. And you have not made the choice, or any of the many choices one needs to make to have a partner. Now, you can make that choice later today. You can make that choice tomorrow. But you have not currently made that choice, and I think that this is where we come back to free will. I see that even though you could absolutely be partnered/married happily, with or without kids, even though it is, I think, something that would make you very happy, you could absolutely end up not doing it. And that would be a passive choice that you make with great effort, as you've been doing, as I would describe it.

Cam: I appreciate that.

Jessica: You're welcome. [Sorry 00:18:15].

Cam: Thank you.

Jessica: You're welcome.

Cam: That was great. This is fascinating.

Jessica: Thank you very much.

Cam: Thank you for sharing that.

Jessica: It's my pleasure. It's my pleasure. Yeah.

KarenLee: I would like to find out about my relationship with Cam as a partner; my business, where it's going in terms of—like he said, we're trying to do an animated TV show; and my current relationship with my boyfriend.

Jessica: Animated TV show?

KarenLee: Yes.

Jessica: No one said that. That's cool. Okay.

KarenLee: And the current relationship that I've had for 13 and a half years, who I live with, my boyfriend.

Jessica: Okay.

KarenLee: So I don't know how you can zero in on [crosstalk 00:18:50].

Jessica: Oh, honey, I can go. Watch me go. Watch me go. Okay. Let's start with career because it's the simplest straightforward answer that I see. So, while Cam's Midheaven, which is the career point, is activated right now, yours gets activated next year, early next year and for two years. And so, if you're trying to create a deal that will be a TV show, the astrology is fucking excellent for that.

KarenLee: That's what my tarot card said.

Jessica: Great. It looks excellent. The only mitigating factor, I'll say, is that the Pluto Return of the United States is this massive transit that's happening, which can be very tumultuous. And what I think can happen is that deals—entertainment deals—can go in radically different ways when major social unrest occurs. So that would be the only thing that I could see stopping it. That's how strong it is.

So your career shit looks like check it off the fucking thing. It's great. And you love doing it.

KarenLee: I truly do.

Jessica: It brings you joy.

KarenLee: Oh yeah.

Jessica: It looks like a hobby—not like it looks like a hobby in a negative way. It's just like you would do this in any context. This is just fun for you.

KarenLee: Absolutely.

Jessica: Now, the other two questions were about your partnership. And do you live together?

KarenLee: Yes.

Jessica: And are you guys monogamous?

KarenLee: Yes.

Jessica: Okay. Hold on. Let me just peep around. And what do you want to know about this relationship?

KarenLee: Well, 13 and a half years, and it's been woo-woo-woo. I'm just curious as to the future of the relationship, if you see it progressing in a positive way, or is it going to be rocky road, or is it going downhill?

Jessica: So are you really asking? Do you really want me to look at this?

KarenLee: Yes.

Jessica: Okay. So I'm going to do it psychically. Watch a bitch go. So I want to make sure I'm seeing him correctly. He's both really easygoing and really rigid?

KarenLee: Yes.

Jessica: Okay. Kind of a big guy?

KarenLee: Yes.

Jessica: Okay. Got him. You fight a lot?

KarenLee: Yes.

Jessica: In some ways, I think it works for you to fight a lot. And sometimes I look at conflict, and I'm like, "Okay, you're fighting about something substantive, and this is unhealthy." And sometimes I look at conflict and I'm just like—it's like [schvitzing 00:21:16]. It's just what you do. It's maybe a little unpleasant, but it is what it is. I think there are moments and maybe even months where you're like, "This is bullshit. This is too much fighting. We're fighting about things that are actually not okay." And the rest of the time, you're like, "This is what we do, and this actually works for me. It's working."

And it's not conventional. I think the key is whether or not you fight fair and whether or not, when things are substantive, you can slow the conversation down and actually fucking have a conversation instead of just being kind of jerks to each other, which, again, kind of works for the two of you. Does that make sense?

KarenLee: Spot-fucking-on.

Jessica: Yeah.

KarenLee: What do you think, Cam?

Cam: Yeah, that's a very accurate interpretation.

Jessica: Thank you very much.

KarenLee: Literally like it was beyond.

Jessica: Thank you very much. You know, luckily—

KarenLee: I have tears because it was so perfect.

Jessica: Good. Thank you. And also—

KarenLee: Thank you.

Jessica: —the sex is good?

KarenLee: The sex is great, and I can say that in front of my son. He's a Gemini.

Jessica: Well, I have one of those, too, at home. Big fan. So, in your birth chart, you have Mars as the focal planet of your T-square. And what this means, very broadly speaking—I won't get into all the details of the world, but what this means is that it took you a long time when you were younger to give yourself permission to have your anger in a healthy way. And, for you, having intimate relationships where you can be fucking annoyed with people, because people are annoying—

KarenLee: Yes.

Jessica: —is actually good for you, as long as you know the limits. And, inevitably, you cross the line sometimes, and I'm sure he crosses the line sometimes. And the problem with that is only if you're not willing to be humble and be like, "I crossed the fucking line. That wasn't fair. We have rules of conduct. I'm aloud to insult your hairline, and I'm not allowed to insult your shoe size, and that's the rules. So I'm sorry I crossed the line." As long as you can have those kind of agreements, it's fine for you.

And there's a way that, for you—living your life in a way that works for you—fuck convention. It's one of the things you've come here to figure out. It's one of the things you've come here to really give yourself. And this is really unconventional.

KarenLee: He is 15 years younger than me. Start with that.

Jessica: Oh, and he's 15 years younger. That doesn't look like an issue. Is it an issue?

KarenLee: Nope.

Jessica: No, it doesn't look like an issue at all. It doesn't look like it's an issue for him or for you. Does he have health problems?

KarenLee: Not yet. One of the things we fight about is what he eats.

Jessica: Yeah. Is there heart disease in his family?

KarenLee: His dad had a heart attack at 62.

Jessica: Yeah. I mean, I do see that his—I mean, you're healthier than him. He does need to take better care of his cardiovascular system, and he has to take better care of his body in general. And you are not in a place in your life where you want to manage that anymore. And that doesn't mean that you don't talk about it all the fucking time. You got Mercury and Venus in Virgo, so you probably are like, "You should do this. You should do that," to everyone that you care about. But you actually don't want to mother him. You've done that in your life, and you're done with that. And so it's a little bit of a mixed message that you give him.

It's like you expect him to do it on his own, but you also kind of micromanage it. And I think having a conversation with him where you say to him, "Listen. I understand that I try to micromanage, and I don't do it always because I love you. I do it because it's my habit, and I do it because I love you, and I do it because I'm scared you won't take care of yourself if I don't remind you. And I want you to know the reason why I do it is because I love you, and I don't want to watch you suffer, and I don't want to lose you. And I love you. If you can hear that, what can you say to me?" Just ask him, "What can you say to me?"

This thing I'm suggesting is something that I call—it's like a relationship theory that I have and that I use with my clients all the time. I call it blow jobs and pizza. When we—

KarenLee: I love it.

Jessica: Welcome to my mind. Welcome to my mind.

KarenLee: I love it. I'm there.

Jessica: Thank you. I had a feeling you'd be ready to go. So the blow jobs and pizza theory is, when we're in a partnership and the only time we talk about difficult things is when we're having a fight or when you're riled up about a thing, your partner is responding to your energy and your tone and not your words. So, if instead—blow jobs for everyone. You order a pizza or whatever is delicious and fun and not too serious. And you remember that you're a team.

And then, as a teammate, you say to your teammate, "Hey, teammate. I know I don't always pass the ball the way I should. I know you don't. And I want us to be a better team. Let's talk about this difficult thing." Everyone's more open. The conversation goes better. And if you do it as a manipulation tactic, it doesn't work. It only works when you remember he is your fucking teammate, and the reason why you get on him is only because (a) it's fun, and (b) you're scared. You care about him and you're scared.

And so this strategy, it really works when used, and it'll work with him. It would also work on you if he was listening. So for whatever that's worth. But, overall, the relationship looks good. I look at your chart, and I see that you really—you could stay or go, kind of in general. You're a person who's just like—you change. You really change in life. And so the question that you've asked me—I'm not sure if you're like, "Will we be together forever?" I would hate to answer that question for you because I don't want you to feel strangled. I don't want you to feel stuck.

KarenLee: I didn't ask that question.

Jessica: Just keep on choosing him until you don't choose him. Does that make sense?

KarenLee: Yeah. That's how we've taken it, like day by day. And I'm like, well, it works for me today. Didn't work for me a couple months ago—

Jessica: That's the way to do it.

KarenLee: —but it worked for me today.

Jessica: I think that's the way to do it. I'm in a ten-year-long relationship myself, and we're forever affianced. I don't want to get married. It makes me want to poke my eyes out. Would hate to be married. And we are in the state of fiancés where it's always potential and commitment and romance. And I'm a fan of that. And your chart is Uranian enough that some version of that is what works for you. Being able to choose your partner instead of being contractually obliged to your partner is a better match for you.

KarenLee: Much better.

Jessica: Yeah. So this is where you need to be now. I think that this relationship gives you the stimulation and also the stability that you crave. And sometimes you wish you were getting a little more stability and you're getting stimulation, vice versa. Sometimes it goes either way. But I think the problems in this relationship are actually kind of—they're not big problems for you, for the most part. Does that make sense? So I see you smiling and agreeing.

KarenLee: Cam, does that make sense?

Jessica: That's what I'm curious about.

Cam: Yeah. Totally. It does. Yeah.

Jessica: Okay. Cool. Cool, cool, cool. That's great. That's great. Okay. So now we have a third question. I told you I'd get to all your questions.

KarenLee: Thank you.

Jessica: I like a challenge. So what's the third question?

Cam: You were asking about our relationship as business partners.

KarenLee: Yes.

Jessica: Oh, that's right. That's right. Interesting. What are you asking about this relationship?

KarenLee: Yesterday, when I did the tarot, it seemed like there was a lot of—two cards popped out, and I wanted to put one back and kind of say, "No, you gotta keep that one."

Jessica: What was it?

KarenLee: They were both along these lines of—it might have been this, but again, I'm not 100 percent sure.

Jessica: That's a great card. Okay.

KarenLee: They were all about not being afraid and just going out and choosing to not give a shit about what people think and just do your thing that you've been working on.

Jessica: Okay.

KarenLee: Just saying that that's where I was going. And then I was thinking in terms of Cam because he is obviously a partner in this podcast, and in the future, if we do something with TV and things like that, I was saying to him, "Well, is this a good thing for both of us?" It feels like it is.

Jessica: So, in your relationship chart, you have a Sun/Midheaven/North Node/Saturn conjunction, which means that it makes weirdly perfect sense that the two of you would have a public career together.

KarenLee: Wow.

Jessica: Weird. I would never have guessed that from a parent/child relationship. Here we are.

KarenLee: Right, and that's the question I ask.

Jessica: Here are my caveats, okay? It could be either of you. Based on our conversations and based on looking at both of your charts, I'm going to guess it's Cam, but it could be either of you—will at some point need to pivot or change. And the other person will feel threatened and harmed by that, and the two of you do not have great boundaries. Sorry. And so this is going to be a sticky situation. I imagine you've had moments of this throughout your relationship. I mean, you couldn't be closer, right?

And so the agreements the two of you make need to have flexibility to them so that it feels like success and it isn't just externally successful, because you have all the markers for professional public success, but you don't have all the markers for flexibility and good boundaries. In fact, you don't have many. So that's the thing I would work on. And this isn't about—I guess, arguably, your whole shtick is, "No boundaries. Let's just do this," right? So you make it work for you.

But that's not what I'm talking about. I'm more talking about there is a way that you're very different people around negotiating boundaries. KarenLee, you're actually really great at being like, "No, don't want it. No." And then, Cam, when I look at your chart, you come across like you're good at it, but I don't know that you are good at it. Does that make sense to you?

Cam: Yeah. I think many times in this conversation, you've been like, "There's no boundaries here. You gotta do something."

Jessica: Yeah. Yeah. And this, just like in any other professional relationship, can be contractually negotiated. The problem is family relationships are not usually contractually negotiated, and there's an inherent power differential: mom/child. And so I would definitely say if you're going to do something like sign up for a season or multiple seasons on a TV show, I would recommend you get a mediator who is there to represent both of your needs, not because there's conflict—usually mediators are employed when there's a conflict. I'm not actually seeing a conflict.

I'm seeing that you two could simply use a third party to make sure that both of your fears and hopes are addressed in your contractual agreement. And this might not be—like if you do something with Netflix, it might not be with your contract with Netflix. It might be a contract you make between the two of you, not legally binding unless you want it to be, where you make agreements so, Cam, if you're just like, "My podcasting company is popping off, and I need to step back," that there's infrastructure so that you're not abandoning the project and you're not abandoning your mom with no recourse, because the project depends on both of you. There's some sort of agreements there.

And this will make it so that neither of you feel—neither of you get screwed in any way. Not that I see that one of you would screw each other at all, but I'm—prepare for the worst, and then be thrilled when something moderately bad happens. I'm Jewish. I know things. So that's what I recommend for the two of you.

KarenLee: Thank you.

Jessica: And, for whatever it's worth, Cam, in doing this, you're developing skills that you need for the partnership that you theoretically want. So it's worth doing in that way. And I think it would be very soothing for you, KarenLee. I think it would be very soothing for you.

KarenLee: Yeah. I have this foreboding fear that I gotta get this thing done soon because I'm already getting old, you know? We talked about that before we started this podcast.

Jessica: Oh. Interesting. You're like, "Tick tock. Tick tock. We've got to get this done."

KarenLee: Tick tock. I'm not going to look as good as I look right now five years from now.

Jessica: I respect that. Also, it's a cartoon.

KarenLee: Right, right, right. But—

Jessica: But I understand. You're going to be doing press and yada, yada, yada.

KarenLee: Yeah.

Jessica: I hear you. I will say that your fears show up in your relationship chart, and it's important that you remember who the fuck you are. It doesn't matter how old you are. As long as you are willing to evolve and pivot your relationship to beauty and vanity, you're not going to have a problem with that unless you let it. You know what I mean? I mean, every woman has a fucking problem with that. And, also, you're going to be able to be working till you're old as fuck—

KarenLee: Yay.

Jessica: —if you want to.

KarenLee: That's the inherent question that I had over all those three questions.

Jessica: You have to be really careful with your immune system. Do you have a thyroid issue?

KarenLee: I did. I had a big issue—

Jessica: Did you have it removed?

KarenLee: No. It was a virus. It went in, attacked, and then went out. Thank God.

Jessica: Wow. You had a virus to your thyroid?

KarenLee: Silent thyroiditis.

Jessica: I've never heard of that. But your chart is classic for this, even though I'd never heard of it. When you get physical ailments, they kind of debilitate you, and they're often difficult to diagnose. They're random. They're often related to your metabolic system. You have to do a lot to support your kidneys and your liver,  like stuff that you can address with Chinese medicine.

But, broadly speaking, you're quite healthy. And you have to be that California person who doesn't eat all these foods in order to stay right with yourself. So don't go back to Illinois. It'll be a pain in your ass. You gotta stay here.

KarenLee: Don't worry. That ain't happening.

Jessica: Outside of that, all bodies—I mean, they're made for a limited time only, right?

KarenLee: Right.

Jessica: They don't last forever. But you have so much energy, and as long as you're managing your health, you don't only have five years. And, fun fact, Cam has commitment issues. Now, Cam, I don't know if you think you have commitment issues, but I think you have commitment issues, so I'm just saying it like it's a fact. And so the more worried you are of, like, "Oh shit. I only have a certain amount of time," the more that Cam kind of shuts down. Cam, does that feel right to you?

Cam: I would agree that, yeah, it's definitely hard for me to find something to commit to. But she's never expressed any ambiguity around the podcast or our work together—

KarenLee: No.

Cam: —so it's never created any issues for me in terms of fear of—

KarenLee: Jessica, what we did—

Cam: —is she going to bail out?

KarenLee: What he and I both did not bring up is we both have—and this goes with my other daughter, and it goes with a lot of family members in my past—huge anxiety. Huge, especially—ours is medical anxiety.

Jessica: Okay.

KarenLee: Other members may have social anxiety, but we as a—I can speak for you on this, I'm sure, Cam.

Cam: It's this duo.

KarenLee: It's a duo of anxiety.

Jessica: Okay. I see. And that's a lot of what I'm talking about. I talk about boundaries. I'm saying that because I'm seeing these anxieties. And I wasn't seeing it as medical—like an anxiety disorder or whatever. I was just seeing it as in situations. But that makes sense. And, again, being clear with people is hard when you're feeling anxious because you're not feeling clear. That's part of the problem with anxiety.

So that makes sense. And, also, when I come back to this relationship chart, the opportunities that you're being offered around TV or whatever it is, you don't need to jump at the first thing you're offered if it's not the right offer. And if you're feeling like tick tock, tick tock, you might be like, "It's not perfect, but I gotta." You don't gotta do shit, girl. You don't gotta do shit.

So it's important to shop around your options. The thing is that in this situation, you are uncharacteristically driven by a fear, and that's because of aging. And aging as a woman in public is a fucking bitch. It's tough. It's just—it's tough. And I think that there's an opportunity in this, and you know what the opportunity is, and you take the opportunity. But the older you get, the more you gotta take the fucking opportunity, and it gets harder to do.

So here we are, and I do think that it's just about continuing to have that conversation with yourself around what it means to age in public, and what does doing it look like for you? What does doing it in a healthy way look like for you? Because you can command great opportunities as a team. Don't jump on the first good opportunity out of fear. That's the full message on that that I wanted to make sure I expressed.

Well, thank you both so much for having me.

Cam: Thank you.

KarenLee: Thank you.

Jessica: It's a true pleasure.

Cam: You're amazing.

KarenLee: You are.

Jessica: Thank you so much.

Cam: I'm so glad we met.

Jessica: Me, too. Me, too.

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My loves, welcome to the astrology corner of Ghost. This week, there is a lot for us to talk about. I'm going to get into it in a second, but I got a little bit of news for you to start this off. On January 2nd, 2022, at 10:33 a.m. Pacific Time, we have a New Moon, the first New Moon of the New Year. And at that very time on that very date, I am offering a class in partnership with Rachel Budde of Fat and the Moon. She is an herbalist, and if you don't already know about Fat and the Moon, look them up.

What the two of us are doing is we're teaming up to offer you a class to be supportive for 2022. Every year, I drop a year-ahead horoscope. This year's year-ahead horoscope I'm going to be dropping on December 30th or the 31st; I'm not sure. If you're not already subscribed to the podcast, do hit that subscribe button wherever you listen to podcasts, and then you'll get the alert when the episode comes out.

As I was working on the astrology of 2022, I hit some road bumps. It's a lot. There's a lot going on. We have been going through a lot. We are in a global pandemic. There are many things happening, and it's a stressful time. And the struggle I have with predictive astrology is that it can be really stressful, and it can be really upsetting. I don't want to stress you out and upset you. Honestly, I'm actually okay with stressing you out and upsetting you when it's helpful. But predictive astrology can get sticky that way.

So, anyways, this is why I'm overjoyed to be partnering with Rachel to offer you this class on January 2nd. It's virtual. You can join from anywhere. And if that time and date doesn't work for you, once you sign up for the class, you're going to get a copy. So you're going to be able to enjoy it at any time. You don't have to join live.

Anyways, what we're doing here is I'm going to unpack and explain each of the major transits and how they're going to feel in 2022. And Rachel will share the plants that are corresponding and supportive to what we're going through and give really practical, user-friendly information on how to work with those plants and to use them to support you through all the things we're going through and are forthcoming.

You will be able to come away from this class not only with more astrology and herbology knowledge but with practical tools that you can return to throughout the year and use them to support yourself and your friends and your family and your community. So sign up. The link to the class is in the episode notes. It'll also be on my website, lovelanyadoo.com. Also, it will be on their website at fatandthemoon.com. So there's really no shortage of places you can get tickets, and I'm really, really, excited to be offering this, and I hope to see you there.

Okay. So we are going to be looking at the astrology of December 19th through the 25th of 2021. And I'm not going to blow your mind when I tell you there's a lot going on. I'm guessing you can feel it, right? You can feel that there's a lot going on. We're in Eclipse season. We're feeling the Eclipsy feels. It's the end of the year. There's a new variant of the pandemic.

As this year closes, what I want to encourage you to consider is the stories, the stories that you've been telling yourself about yourself, about the world, about your relationships, about life. And I want to encourage you to question your stories and to question them by holding them up against your actual lived experiences, the evidence around you. If your stories exist mainly to justify your emotions, then you maybe need to revisit those stories and question them.

Astrology, at least the way I like to use it, is a tool for self-care, reflection, insight, strategies, growth. It's all the things. I mean, it's so many more things. But astrology doesn't do the work for you. It's a tool. Astrology, as far as I use it, is not a belief system; it's a tool. It's a tool you gotta learn how to use and you've got to choose to use.

So, as we approach the Solstice this year, as we approach the end of 2021, which has been a really intense year in a really intense decade, I want to just remind you that it's time to look within. It's time to reflect and to not just do the reflection but to then use whatever we find through our reflection and to use it in a way that works for us. So I use the word "use" because I'm a Capricorn. You might want to motivate on it. You might want to start vision-boarding it. There's a million ways we can embody what we divine of ourselves. There's so many ways we can work on it.

What we don't want to do is just be data collectors and storytellers without emotional integration or real-life activation. Remember, astrology doesn't do the work for you. You do the work, and astrology can help you to determine what work you want to do and to help you to understand your story a little bit better.

Again, there's a lot going on astrologically. And I am constantly thinking about not just how can I tell you what's happening, but how can I help you to integrate what you're hearing? That work of integrating what we hear of having the discernment to take in and take on useful things, things we can work with, and maybe put other bits of data to the side until we can cope with them better, whatever it is—that work is kind of an ongoing bit of work that we all have to do, whether you're listening to an astrology podcast or you're reading the news or anything else.

So just stay with it is the hot take I'm coming away with here. Just stay with the work, even when it's hard—maybe especially when it's hard. That's it.

Let's start at the beginning. December 19th, Venus is officially Retrograde.  I talked about the Venus Retrograde transit very extensively in Episode 236. If you missed it, go back. Listen to it. And I'm going to kind of touch on it a little bit more with the first Venus Retrograde transit we have later in the week, but I will say this. Venus goes Retrograde for a reason. There's actually value in the Retrograde. So don't fear the damn Retrograde. I understand that for some people it's a lot more uncomfortable than others. For some people, it's actually kind of a great time.

Regardless of how easy or difficult it is, what I want to say is really important—is that you engage with the energies in a constructive way. I mean, Venus is in damn Capricorn anyways, right? So what this might look like is simply being willing to look inside, to review, revisit, and reconsider your values, your relationships, how you're engaging with your finances or other people. You know where I'm going with this, right?

So don't fear the Retrograde. Instead, work with the Retrograde, engage with the Retrograde, and be willing to learn from the Retrograde and with the Retrograde. That's the whole point of all this stuff. Question your values. And if you find cause for change, be willing to consider change, what that might look like for you, what that means.

Now, on the 19th, we have another exact transit. The Sun will be forming an exact sextile to Jupiter, and this is a really lovely transit. This transit is associated with growth and resiliency. It can be a time where we feel just a break, a lovely break.

And if things have been growing great for you, then this can be a really fun, lovely transit where you just have a bunch of serendipity happen in your days. I mean, whether or not things are going well for you, you may have serendipity and a sense of things just kind of coming together. If things have been really rough, this can be a time where you feel more resilient and a bit buoyed, and you may have some sort of positive break or little moments of luck, or you might make your own luck. That's a thing.

This transit is so lovely that if you make use of it, you're going to get more out of it. What that basically means is show up. Show up to the best of your ability to see where you can bring your resilience, where you can bring your gratitude or a sense of optimism, and how it can help you, and to do this in, again, a way that reflects your values because this transit is exact alongside the Venus Retrograde. So we want to really understand that these transits are connected in that way because they're happening at the same time.

Now, on the 20th, we have an exact trine between Mercury and Uranus. So Mercury is in Capricorn. Uranus is in Taurus. So it's a nice, earthy trine. I love the Mercury trine to Uranus. It's really great for seeing things from a more open standpoint, communicating your boundaries, your needs, your desires, in a more creative way, like finding new ways of saying things.

This transit can be great for listening, for actually listening to other people, to what they have to say, and being present for that. This can be a time where your ideas come together, right? Your words find you. And that's really lovely. It's also a great transit for friendship. It's a great transit for connecting with people. This is a week where it's nice to connect with people, so don't be shy. Text a friend. Do what you gotta do. Of course, do it safe because pandemic, global plague, you know. Be safe. Wear a mask.

Okay. So that brings us to the 21st of December. It's Capricorn season. The Sun moves into the zodiac sign of Capricorn, and when the Sun is at zero degrees of Capricorn, it is the Winter Solstice here in this part of the world that I'm in. I'm in California, USA. The Winter Solstice is happening on December 21st, 2021, 8:00 a.m.

This is a time when we honor the return of the Sun, and it's also the longest night of the year. And I like that. It's real lovely. Talking about Solstices and Solar ingresses is not my specialty or my favorite things to do, but it is worth noting this particular Winter Solstice chart. When we look at the exact timing of  this chart, it of course includes the Venus Retrograde, the Venus/Pluto conjunction, which we're about to have our second hit of. It includes a Mars square to Jupiter, a Saturn/Uranus square, and a Moon opposition to the Pluto/Venus conjunction. It's a lot in this Solstice.

And so the reason why I think this is really important and why I am sharing it is because this season has the markings of being really fucking intense. This Solar season or this wintertime, as you want to hold it, has all the astrological markings of being really intense. And there's a lot of ways that this can play out, but I would be remiss if I didn't say that in a global pandemic with a new variant rapidly taking hold in many, many places, including the U.S., in case you were curious, my American friends—I would be remiss to not say this chart looks intense, and it looks frustrating.

To me, that plus a few other things I'm going to talk about in just one moment are meaningful markers of concern in the context of COVID. And, of course, we're all critical-thinking, common-sense people here at Ghost of a Podcast Industries, so we do not take medical or scientific advice from astrologers. That would be weird. But from my perspective with the resources that I have, I'm taking this new variant very seriously, and I am being very careful. And because I care about you, I want to encourage you to take it seriously and to be very careful. Whether or not you're fully vaccinated, be very careful. Wear a mask. Socially distance. Wash your paws and moisturize. Just keep on moisturizing. I don't want to blow your mind, but it feels nice. It's a nice thing to do.

Anyways, be careful this Solstice season, and know that when there's great stress and tension, we tend to have more conflict because it's hard to act your best when you don't feel right. So have a little grace with yourself. Strive to have a little grace with others, and stay safe. Take care of yourself. Take care of your community, both the immediate community around you, but of course also global community, global pandemic. You know the damn drill.

Okay. That brings us to the big astrology announcement. We have got on the 23rd of December another exact square between Saturn and Uranus. It's not great. It's not great. I laugh because I'm nervous, not because it's funny. So this transit, you know it's been going on all year. I have talked about it a lot. And it's kind of a bummer that it's happening right now, but here we are. Right? Here we are. I will say that in 2022, there will be a little pause from this transit, and we will not have another perfectly exact hit, but we will have something very close to an exact hit at the end of 2022.

So this transit is staying with us. It's staying with us, and that's not great news because it's really stressful. This transit is associated with energy crises, economic crises, and that is because it is associated with structural and infrastructure crises. This transit is also associated with the fact that legislation is not keeping up with technology, not quick enough. Technology is a very rapid and evolving field, and government not as much. And government would be Saturn, and technology would be Uranus. And so there is tension there.

Now, gratefully, there are places around the world that are starting to outlaw Clearview AI, and it's possible that we will see this kind of AI become illegal, which is very, very good news for every human everywhere. But it hasn't happened yet. We'll see if it happens. But, again, here we have the potential for technology to be used against people instead of for people because of many reasons, including but not limited to we don't have laws to protect us. Our lawmakers don't really understand technology.

The Saturn/Uranus square—in the best-case scenario, we may see or can expect to see meaningful, structural, and humane change. This will be great. I imagine that we will look back at this—maybe this specific date, more likely this specific period—and understand it as a meaningful benchmark for change. And that might be in unexpected and chaotic ways. We might be seeing revolutionary change. And we may also see systemic change. But we can expect, because it's a square and not a trine, a lot of resistance to those changes. And that resistance can happen from individuals or the systems that uphold societies and businesses and families and all of that kind of stuff.

When we have a Saturn/Uranus square, we have tension between the old and the new and the tried and true and the innovative. And that can go lots of different ways. In the context of COVID, yeah, we are seeing major frustrations with the new variant. People are so frustrated with the government and with scientists for not being psychics, honestly. It's not like I'm not trying to hold governments accountable. I have a lot of criticisms for all government.

That said, this is a new variant of a new disease, and we cannot expect governments and people who make vaccines and such to be psychics who predict things accurately and on time. That's not a thing. It is really frustrating to not have answers. We want answers, Saturn, so that we can protect our own individual freedoms, Uranus. And that's human. It's human.

But remember that this transit is psychological and behavioral. We, in this transit, are likely going to need to protect our freedoms, Uranus, by being conservative, Saturn, or finding new ways of craving and creating security for ourselves and our communities that meet the needs of the moment. That's again Saturn/Uranus. In other words and more plainly, we all have to compromise because we are living through something that is unique and real and impacts us all.

I'm burnt out on COVID. Are you? Yeah, of course you are. You didn't even need to answer. I just knew it. Everybody's fucking burnt out of this fucking pandemic. Of course we are. Some people handle it better than others. Some people's lives are more adversely impacted than others. But we all need to make individual compromises. We all need to make individual compromises in order to protect ourselves, our loved ones, and the larger community. It's just where we're at. And because of this transit—I mean because of human nature, but also, this is classic of the transit. Saturn is in Aquarius. We're social distancing. It's squaring Uranus. We're really social distancing, and it's unpredictable. We don't know when it's going to end. We don't know what the rules are because the rules keep on changing.

Again, this is all classic of the transit. And it's important to know that the transit's happening for a reason. I'm not positive what the reason is. I got my theories. But it's happening for a reason, and you and me and everyone around us are part of it. So finding ways of engaging with the limitations that you're being faced with with the unpredictability of life and the stress that it's causing—finding ways of coping with this that are psychological—in other words, that embrace your mental health and wellness—is really important. It's the way to sustain this path.

This is psychologically very stressful whether you've ever had COVID, whether you know anyone who has. It doesn't matter. It's just really stressful to live through this. And so do your best. Do your best to investigate how you cope with frustration and compromise and feeling blocked or stymied. These are difficult emotions. No one likes them. No one's great at it. But you get to find out how you engage with this stuff and find better ways if possible. Support yourself better if possible.

You are going to see a lot in other people. You have been seeing a lot about other people and how they compromise or not, whether their individualism is toxic or not, right? Because it's a square between Saturn and Uranus, we can expect to see things that are uncomfortable, to experience things that are uncomfortable. We certainly already have as the transit has impacted all of 2021. But in a way, honestly, it's time to grow up. Saturn's involved, right? It's time to grow up regardless of age. It's not about age. It's important for us to show up and engage with the realities that we're all sharing responsibly, ethically, and with consideration—consideration for our long-term wellness, but the wellness of others.

This will inevitably require that we pivot and change and that we are innovative and willing to explore different ways of being, being in ourselves, being in the world. And given that this is happening over the Christian holiday of Christmas, a lot of people are going to be with family or dealing with family stuff. If that's the case, don't forget who you are. This is an opportunity to grow up, to be the person that you've grown into, the person you want to be, even when you're around your old triggers and your old dynamics.

This is going to be a time where we need healthy boundaries. So, in the context of interpersonal and family boundaries—I've dropped lots of content about this, but in Episode 234, a very recent episode, I talked about "That's just Sally being Sally." And if you know what I'm talking about, no need to relisten to it. But if you don't know what I'm talking about and you need to have boundaries with family or friends and you don't have, you may want to relisten to that question that I answered at the start of the episode to get a little boundary one-on-one content. Why not? Go do it.

Okay. So the upshot here is whether we're talking about family stuff, whether we're talking about interpersonal stuff, whether we're talking about how we engage with the world. In the global pandemic or not, we need to find new ways of holding boundaries. And doing that in old dynamics is profound. It's deep, and it's meaningful, and it 's difficult. But it's worth it. And at this point, wearing masks, washing our hands, all that kind of stuff in the context of COVID, being considerate, making decisions around how you're going to handle this medically—all of this stuff, it's not new anymore. I mean, it's new. It's new in a lot of ways, but it's also not. We're in this.

So how do you need to pivot or not? How do you need to engage psychologically and behaviorally, materially? These are really important questions to be asking yourself. And the truth is, this week, because this transit will be exact, plus all the other stuff, you may not feel that you have the energy to really think about these things. You might just find yourself in a position where you're acting/reacting, reacting/acting.

And if that's the case, I do want to encourage you to do what you gotta do. Go to the bathroom. Close the door. Take a deep breath. Slow down and check in with yourself. Check in with yourself around how you're behaving and whether or not it reflects how you intend to be behaving. Check in with your mental health. How can you support yourself? And sometimes that just means being honest with yourself about, "Yeah, I am hanging on by a thread today. That's where I'm at."

If that's what you come to, if you're like, "Okay, that's my reality right now," then it becomes a little bit easier to be like, "Okay. That's my reality. What do I need to do in order to, I don't know, not make things worse in my relationships or support myself?"—whatever it is. You don't need to do perfect. You just want to do your best. That's the goal here. And because Saturn square to Uranus is happening, yeah, that might be real fucking hard. It's a square. It's a 90-degree angle, and because it's a 90-degree angle, it's not easy. So be gentle, my friends. Be gentle.

Now, one last thing I'll add about this particular transit is that it is happening at 11 degrees of Aquarius and Taurus, so fixed signs. So if you have any planets around 11 degrees in fixed signs in particular—so those fixed signs are Leo, Aquarius, Scorpio, and Taurus—then you're really going to feel this. It's going to hit your personal life very directly. So, again, be gentle with yourself, and show up. This is a test of your maturity. Show up, my loves, to the best of your ability.

So that's the Saturn square to Uranus. And that brings us to the 25th. On December 25th, we've got two exact transits. The first one is a Mars trine to Chiron. Mars trine to Chiron is actually a really fortifying transit. I'd love to see this transit alongside the Saturn square to Uranus because it is empowering us to act in ways that reflect the change we want to be.

Chiron is kind of like Pluto in that even when it's an "easy aspect," it can feel a little hard. But those trines and sextiles, those a.k.a. benefic aspects, what they do is they give us the energy of support so that we can move through whatever difficulties with more grace, more ease, and often better results. So that's kind of cool. Mars trine to Chiron can give us a real boost, and that boost of energy is what we need to do the work that we're being called to do and to keep on keeping on, as it were. Okay?

Now, the other exact transit that is happening on this day is a Venus Retrograde conjunction to Pluto. Does that sound familiar? Of course it does, because it's happening again. It happened on December 11th, you may remember. And if you don't, you can always listen to Episode 235, where I talked about it a lot. And then it's going to come back. It's going to come back on March 3rd of 2022. So that's a very long time to be influenced by these energies.

There's a lot going on with this fucking transit, and I will say it brings up intense compulsive feelings. And generally, when Pluto's involved, those feelings are difficult. Pluto governs shame and resentment and all kinds of other heavy things. But you want to keep in mind now Venus is Retrograde. Venus Retrograde is not the time to ask, "What should I do?" It's time to ask, "What are my values and motivations here? What do I actually value? How can I show up in ways that reflect my values?"

And this is all because Venus Retrograde, right? Because that's what Venus Retrograde wants us to ask. And because it's in the zodiac sign of Capricorn, it's all very pragmatic. It's all very practical. It's very material, and that doesn't just mean money. It means body image. It means what you do in the material world.

When we add in the data, when we add in the extra layer of the conjunction between Venus and Pluto, the questions we need to be asking ourselves are, "What am I willing to give up for what I value and love and hold dear?" because Pluto requires that we let go of what isn't serving us, or we just not hold so tightly on to what we value and what we cherish.

Pluto takes us, honestly, to the underworld and back. And the underworld can be a lot of different things. It can be the depths of your psyche. It can be your worst fears. It can be all manner of difficulty. But how we deal with it, what happens, this is on us. This is again where we can understand that the astrology of the Venus/Pluto conjunction is going to be confronting some sort of Venusian themes. And, in particular, you can look at where these planets are moving through in your birth chart, so where you have late-degree Capricorn is going to be the part of your life that gets hit by this transit in particular.

But how you engage, how you show up, how you honor your values or not, how you respect other people's values or not—these things are all dependent on you and me and all of us. Right? Whether we look at this on a personal level or on a social level or political level, there's things we need to give up in order to be more authentic and ethical. If we instead seek to be like, "Okay, well, what is that? What do I do?" then you're already going to feel confused because it's a Retrograde. We're meant to look within and ask questions.

I know it's annoying. I'm sorry. It's difficult. It's annoying. It's all the things. But if you're seeking answers to questions right now, all these questions I've named and more, it's going to be difficult for you to feel like you're getting answers. But instead, if you investigate, if you look within in that Plutonian way, you will get a lot more value out of this. You will actually come to your answers more organically. Life is not about a series of destinations, of accomplishments. Life is about the path we take to those destinations. It's about the damn journey. But when we're in pain and when we're experiencing fear, we tend to forget. So this is not the time to forget.

Because of Pluto, you may be feeling or people around you may be feeling any of the classic Plutonian feelings, like betrayal, resentment—you may be feeling compulsive or addictive. Terror and real fear may be triggered. You may feeling shame or guilt, and this may in particular show up as fear around money issues or loneliness—again, scarcity around these Venusian themes.

And the potential here—and this is in no small part because of the fact that it's happening in Capricorn, but the potential here is that we can take a practical approach to making sustainable progress. And this practical approach is in part by not abandoning ourselves or, if this is coming up in a relationship with someone else, not abandoning others when these scary and kind of taboo difficult emotions emerge. This is key. I cannot stress this enough. Pluto is the planet that governs abandonment—abandonment of self, abandonment of others, and again, personally and socially. And we do not want to abandon anyone, ourselves included, just because we're feeling fucked up.

So pay attention, my loves. Pay attention to your emotions and the emotions of others, and do your best to show up and to show up in ways that reflect your values. And if you can't show up, then to hold that boundary in a way that reflects your values. We want to be conscientious about how we use our power, and we all have power—again, some of us a lot more than others. Some of us are a lot more comfortable with using it than others, but we all have power, and it's very important that we are not abusing our powers or shrinking away from embodying our power at this time.

Power itself is not corrupt. It's the misuse of power that is corruption. It's really important that we understand that all of us have Pluto in our birth charts, and we are in a very Plutonian time. And yes, in the 2022 year-ahead podcast episode, I will talk about the Pluto Return. And if you've listened to me talk about the Pluto Return recently, which I have done in a recent episode a bit, or if you've done any kind of research, you know that this is a time where the United States is having to confront its use and abuse of power. We're seeing this socially. We're seeing this globally. And, also, we are likely to see this in our personal lives during this Venus/Pluto time.

So I'm telling you these dates when it's exact, but even when the transits are not exact, we are in this larger phase where we're going to be impacted by these themes. And it's kind of a long phase. So do your best to engage with this stuff in a healthy way. And here's a little pro tip, okay? Entitlement and defensiveness are two sides of the same shitty coin. Yeah, I'm going to repeat that. Entitlement and defensiveness are two sides of the same shitty coin. Instead of entitlement and defensiveness, try to seek empowerment and boundaries. They're also two sides of the same coin; it's just a much nicer coin.

Emotions are big right now. They're big and a lot. And it may be a really hard time for a lot of people. So check in on your loved ones, and if you need help, reach out and ask for it. That's a really good use of this energy. Remember you're connected to this Earth, this weird, beautiful, terrifying place that we share. You're connected to it, and this Earth is a resource. It's a resource that you can energetically connect to. Put your feet on the ground. I know it's cold in a lot of places, so maybe wear your socks. Wear your shoes. But put your feet on the ground.

Hug a damn tree. Hug a damn tree. Pet a cat. Connect to organic matter that is uncomplicated and makes you feel loved, makes it easier for you to experience love. Start there if you're having a real rough time, and let that support you. And use that support to be kinder to yourself and others, to show up more for yourself and for others.

Now, I want to share one more thing, and it's actually about the Solstice. So, ten years ago this very Solstice, I met the person who would become my forever fiancé. And yeah, we're having our ten-year anniversary this year, and I'm really excited about it. And I thought I'd share it because this very same beautiful trans man is not just my partner in life but my partner in Ghost of a Podcast. He edits and produces it and is just basically my bestie through it. And I feel really lucky about that. I feel really lucky to have someone that I love who loves me back who's a really wonderful partner to me in this life.

But I'm also really grateful that this same nerd is somebody that I can work with. This ten-year anniversary that my partner and I are celebrating this week, part of that is actually celebrating this thing that we've created together, this podcast that we really love. And I just thought I'd share with you that Ghost of a Podcast is made with love, like literally made with love from me and my forever fiancé. And maybe we shouldn't be surprised as astrology nerds that the person that I met on the Winter Solstice is somebody that I work with, because hey, Capricorn season, hey.

Now, I got one more piece of news for you, which is this: I'm building a new website. Well, I've been building a new website for many months, many months. And I hope to be launching it this very week. And I say I hope because you know what? Things don't always go according to plan, and that's okay. But hopefully you will visit it because it's fucking gorgeous. It's gorgeous. It's supposed to be launching around the 21st, right in time for the Saturn square to Uranus. Yeah, I'm a damn genius.

I will talk about it more once it's out in the world. I just wanted to give you a little heads-up because if you frequent my website to read my weekly horoscopes or use the free chart-drawing tool I have or—I've got so much free content on my site, so if you're a person who goes there, you might be like, "Wait a minute. Where am I? Where am I?" And I want to say you're home. Welcome. Make yourself comfortable.

Okay. That's it, my nerds. If you're celebrating a holiday this week, have a happy holiday. Don't forget to sign up for my damn class. If you haven't already joined me over on Patreon, this is a real good time to do it because there's just—I got lots of really great content on there, and I love my patrons. If you're a patron and you're listening, I thank you. I thank you so much because I really love my patrons, and I love being able to connect on Patreon. So join me over on Patreon if you haven't already, and of course, send in your questions, if you got them, to be answered on the podcast. You can just go to ghostofapodcast.com or go to my main website, lovelanyadoo.com. These are places on the internet, the World Wide Web. Have you heard of it?